i like to haiku
but szymborska poetry
captures my heart now

and I’ve come to realize that if affection isn’t given freely, it’s not worth having
i’ve grown tired of driving down dead-end roads as if I could pave my own way out
and i’ve learned to know that it may look like love, but it feels a lot more like pain
and loving someone who doesn’t feel the same isn’t really love at all
and you could spend the rest of your life waiting for someone to realize they want you in theirs
and I knew, no matter what you said you were never going to be sure of me
so I’ll move move on with the realization that there are better things to come than what I’ve left behind
embracing the endings in what is not meant to be

there's a feeling i succumb to
it's murky dark straight pain

sometimes its fleeting feeling
stays in from the rain

i comfort it and welcome
provide cookies and hot tea

it makes itself a home here
deep inside of me
the murky dark straight pain
the one i come to be

did you know my heart for certain?
when you said you fell in love
or only did you see the parts of me
that i let visible through
late night car drives
lunch conversations
blue text message
and white crumpled bed sheets

when I was youngest, I wrote songs
made up melodies never heard before
and rhymed my schoolgirl crushes name.
For you- I wrote songs of our dog, and sung in the car,

when I was older, I stopped the music
but scribbled in diaries and typed poetry
on the computer you let me borrow.
You held me in your arms as I silently cried about the darkness and,

and now, I listen for the music
despite welling up every time it comes on
and I slowly carve poetry into notebooks with black ink.
I hope you're hearing my whispered words.

Writing grocery lists
Peaches, cream, and loving you
Sunday morning themes

I wanted friendship
I left you though I'm trying
but now, you won't speak