I long to move away.
From the fighting and the noise,
From the never ending mess,
Of clothes and dishes.
From responsibility and and rules
That restrict my life.

I long to move away.
From the sly stares and the snide comments,
Of the ones who are out to destroy.

I long to move away.
From their skeptical glances
And negative language
Which drives me insane .

I long to move away.
From the mirror;
From the tired eyes that judge me more than any others.
From the stranger that continues to stare back.

I long to move away.

I'm surrounded by a sea of people
As far as the eye can see
All flowing in the same direction
And just floating along, is me

I've been wading in this water
Letting it carry me any way
Not caring about which direction
And never having any say

After wading all this time though
My legs started growing tired
So finally it was time to choose
Which direction I desired

But the problem with floating along
Was that I never became aware
I wasn't really a part of the waves
I was just sort of...there

What I wanted didn't matter
The waves still moved as one
Whether I moved with or against them
Didn't matter in the long run

Then I thought I better get out
And give myself some time to think
But I couldn't see the shore anymore
And with that, I started to sink

Now I'm surrounded by a sea of people
As far as the eye can see
All still flowing in the same direction
But drowning in it, is me

"Every single day's the same
And in the end I'm all alone..."
"It doesn't matter what you say...
I feel pain you've never known"

This is how you view your life
As something worth throwing away
And all I wish for is to show you
How to view it a different way

You view the world in black and white
Without any specks of grey
You chose to focus on only the bad
Which causes your own dismay

The real world is full of color
It's a giant work of art
And though it has some shadows
That is just one little part

So when all you see is darkness
And you feel life's become too glum
Just remember that it won't last
And there are brighter things to come

There is beauty all around you
And every day is a new surprise
Full of joy, and people who care
You just have to *open your eyes

How would it affect your life
If someone said to you
You aren't good enough to succeed
At the thing you most want to do

Would you not let it get to you
And push forward to your goal
Not letting them have the satisfaction
Of having any form of control

Would it fuel you like a flame
And give you the drive to succeed
Working harder to prove them wrong
And having extra reason to proceed

Or would their words be like a dagger
And cut you to your core
And cause your mind to feel
Like its in the middle of a war

'Cause that's what your words did
They caused a battle in my brain
Continue to work towards nothing?
Or quickly abandon that train?

Part of me felt like six years of work
Should just be thrown away
I no longer had the confidence
To move forward in any way

But I knew I wouldn't be happy
If I chased any other dream
So I felt like I couldn't win
Life was a constant battle upstream

A year is how long it took
To repair what you destroyed
To put back pieces of myself
And remember what I once enjoyed

But now I'm ready to move on
And pursue the things I love
As for all your hurtful words...
I'm ready to rise above

I've always had a problem
With telling others how I feel
I try finding ways to express my thoughts
But instead I find more ways to conceal

I can never find the words to say
"Hey you're starting to drive me nuts"
Instead I keep it bottled up inside
Till I start to hate their guts

I yearn to admit my feelings for others
To say: "I am interested in something more"
To be able to open my heart to them
And say they are someone I adore.

I also wish I could call on others
When all I want to do is cry
But whenever people try to help
All I can ever do is deny

I want to be able to let people in
And to say what's on my mind
To answer all of their questions
And not keep my emotions confined

I wish I could do all these things
But instead it always goes wrong
I push everyone I love away
And they all feel strung along

So when I feel like I am alone
And like no one really cares
I know that it is my own fault
'Cause I'm "the one that never shares"

Not a single day goes by
That I don't reminisce
On the good times that we had
And all the things I miss

My head is full of memories
Of all the days we shared
Driving all over the city
And doing anything we dared

We used to talk all night long
About the future and the past
We dreamed of seeing the world
We thought the time we had would last

But the funny thing about time
Is that it really doesn't care
If it ruins all your plans
Or if it makes life seem unfair.

Our dreams did not come true
Because time just slipped away
Our lives were suddenly torn apart
And the future turned dark and gray

I have missed you every day since
And I will miss you till the end of time
Some people believe that you only get one...
And I think you might have been mine

So I'm making sure to tell everyone
"Make time for what matters to you"
Because we think that we have forever
But that really isn't true...

Today I finally let go
Of all the pain that you have made
The damage that you did
And the way I've felt betrayed

Today I finally let go
Of the overwhelming toxicity
The pain that over-took me
And of a life without simplicity

Today I finally let go
Of the doubts that filled my head
All the helplessness inside
The inability to move ahead

Today I finally let go
Of carrying around that fake smile
Plus all the weight of self enmity  
Which caused each step to be a trail

Today I finally let go
Of that devastating negativity
Feeling like I was worthless
And wanting so badly to flee

Today I finally let go
Of feeling like I couldn't be me.
Today I finally let go of you.
Today I am finally free.

I used to believe in destiny
I used to believe in fate
I thought I'd end up at just the right place
And everything would just be great

I used to believe in honesty
In speaking up for what you believe
I thought people would value the truth
I didn't think that they would leave

I used to believe in people
That deep down everyone is good
That's why violence, cruelty, and abuse
Were things that I never understood.

If there is good in everyone
Do people just choose the bad?
Do they decide that life is more fun
When your goal is to make others sad?

If being honest is always best
Then why does it create drama?
Arguments, attacks, and insults...
Why not save ourselves the trauma?

If there is really some higher plan
Why do so many people end up falling flat
People are bullied, abused, homeless
Tell me, what kind of master plan is that?

I used to believe in destiny
Maybe I was just naive
I used to believe in the good
Now I don't know what I believe.