And so,
we're going to
take the world by storm
set fire in the realm
Each one of us
in his own corner
Yes!
We shall
leave a trail
of white hot flame
burning up
smoldering
right in the face of pain
Here comes the blast!
Of a kind of stardust
tiny particles
celebrating victory
They burst forth
through the
interstellar air
radiant, incandescent
sometimes quite
contradictory

Enough hiding
within a tiny room
without a view, I say
Open up the portholes
Let in the cold night air
It wakes up my senses
as I send up
and out
a brand new round
of auroral flares

The space traveler
is done
with the dark side
of the moon
Just watch
as she unfurls
and cosmic flowers
start to bloom

Goodnight
to all my loved ones
near and far
May you sleep in the light
of the most shining star
and when your dreams
curl and whirl
around your brain
May they only bring sweetness
minus any pain
Even if forgotten
by morning's light
may they plant a seed
that glows, so bright
and gives insight and wisdom
to your subconscious parts
soothes and heals
any wounds
in your heart
May they wrap themselves
Around your soul
Like a vine
And give you inspiration
Like gossamer, so fine
May those dreams
lift you up
And give courage to your soul
Sew up the fractures
And make you whole

And I am a Woman
who so knows herself
my inner power
alive and kicking
more as each
Blessed year
passes by
My light growing
my blood flowing
into the Universe
as it speaks through me
I have strength
that could electrify
a thousand stars
gathered over many years
of my life's battles
and wars
Mine is a quiet sort
Of fortitude
unstoppable with tears
I am my own warrioress
When it comes to my fears
I have my guides
and they know me well
goddesses and angels…
old friends
wielding
magic spells

But nevertheless
I have
A vulnerable side
Underneath the layers
Of protection and pride
an enchanted forest
of moss and green
a sacred space
that only few will see
Inside this inner sanctum
I am as soft as
fine silk
I let down my guard
as emotions flow
like milk

I am an unlikely
desert flower
Who just wants to
open up to you
to be opened
petal by petal
to receive the waters
of your tender care
most vulnerable
with her
stamen exposed
to be cherished
in the cool night air
I am delicate
as tiny spring buds
caught in the
harshest winter
storms
yet who persists
despite the odds
to keep her
cold spots warm

There is a rumor
In the foreign lands.
Some say
(especially in the East)
I have the elixirs
to tame
the most savage
kind of beasts
(Indeed,
Sometimes
as they come for a
sweet, well deserved rest
lay their huge, furry heads
upon my tender breast)

As for you, my Wild One
I think I hold the potion
to the key to your heart
to your beautiful soul….
Yes, poetry in motion
I want to bring it such light
Ignite your embers
To a spark
I could fill you up
So much
You just might not
feel your inner
Dark

But there is something
important to remember
The One who finds my key
Is the one
Who will be crowned
Defender
Of my tender soul
In all its hues
And asymmetry
Oh, Please, my love
Use it wisely
With the most loving
Of discretion
For under the armor
My heart beats raw
Laid bare
To love and passion

Otherwise
My pain will have no end
And I will have to go
Into battle once again

Now
Inside my
sacred cave
I rest
Need to re-charge
For the next
Battle cry
Lift up
Your heart,
To me, my love
Release it
Let it
fly

And today
I will transform
From that weeping,
walking woman
Who wanders
the pathways
Lost,
and in grief
As I try to move on
From a broken state
to a Woman
who is taking back her power
like the most perfect of wild storms
Yes, I will now be the Goddess
I am meant to be
Who understands that her
Beauty
In and out
Only depends on herself
And not even the Love
From others
(Not even from a Lover
who supposedly so very loved her)
I am made of stars
I was before and it continues
I will throw into the
Galactic air
The stardust
That falls from me
As I walk by
I will dry my tears..
For how long can one cry?
I will push back
That cover
of sadness
That blanketed me
Like snow
I could not see
But for the white
And it made my soul
So cold
I am now going
to live out my heat
In whatever form it takes
I will try to cool
My desires
And not leave pain
In its wake
It is time to dry the tears
For too many have fallen
I must now become
The strong being
I was before
And I will gently
Push out of the way
Those who try to stop me
They won’t get far
It is hard to stop oneself
When you become
A shooting star
And I thank the Universe above
For making me who I am
Strong and whole
an Angel who has known
Great pain
But will now move on
Yes
Into the healing realm
Ínto skies like fire
Who prisms of colors
That will take my soul
And heart
ever
Higher

Things are getting better
a little every day…
partially because
I know your love does stay
I understand that we cannot
be together -
I know it.
That is clear
But to know
How much you loved me-
Well, this makes me
feel so special and dear
You see,
I have the poems
that you wrote and sent to me
I have your heart
in writing
and this means more than
anything to me
(even if you
were a samurai
fighting).
Your verse, your pen
The words that flowed
Straight from
your heart into mine
They filled me and still fill me
with a love
that is beyond divine
So even though
I know
in my mind
that we are finished
The heartsongs
you have left me
prove our love
was undiminished.
Yes…I know, my darling
that this romance
is over
and there is nothing to be done
but know
that you were sweet
as clover
as it touches
the tip of my tongue
Yes, I write this with sadness
am still in grief
over this loss
of a love so strong
But I will be all right
with the belief
that we are both
moving on

I summon the power of ice
and arctic air
as well as
a bit of dark
to calm that
powerful glare
Yes, sweet waters
come cool my Desire
help me realize
my passion and fire
I now sit
and write
send up
rainbows
of pure
Light
as I glow
from embers
that smolder
in the night
my hands
raised
up in supplication
I am in my sacred temple
which I discovered
as I roam
surrounded
by my angels
that can only
wrap their wings
around me
and help my heart
get Home

I am trying
to flush you
out of my system
like a drug addict
I am in withdrawal
Every sentence
you whispered to me
every word
of love
imprinted upon
my heart's walls.
I am remembering
the intimate talks
under the stars
on those private
night walks
in the cool
dark air
that soothed
and excited
my burning heart
as secrets and confidences
we did share

As I think of
the sound of your voice
I also know deep inside
That there was a risk
in my secret choice
a danger of loss did abide
for I have others to think of
and that was
too difficult for us
to bear
Yet whilst I realize
that this decision
is wise
the heart is
still prone
to tear.

O comfort me, winds from above
Let me heal from
this burning love
Let the power of
my being
Release my pain
And be so
freeing
I raise my arms
in supplication
I let the calming
night air
rock me to sleep
under Orion's belt I wander
thinking of healing
emotions so deep
soothing my heart
soothing my soul
filling the wound
with a poultice
to seep

And I know
that in my mourning
a lesson will be learned.
Perhaps inside
a small voice of warning
to ensure that
in the future
I will not be burned.
I will feel passion
with joy
and wonder
but make sure
to choose wisely
before it gets deep
to keep my heart
from being pulled a-sunder
to keep my eyes
from wanting to weep.
I will walk through life
and enjoy it
Take it by the horns
And celebrate its fire
I will feed my intelligence
with fodder
of poetry and music
feed my soul
with love and desire
I will strive for perfection
and be a good woman
a great mother
yet never give up
on my dreams
and when needed
I will call upon
divine intervention
to bathe me
in the
sacred light
of its
comforting
beams

If you are in love
And you must go out the door
I have some advice
That I have learned
From yore

Break your lady gently
for though she is made
from the strongest of glass
She can still shatter
Into shards
Upon the silken grass
And it will take ages
To find those thin, tiny slivers
To glue them together,
An almost impossible task
As your hands
Shake and shiver

Break your lady gently
But slice not too deep
For she is still yours,
Even if not to keep
She might rise up
Again
In your heart
And make it bloom
She will still
Calm your soul
And your every wound
And so, fair Lord,
Only if you
absolutely must
Break her down gently
But alas---
keep her trust

You have imprinted
My heart
Like a fine tattoo
And the ink
has stained it
black and blue
like an intricate
henna
in swirls and whorls
a complicated design
in flowers and laurels
every move with
the brush
is fine
It enters
my skin
like a vine
goes into the bloodstream
straight
to my heart
and mixes up
the beats
tears them apart
I need to heal
And let it dry
But instead
I find that
The needle
Is too sweet
(though it makes me cry)
Yet I want more
Of this art
This sleek decoration
I want it all
In glorious, colorful
vibration
Tattoo me, my love
And make me yours
For you have colored
My soul
For forevermore

I have a secret heartache
and it will not go away.
It will need
some time to heal
And it will,
I hope and pray.
I only wanted
fulfillment
I never meant
to cause pain
or feel hurt
in my own soul
as love washed away
like rain

I hope the other
feels it
That love was had and lost
And treasures
The gift given
Even though
It has now
been cruelly tossed.

So now I must nurse
this secret heartache
as I hope
for better days
and wait for the  
pain to subside
by extinguishing
the blaze…
By simply
letting myself feel
by reminding myself
I am whole
that I am worthy
of being loved
and strong
within my soul

And today
I nourish my soul,
Break bread with
the goddesses
who guide me.
I must get strong
to heal from the trauma
from a love
broken
so suddenly
an intense
two months
in which my heart
flew high
I was in
heavenly territory
eating sweet fruits
hearing sweet words
all of which
were imprinted
upon the fabric
of my being.
I never expected
to get used
so bitterly
and my tears fall
both inside
and out.
Yet today
I will make strides
to rise up and up
never to stay
down to long
Rise up from
the embers
of the fire that was
like a phoenix
and, like a pure dove
of Light...
To fly again.

I look upon myself
from above,
not with technology
but with ancient
inner knowledge
Knowledge I have
acquired over
many times, many phases
Ánd what do I see?
A girl-woman
who has burst her chains
and is flying free.

My soul is soaring
Over the verdant greens
of hilltops and mountains
oceans and streams
I hear the faintest cry
of the foxes
and the sonar sound of whales
of mother creatures giving birth
and the quiet
wet slide of snails
I glide over mountain ranges
so high
that one must re-learn
how to breathe
heady oxygen
enters my
bloodstream.

Onto the ice floes
I continue to weave  
Snowy tundras call to me :
"Come to us and receive
The coolness to ease
your burning heart
the shade to relieve your soul…
Dive into the arctic waters
And let the deep freeze flow
Over your body
To calm and soothe
its heat
Into your heart
to temporarily relax
Its torrid beats

Onto
another world
of lush leafy forest
canopies of green
They seem
to understand my yearning
As they let off
their natural steam
instead of burning
Even the beasts cry out
as they come together,
The entire jungle is in estrus,
it seems,
as it comes alive
with a ******* music
beyond the control
of mammal and fowl
As the tigers cry,
I hear the wolves howl…
As all comes undone
At the seams

Now the vast deserts
Call me
Their whorls of texture
Twirling around my soul
But I cannot burn anymore
So I must push on
I must let them go
I need liquid, would do anything
For a drop of some form of water
Please …take me
to a stream or river
It cannot get any hotter
I need to take a dip with all
The nymphs
And otters, frogs
water lilies
sprout in my spine

Let me dive into the depths
Of freshness
Or fly into the depths
Of your soul
I raise my arms in supplication
For now
The heavens are in control


And then..whoosh..
My soul buoys up
Over to you
And within the refuge
Of  your arms
I need no landscape:
It all comes together;
The deserts, the jungles
The mountain air
The frosty ice floes
The forest floor
All the elements are
within this Love
this creation
between you and I
Passion, lust and beauty
Are the only things
That fly

…and now I have landed
no need to
restlessly roam…
for I have landed
in your air space

and my soul--
could it be?
yes,
is at
Home.

And I release you
To the winds
From whence you came
I wish you
A good life
Free from pain
I hope and pray
That you will
remember our love
because it was real…
a beautiful gift
from the stars above
My love for you
Still aches
In my heart…
For you have so cruelly
torn us apart
Together
we planted
a beautiful seed
Born of love, of want
Of lust, of need
Now I look
to the heavens above
and pray for healing,
for you have twisted
the knife in my soul
and my heart
is bleeding

I.

Like an unknown element

of the supernatural,

a mystery of nature…

this cannot be explained

I try to reason,

but the force -

the power -

the wonder -

shakes me up

like percussion under skin

Under influence

Of a small earthquake,

I sway and stumble

Reaching out

As my heart rumbles

In distant thunder

Boom..the heat

Boom…the beat

Pulsations under skin

My flesh tingles

As thoughts of you

Weave a tapestry within.

II.

You

have made

every single cell

call out in boundless

electricity…

Even the membranes

between them

are alight

with tiny stars.

You

have placed wires

beneath my skin

and flipped the switch,

releasing fireworks

where not even

the smallest of flames

burned before.

Now

as I stand in the

black cloak of night

You can see me from afar;

For I am illuminated

from within.

I send smoke signals,

arcs of light,

as I imagine

skin on skin.

III.

My heart

beats sparks

My blood

rushes in ripples

of liquid fire…

the scent of basalt

and obsidian

in the air.

The scent of my own desire

Makes me slick,

Runs like lava

Between my thighs.

I am a-blaze

in a sea of flames

as lava fuels

this vessel

that is my body

And I allow my soul

To rise up

Across oceans

Across mountains…

Rise up

And fly…

I am spiraling

In the cool night air

to meet you

for a quick dance

of explosion

Here, back on earth

a luminescent

fever shakes

my molecules

to the core.

I curl into myself,

Hold my knees,

Float like an embryo

When I am ready,

I unfurl

Reach up

And out.

Take that glow into

My own hands

Cast it

Into air

Like a beacon.

My heart
is a battlefield
and I have gone
to fight.
I've brandished
my sword
like a samurai
I am wearing my armor
But I've
let it down
and thus
find myself
here,
on the ground.
I am trying to get
Up
for it's just
not supposed to be
Yet I
find myself attracted
to the rocks
and the trees
as they look from below
as I gaze up
at the sky
all the time
asking myself
"How? Why?'"
My heart
beats here,
wounded
yet working
and strong
but with cuts
that are deep….
I wonder how long
it will be until
they find me
here
on the floor
of the forest
so green
with a wound
so sore
I lay my weapon
upon the dirt
and turn
to the stars
to comfort
my hurt

Small Issues

When she unlocks her heart
It all comes out
Pouring in a stream
Without seeming end
Everflowing, not always like a river
But rapids
Frothing and bubbling
Heart flushing out poison
Like after a hard night of drinking
When a friend holds hair back
And all the ugliest, nastiest parts  roar  out
Pushed , upchucked
Without control.

Outflow of bitter
Salt of tears
Tears, unsewn, sometimes ripping bigger
Sometimes just bearing it
The worse for wear.
The fabric of her soul
Is often many-layered
And multi-hued.
Rough-spun jute
Next to softest silk.
But today, as heart is opened,
The key misplaced,  
She cannot hold back.
Dizziness and nausea take over.
Silk is torn and waves like a flag.

She raises hands, in supplication
Before holding onto the nearest
Steadying object, be it chair or rail.
Hope arises
for sweet beneath bitter
for clean, warm blood
pumping with life, and flowing  purely
for feeling clean after all the poison is out.
She knows it is there, deep down under
muscle and tissue
She knows
light-filled energy is
somewhere shining
in a low rock pool
right around her solar plexus.

"How we only need,"
she thinks.
"To work out
a few small issues."
Relief
And exhaustion
Take over
As she reaches
for tissues
to wipe away pain
and lie down to rest.
There is some down time
before the next test.

Feb. 2014

You are in my heart -
You reside
between the beats
sometimes I must
catch you
so I may simply breathe
I get palpitations
with adrenaline rushing
When you play
My heartstrings
My cheeks start blushing
The music you play
Inside my soul
Reverberates
And moves me
Down to my toes
I dance, I swoon
My feet turn to jelly
Hot burning waves
Sear deep in my belly
Oh this is crazy
But that's just fine
Play me and strum me
Until I make you mine
I will be your instrument
You will be my notes
Just beat the drum
until my heart floats
under the moon's glow
we sing out our joy
and the music flows
without inhibition
inside my being
And I am filled with wonder
At the power of my feelings
So keep beating on, heart
(Because I know you
Are there)
Let our tongues whisper music
Into the night air

My house is falling apart
Doors unhinged
Appliances on the brink
Electricity crackling where it shouldn't be
My heart
Is trying desperately to remain
Unbroken
I hold it like a soapy dish I've just washed
Hang it gingerly on the line
Let the hot desert wind
Caress it
As it beats.
With each beat I go into myself
For another journey into my alternate universe
A carefree adventure
Of travel, love and lust
Stories untold coming to life
As I spring forth and dance
Energy sparking out from my veins
As my heart spills over with joy and vivacious
glory.
As I go through my list of mundane tasks
That keep my house whole and my children safe,
happy and clean
fed with spoonfuls of my love
I am half relieved that I can provide this:
Mother Earth at her best,
protective arms encircling
their realm.
They do not know that
the other half is all caged animal,
Longing for the wild plain,
The jungle, the ocean
To run without stopping
Or swim
As deep as
I please.
Soar as high
As the sky will allow.
What is this fragile balance that tips ever so slightly
Over the brink
Of sanity?
For now collapsing into
A cool crisp bed
On this hot summer night
Will have to do.
I launch into the land of dreams
as my heart beats  on,
its strings pulling ever
so slightly up
delicate cords tethered
to my chest.
I take my kite-heart
And wrap its strings around my home,
keeping it together as I fly away.

August, 2013

I am no
warmonger
Yet, today,
I am ready
for battle
Hand above brow
searching the mountains
for enemies,
I hold my staff
My sword in tow
My face upturned
To the burning snow

Yes, I am
A warrioress
In her half-polished armor
Some parts shiny, as if new
others marked, beat up
dented, burnt
a rough-hewn tribute
to the steely trials
I've been through

War goddesses
Sekhmet and Athena
Freyja, Astarte
By my side
As I ready my stallion
For the dangerous ride
"We are lucky,"
I whisper, in her beautiful ear
"That time is on our side...
No time for fear"

I am my own commander
In this field of combat
I only have my heart
To wear on my sleeve
I will take my victory
In my vulnerability
Before I close the
doors again
So all of those
non-desireable factors
Better not
upset me

I have always come in peace
I am a gentle soul
But all of this….

Now the tables have turned.
I am ready to yell
My battle-cry
Arms posed for arrow strike
Hair streaming wild
Eyes with the focus
Of a hawk
Watch out.
Take heed.
For I have learned
That good girls
Fight back.
No need to
Senselessly
Bleed
No need to take
unnecessary flack
I have had enough
Of apologies
Enough lowering my brow
I am taking Life
Into my own hands
And my time
To live is
Now
Stand back
Here I come
Move aside
Before I
come
undone

I am being consumed
By inner flames
Just coursing through me
Like a storm in my veins
Without control
I cannot stop them
If I tried
And something must
Be done before I'm fried
This inner inferno
Is seizing me
A sweet conflagration
Of colorful blaze
You are charring my coals
My head in a daze
Call the fire department
Try and put me out
But I think that lava
Will just pour from the spout
I am trapped inside this
Raging funnel of flame
Yes..you've set me on fire
Your love to blame
Now I sit here
And think of what to do
For my glowing hearth
Wants to devour you
I am in a conundrum
Of love and lust
**** put it out
before I combust

I am being consumed
By inner flames
Just coursing through me
Like a storm in my veins
Without control
I cannot stop them
If I tried
And something must
Be done before I'm fried
This inner inferno
Is seizing me
A sweet conflagration
Of colorful blaze
You are charring my coals
My head in a daze
Call the fire department
Try and put me out
But I think that lava
Will just pour out of the spout
I am trapped inside this
Raging funnel of flame
Yes..you've set me on fire
Your love to blame
Now I sit here
And think of what to do
For my glowing hearth
Wants to devour you
I am in a conundrum
Of love and lust
**** put it out
before I combust

The way I know it would be
Is soft like the light
As it slants inside
The window glass
at dawn or dusk
Hush
So quiet
The faintest
Feather touch
Of cheek upon cheek
The most delicate
Of lips brushing
Lips, velvet cream
Of desire
Upon the tips
Of my fingers
As they would caress
Your precious face
Your breathe
Upon me
As our souls mingle
Sweet sensations
Of electricity
That send tingles
Down the path
of my spine
its route, exquisitely divine
Up to the
Roots of my hair,
By now
a stream of flowers
Blooming at your
tender ministrations
Oh, my love
We are the the stars
Of our own
Precious
creation

She met him on the kingsroad
At the early hours of dawn
She noticed he was of noble birth
By his gait and dress,
graceful
As a swan
There was something of an air of mystery
A silent force
That drew him to her
But she didn’t want to attract such attention
From a stranger,
Who barely knew her.

Yet she was bold and found her voice
Decided to raise it to the sun
And gathering courage,
Made her choice
Whatever consequences would then come
"Excuse me, Sire,"
She managed to breathe
And by then it was too late
For he turned around,
The look in his eye was warm and sincere
And she could barely feel her feet.
"Is this the right way to the City
of Dreams?"
She queried, toughly,
For she knew he would bring no harm
And then when he faced her
She took a step back
Not expecting such honest charm

"Yes, indeed" he smiled kindly.
"If I may ask, without further ado..
Why on earth are you walking alone,
A lovely, sweet rose like you?"
She knew what he meant
For it was rough out there
With those who wish
To only take advantage.
With prying eyes
And prying hands.
Preying on those
Who cannot always manage
She knew she could easily
have her purse and legs
Opened by force
by strangers
Theirs was a lawless land
Where values were rare…
One was prone
To many dangers.

"I am stronger than I look, you know"
She aimed her wordly arrow
And struck
"Oh, yes, a feisty one you are,"
Came the retort
His eyes full of humor and *****

"Is this the way to the City of Dreams, or not?"
She asked with spice, yet saw a look so sweet
She imagined him tender, like a flower
As her heart lurched and skipped a beat
"It is, indeed, and apparently
I have found the best way to go.
But will you allow me to accompany you?
I can protect you, you know."

She was a spunky young woman.
Didn’t care about what others said or thought
Yet she hesitated to answer
For she knew her soul was bought

"Mmm..I can manage by myself" she lied
And started to walk ahead quickly
She knew that soon she'd let down her pride
As her soul-craving
Came hot and thickly.
She turned to him,
To hear his answer
But shock was in her eyes
For right in front of her
Exposed, revealed
Was a rare sight
A rather crimson surprise

"Oh, pardon me, Sir,"she said
But before I take my leave
I couldn’t help but notice..
That your heart is upon your sleeve.."

He looked down
And it was true
A blood red mass of pumping
Veins and arteries
That jumped off his beautiful suit
of velvet
"Oh good God" he said
And stumbled back on the pavement

"Wait, don't fall" she cried
And ran to catch him steady
She looked into his eyes and somehow let out
"I am here for you, when you are ready"
I will take your heart and hold it,
never let it go
Keep it warm and safe
Wherever your love will flow
If you want me
I will be yours to choose
Now put in that heart
Before it gets bruised!"

He looked up at her
And his heart was already
On air
He knew he'd better listen
For he was already in a snare

"I'm not sure I can" he gasped
But got up
And brushed himself off
By then his heart pumped
Within his chest
And despite the blood
Smeared upon his vest
She took his arm
And down the kingsroad
they progressed,
Half-aware, half-amazed
at this random meeting,
this unexpected recognition of souls
this feeling of frantic heart-beating…
So much to discover,
As the folds of time
Slowly fall back like wings
so much to revel in,
as Love, sublime
Slowly raises its voice
And sings

After a night of paradise
Love flowing from the very walls
Music flowing from my body
Onto the dance floor
As sensual as ***, yet with only eyes upon me
No touching,
just the deliciousness of looking,
with emotions touched
as the eyes understand,
Something understood without talking
After a night of love like this
You really  know how to gut me out
leave me empty, my insides spilled
like shattered glass
upon the floor
ready to cut those who walk upon it.
My heart , clear as glass,
beats upon that floor, hoping you'll pick it up.
I love you to no end, and I know you love me.
We will be okay.
But in the meantime my heart beats twofold:
Once, upon the steaming platforms of love
Where my body moves in perfect rhythms
Once, on a bed of shards
Where every move may mean a cut.

I have no idea
What brought me here
To this place,
This mystical temple
Of a sacred space
But here I stand
And my arms
My heart
are wide open
Raised to the heavens
As I pray
Open to receiving miracles
Open to the wonders
Of this love
And I wonder
What an alternate universe
May have brought
But it is pointless
For I am thankful
And happy with what I have
I am happy
To have been created as me
To have created and still
To create
And I am elated
To a heavenly sort of place
As my heart I do consecrate
Raise my eyes to the stellar fires
Bless each and one of my earthly
And  unearthly desires

I pour the sacred water
Upon my head
Feel its coolness
In the sparkling night
I feel the divine essence
from above
Bless my spirit, Bless my soul
I thank the Universe
For keeping me whole
For making me a woman,
A mother
A friend devoted
For staying real,
not sugar-coated
For being blessed
A sensual creature
(****** delight
a powerful feature)
I am thankful for my strength
And intellectual liberty
And for my constant fight
To keep myself
Free

And, most of all --
I am ever grateful
For this divine opportunity…
Ever humbled, as it is
Bestowed upon me:
To experience
the profound inner light
of my own emotions
to give myself a gift
of utter devotion
to allow myself
without inhibition
the freedom of expression
I was meant for
To come into
Fruition.
Yes, in joy
Yes, in wonder
I raise my head to the heavens
And take in the thunder

I have got this hunger
A craving, you could say
It comes to me
When I least expect it
And won't go away

It enters my bloodstream
Pulses through
My veins
It doesn’t care
Whether I am feeling
Pleasure or pain

It pumps into my heart
It slides upon my skin
It takes me over,
Without and within.

When I get his hunger,
This craving
This urge
All of my senses
Start tripping
My emotions in a surge
Like rushing water
Upon a calm lake
Oh, please, I beg,
Fulfill it…
For Heaven's
Sake!

It takes me over
Occupies my body
My brain
And I feel that if I don't
Scratch that itch soon
I will truly go insane

I look towards the heavens
I pray with all my heart
Please, help me to satisfy
This great gaping want..
For I am burning up
Inside my own strife
If I do not feed
This Lust
for Life

This morning,
upon waking
A different feeling was in the air
Something
was a-glow…but what?
A quick glance upon
The mirror
as I gazed upon my skin
It was shimmering with
Electricity
currents running,
thick and thin
up and down my body,
highlighting my passion
my most sensitive spots,
reverberating
turning delicate frequencies
into high voltage…

And every time
My thoughts slithered about
most alive,
like the bejeweled serpent
in a garden of lust,
of love
luscious
as orchards
of velvety fruit.
Thoughts
of your face
your touch
your skin upon mine….
A rush of sparks
igniting my spine.

I watched, as
all became alight,
My body a map
of countries,
gleaming into the night
of many tongues spoken,
of colors bursting in air,
of a melancholy broken
of the arc of a flare

I have become
a festival of lights.
The aurora borealis
drifting over me
like the rolling waves
of the most sensuous
explosion
ever

She comes alive
At night,
Huge cracks in the earth
Becoming fissures
Letting off steam
The rumbling
Getting louder
As she begins to explode
From the deepest
Inner core
Out into space dust
Liquid fire
Splashing through
Licking the surface
Forging precious stones
And minerals
Scorching poison plants
And deadly insects
In its wake
Enough!
She cries
Lifting her fist
To the blackened
Skies
And here it comes
Into the black
The Northern Lights
Are out again
Blinding incandescence
Blazing through the canopy
Of stars and nebulas
Of supernovas
She has become
Her own stellar explosion

As the cosmos
Flies through
Her fingers
Hair streaming,
She throws back her head
***** in the air
Breathes the coolness
Of celestial magic
Into her cells
The call of life force
Clanging inside her,
The sound of galactic bells

The entire Milky Way
Seems to flow
in her bones
her blood stream is already
pulsing at the speed of light
comets speed up in her mind
as she dreams
of new possibilities
Her heart is a bolide
that is on its way
to explode

After so many years
Of just being
****** into someone else's
Vortex
So many years
just wanting to survive
That's it,
Say the stars..
Sweet Woman.
Pay heed.
It's your time to be
Alive
Sept 30 2015

Once a tiny bud
Who grew outside of her protected liquid garden
Into a flowerburst of colors
Ultra-hued light
A taste of the divine
flowing from the heaven of her scent
as I hold her and inhale
I feel my own creation and hers mingling,
with the beat of my womb.
Each day,
so many colors, growing in intensity
Each day
so much depth unfurling from within
And with that earthsong, song of whales and mermaids,
a  gorgeous iridescence
That bestows light upon me
With its transcendant holiness
I know I am thus twice blessed:
A  starsong of delight
Who blesses and re-blesses her own miracle
of creation.
My own joyful garden, both in
And out of water
Able to burst up and out,
Seed by seed by seed.
And I wish to explode with it.
For now, I take a breath.
I have. I hold.
We glow.

I'm hanging out
our ***** laundry
tonight.
Sticks and stones
and broken bones.
Words actually do stain
as my whites mix with colors
and flow through the air,
pegged down to the last insult.
The best stain remover could be love.
But we've got a really
tough collection,
here tonight.
Despite the hot water wash, those
hard-to-get spots are
still there.
And my brain and heart are
being tumble-dried
the heat, the harsh words
washing out my pride.
My outs are in, my ins outside.
The world's a-tumble
As we wear the cloth down
to the last few threads.
As usual, we forgot
a good dose of softener
to make mellow
the words as they jump
from  our tongues
and enter our heads.
I would save my heart
if I could save yours, too
But it's just all spinning too fast,
What on earth
Shall we do?
We'll just have to hang it up as it is.
Let the world see
that there is no perfection
Let those dulled brights
be a kind of reflection.
Perhaps next wash will be better.
We'll know by then
what to use.
Perhaps love will take over,
rekindle the blown-out fuse.
Right now I'm just gonna
curl up in this
basket. Wait for the
stormy cycles to end.
One thing's for sure.
We must clean up our act
Lest the cottons unravel
We must sew up each tear
Before our hearts start to travel
We must take care of the frayed silks and satins
the polyester
before they are beyond any repair.
Tend to those stains,
Straighten each snare.
Take my love
In a many-hued heap
Smelling of sweet soap
Warming your cheek.
A leap of faith
A dash of desire
Let's wash out the pain
Rub away all ire.
Let's have a laundry party,
Tonight.
Naked on the clean bright sheets.
Let the kisses remove
the harshest of stains
Let caresses replace the words
of pain.
The only softener we'll use
Is the creaminess of tongues.
Let the world see
Our love, tonight.
Flowing on the line
for all to perceive.
Darling, we must give just to give
And then we'll
receive.

I feel
as though rays of light
are constantly
hitting me,
penetrating my soul
constantly beating me,
Sweetly
The winds are whipping up
Softly
getting stronger,
swaying me, pushing me
sweetly
There is a kind of tornado
Around my head
Whipping my hair
Into the air
And leaves in spinning energy
Invisible, but as strong
As a freight train
sweetly
I am twirling
My heart beating faster
Not sure how much
Longer I can keep
my feet
upon the  ground

The weather has gone crazy.
I am blinded
By the light
My heart is beating quickly
Light turns to darkness
And blackness turns to bright

And as the tornado begins
I am swept
Off my feet,
with no idea how
This came to be
And no desire
to retreat.
So, I say:
Bring it on, fair winds
Whip it up.
I am ready.
Inside, my heart
Beats in its
Fullest form
And I am ready
For a perfect
Storm

What is this fire
Stirred up from within?
From deep inside
the embers of my soul
my heart is restless.

Here, with the children;
Motherly duties abound.
Take this bring that what is this
Can you help me?
Can I have…?
It is true:
My love for them holds
No bounds.
It is unlimited,
No matter what they need
Or demand

Yet
My soul, forever, wild,  
wanders through thickets
Of bush, my hair a-tangle
As I slip through
deserted forest
Through endless tundra
Moss tickling my toes
I do not even feel the cold.
I am in a swirling array
Of bright clean snow
Icy energy
That fills me up
Makes me glow….
Indeed, I have reached
The land of the seals and whales:
My own polar plateau.

Oh yes, my skin turns to ice
And my eyelashes frozen
Fingers numb
In  this deep freeze I have chosen.
I  lie, spread out
Upon the sheet of soft
White that surrounds me
A freezing sea that buoys me up
Like a babe in the womb
******* in the nourishment
of glacial waters
and gelid floes
the icicles forming around my toes.

And all the while,
inside me, the fire burns and burns
My heart upon a skewer,
turns and turns
I am simply ignited
By my own inner flame
One I cannot put out
Even if I wished
I am illuminated from within
Becoming cooked
inside my own skin…

Help me, great powers above
goddesses of fire and brimstone
Cool me
let the icy waters trickle down
to my deep
quivering spots
Let the smoke be gone
Let me dive into icy waters
And refresh my soul

For now,
I sit here, upon the sofa
Staring into space
House asleep.
My thoughts my own.
Incantations up and out
As my soul clamours and
Shouts.
It will be better
In the morning's
Glow.
I sleep
With incandescent
colors about my head
Like dreamy auroras
Surrounding my bed
My hands
Holding
My beating heart
Pumping
Flowing
Somehow whole
In all my parts.

Slowly
I will unveil you
Like the peelings
an onion,
bittersweet juices
flowing with each
layer

I will,
as if a handmaiden,
Be there
To remove
the armor
of your battles
Ceremony-like,
In gentleness,
without hurting you
and lead you to the bath.

I will coax you out
Like a delicate stamen
From the petals
That surround your
Aching heart.

If you retreat
I will give you some space
For I know that
You will come to me
Like a fragile night creature
Afraid of the sun
I will persuade you
To check the air
To realize that your secrets
Are safe with me

I will encourage
You to come forth
And take you
Into my arms
No matter what
secrets you hold
Whether dark,
twisted  or lost
I can take it
For my heart is warm
And I am wise beyond my years
Come now, hush
Let me help you
Release your fears

Sometimes,
in the Land of Dreams
I can see my own karma
a flicker
of flame
like those ashes that shoot up
from a summer bonfire.
Tiny lick of a second
Before it fades
I reach out to capture it
like a firefly in a jar,
But with a kiss of white heat
It is gone.

Sometimes
in another land
I am an archeologist
digging deep into the Earth
uncovering secrets
revealing artifacts.
Looking for the bones
of my past existence.
Searching for selves
I cannot remember
In order to  hold them
Up to the
Light.
Then after digging,
behold the curious sight:
Me, on the earth, on my knees
mouth open in amazement…
for instead of bones
I have found fire opals
slipping and sliding through my fingers
Cool and smooth
glowing in the night
their brilliant iridescence
lighting up my palms
like a dance of fireflies.

And then,
A most peculiar event;
A hot crimson glow
Emanates from inside, above
And below


Could it be?
Is this real?
I check once, then twice
Yes, my very bones
have turned into opals
Making me gleam from within
Sending out messages of light
Into the full dark
Of the deepening night
Trying to catch a signal
in the air
crackling along those roots
hardwired within .
Roots, like bones.
Growing deep into the earth
where precious stones reside
I am at a loss for words,
just feelings now
and have completely
forgotten my pride.

And  I stand there,
in contemplation,
all lit up from within
radiating light
unto every direction...
I think:
"This is the place to begin."

And all at once
in the blink of an eye
the opals pour from me
right out
And as those fine stones
slip from my bones
I know I have changed
both within
and without
the fire implanted inside
never to go out

Rainbows of light
that's what I'm sending you
Each color
penetrates
each chakra
cleansing and strengthening
re-filling with light
and purity of spirit.
Each color magnifies its healing property:
Violet, lucidity of connectedness
the channel ever-clear
creativity always flowing.
You know yourself and always will.
Indigo, clarity of mind's eye
that third eye that you so allow to see
positive and true
Deep ocean blue
for communication in tongues
only for the benefit of the soul
for expression of the outpouring of spirit
releasing the burdens of your heart
as unexpected challenges arise.
Verdant green, like the jungles of your heart
Wild and untamed yet ever vast in gentleness
overflowing with love
balancing you into harmony's swing
serenity's caress soothing your soul
Sunlight yellow
right in your solar plexus
shining as a sun lights up from within
allowing you to trust
and re-trust your gut feelings
your inner wisdom alight.
Orange, pure glow of fire,
waiting to burst forth
from bud to flower
for femininity to unfurl,
both tender and fierce
as the lioness knows to be.
For joy to envelope every cell of you
every fraction of who you are and will be.
Finally, red , embers aglow
flames dancing
flames from which your strength
and vitality emerge
the source of your courage
in this battle.
And so, my fellow warrioress,
I send you rainbows.
To buoy you up
To thread you with light
to match, cell for cell,
the strength and healing
in colors.
I stand by you as we wave our flags
as we run through the
wilds in our battle cry
I am with you all the time, every hour
of the universe
silent like the huntress
stalking its prey,
tender as the mother
with babe to the breast
fierce enough to stave off the enemy
Standing at your side
Ready to catch you, if needed
Ready to help you generate rainbows of your own.
The power, my love,
is within your fingertips
within your smile
within each stunning
beat of your heart.
Rise up, and allow it
to weave through
the mosaic
of you,
a rich tapestry that spills unto the sacred plain
You,
my rainbow,
my light.

She has had enough
Of looking through the keyholes
of her own apologies
observing  silently
like the tiniest of dust particles
that nobody truly sees
She has had quite enough
of being that shadow that lurks within her own soul
She is sick and tired of the flag of "sorry"
Flapping high above the breeze while she is stuck
down below
just waiting as the world passes by
She has had it,
so sick of hiding within that small silent room
as the colors fly in whirls outside the tiny window
gracing the touch of her fingers
as the flutter of butterfly wings
She is ready to break down those walls
with the one sledgehammer
that she now
discovers is in the room
Rusty, standing up
In the corner
Unrecognizable but for the cloak of dust.

Dust and rust aside somehow,
she can feel it and it is unstoppable
pushing back the cobwebs in that prison cell
that she herself created
She is ready to unfurl
Fly out into the light
The horizons of her world
are already exploding
Shards of glass fly from it…
from where she's not sure
The walls pushed back through an invisible force
that simply was there
all along.
Here, feel that dance of multi-colored
Light
Coming in with each breath
As the heart and soul expand
Now there is no way
but up and out.
Timid hands open the door a crack
And like a magnetic force
She is almost ****** through
The time tunnel of freedom
Almost….
Like the tiniest of snails slides back into the
comforting shell
But then she wields it
taking charge.
Pride is on the shelf
and courage large
Sledgehammer roars through the air
and smashed walls
lead to freedom -
not slippery as the black ice she once tripped on
but as smooth and graceful as the stride
of a delicate wing
as it licks the sky
in her rising.