These shoulders of mine are growing tired from my not growing wings
the anchors on my feet start to blister
Mister time is taking a ride
alive i am
everything is so very bland now and days
the polish is chipping off my claws
**** the feelings and knowledge is chipping from my head
why can't i write no longer
why can’t i feel no longer
did my hands fall off
did my head fall off
who am i

if it wasn't for the thrill or to even remotely feel
i wouldn't do drugs they ****

let me wash down those happy pills the hospital gave me
with a swig of numbness to my emotions only to make myself stable
to not feel
to not self sacrifice
to follow the systematic process that takes “time”
waiting and waiting for my wings to grow

I feel as though my time is fading fast
dispersing in the air like the smoke of a cigarette
which rests out  her crimson painted colored lips

Grandfather clocks hands grow tired from the constant
ticking of pointless bogus

Impulsive eyes and cracked smile bonded with band aids
and scars that will never fade the last blade my sight has laid upon
pressed firmly on the film of my skin
the ruby juice flows like a stream
going out like a light
the birds chirped and flowers bloomed
John Lennon rose from the grave and sang
“imagine”
and the world did live as one because i was none.

Dry eyes
Pink balloons
Satin sheets
Nothing is related to the other.
Nothing makes sense.
A thousand words are written
A million songs are sung.
The days are slowly churning, tic toc
Here comes another one.
Hello was for a moment
Goodbye will last forever
Yet inside this spec of time
Your face I still remember.
The way your auburn hair would fall
When you just arose from bed
Or how your smile lit the room
We had so many years ahead.
Staring down upon this stone
As the sunshine warms the day
I relive every moment
All the silly games we played.
Inside I'm numb to everything
I can't help but wonder why
We didn't get to live our life
Or why you had to die.
Teary eyes
Blue roses
Teacups
Nothing is related to the other
Nothing makes sense.....