I forgive you for growing up and leaving me behind
For being so cool you dont wanna hang out
I want you to forgive me too for the times I've let you down
All the shows and the drunken times
You have this bad memory cause you wanna forget all the abuse you experienced as a child
The only reason you were born was to be my friend
I asked for a sister, I was all alone
I know we don't see eye to eye
But I wish you'd call me to say hi
Not because you need me like the other guy
I feel used sometimes
But I forgive you once more and remember you're not alone
I went through the same things you did
I have the same struggles, my dear.

I cant believed you cared about how far I went
I cant believe you made a joke about everything I said
I dont understand the efforts you made
If my pants got ***** you didnt care
I kept over thinking these things in my head
Like a movie, like a story that never ends
But today is sunday and I still care
We never went fowards
We only went backwards
You said you didnt want trouble
Eventually i'll become a memory
This conection that felt so real
Wanting to move up but holding on instead
But you brought confusion
I sent you a video and a song
You never had time for them
Was it all in my head?
What went wrong started again
Its stupid I know, I only think about her

I feel terribly wrong
The moon doesn't shine
the planets are not aligned
My stomach sinks and I can't control
my heartbeat
Overclouded and no rain
Just a bunch of flying mistakes
I can't stay still, my feet run when I sleep
Courageous, I've been called
But murmurs of weakness I hear
And I feel like death is near
where can I find peace?
Where the leaves are colored
And the sea is aqua blue and the sun's rays are sharp
This palace is my solitude
This feeling is my prison
I can't escape it nor calm it down
It's tied to my veins

Heartbeat doesn't skip a beat
Remember I'm trying my best to not carry the weight
Don't think I don't care about your health
Please don't beat like the speed of light
I just wanna hide these feelings inside
I've been looking for help
Don't know what else to do
But please go back to your normal rhythm
I can't take it if you are not okay
I'll try to be calm and handle my thoughts
Ill the exercises like my doctor said
Please don't accelerate
This is not a race
I'm not in danger
I'm just stressed.

I gave you my whole soul
You gave me your broken pieces
You took a loan, you never paid it
It hurts to see you don't keep your word
Hello and goodbye that's all we ever say to each other
Please keep your promises or I'll die
Once and for all, please leave those vices behind
I keep holding on the past where you left me on the floor crying
Even if you said you were sorry, I keep it all inside
My head hurts today, and tomorrow and forever
I wanna cry cause it heals
My heart is so broken, I don't even know
I know life is short, but these emotions keep afloat
I can barely breathe, God, show me the way to heal
otherwise, I don't know how to live

This love is endless
The whirlwind that began
The sorrow that never left
I can't accept this kind of love
It breaks my heart and soul
I can't see clearly the road
I'm obsessed with this Venom of love
It's all the toxicity that I don't want
But that I know
You won't change me, I won't change you
We won't see what's in front of our eyes
Should I respond to your sorry's?
Or should I cry to myself at night
leaving behind this pain that tucks me in at night
My heart knows nothing
I can't trust it,
who will guide me through with this veil?

I clung to you, no matter how many fights we had
I know we aren't right for each other
But I didn't want to let you go, I wanted to take on whatever you gave to me
I thought this was true love, but from moments I had my doubts about you went back and forth
But the thought of missing you was stronger than a fort
We have so many things in common, I cherish your goodwill
But something was off, I knew it from the start
Was it your lack of concern, your critical words or even how you never watched the reruns?
We tried, we longed, we had enough time to decide if this was gonna work out.
I saw your insecurities from afar and I also saw mine.
Is it impossible for us to find common ground?
You were spontaneous, but I love to make plans
I feel bad to cause you  suffering but I tried
We just weren't on the same side
I hope I can let you go because I never loved you at all
You were probably right not to trust me cause I never brought you home