if you're not sorry, i'm not sorry.
let's get drunk. let's get ****** up. let's forget each other's names and call each other charles and maude for no good reason.
let's go swimming in the river and freeze our ***** off.

this world, this world, this world. it's too big for us and we love disappearing in it.
if you're not sorry, i'm not sorry.
we'll write a song and these will be the only words.
we'll sing it sweet and out of tune around a campfire and watch our friends kiss the wrong people.

i wanna die smiling. i don't care when. i just wanna.
promise me you won't be around when i get boring.
promise me we won't even talk about it when the time comes for us to leave each other.
one of us will wake up and we'll just feel it. we'll just know.

that's how i want this to go.
a song with only a chorus. no bridge, no fade out, just a steady tune that doesn't get tired.

keep driving.
i wanna know what the air smells like in nevada. i wanna see it all.
if you're not sorry, i'm not sorry.
let's stop talking. keep this song on, it's my favorite.

i will wrap my hands around each of my organs and rip them out one by one. i will call it poetry and make you watch. i will blame you for the mess. when it rains, i will take you out to taste the thunder with me. we will dance until lightning strikes the ground around our feet. we won't stop until the flames kiss our skin. when you complain about the way your toes burn, i will convince you that this is called love, and you will whisper an apology into my lips. i will be thinking of metaphors when you touch me. and when the winds become too strong, when it is all screaming chimes and unhinged doors, i won't stay to clean up the mess. i will pack my things while you beg me not to go. all of my poems have sharp teeth and they are a warning that i do not do anything in a whisper. no. i am the type of person who comes in with a first aid kit. just in case you hurt yourself while loving me. just in case it almost kills you.

You were always too good to me. I was a hurricane, a nasty one too. I ripped your heart of its roots and flooded your soul with my absence; a tornado of emotions that destructed everything in my path and flash floods were always spilling down my cheeks. You kissed me everyday and told me you would never leave. Remember that one time you sat up with me on my bed all night and rubbed my back just because I was sad? I remember. Remember that one time you woke me up because you had made the perfect cup of tea and you thought I would like it? I remember. It's all the small, little memories that are my favorite. And even though we have both grown so different (i grew my hair out and you cut all of yours off) I still love you. I love you I love you I love you. I miss you, too. But I know you are busy and having a good time with your new friends so I'll leave you alone and take another drink of this whiskey that tastes like you.

sometimes i put on red lipstick
and go nowhere
sometimes i wish you were here
take me out and paint the town
the color of my heart
did you know i've always
loved the way you say hello
these are things you should know about the two of us
sometimes i think
there must be a couple dancing
in a little snowglobe somewhere
and i bet they look just like we do on these nights
three am and nothing to do
break out your dancing shoes
i've heard there's a hell of a party somewhere
and it starts after we get there

In my dream, we were ghosts together. Not really sure how we found each other, not really sure how long we'd been floating past streetlights and bus stop benches, not really sure how we got this way. We didn't talk about things that happened in the past, or how everything around us was changing faster than we could hold on to them, how their shapes shifted before we could get a good grip. I cried on your shoulder when you finally said "Baby, I think we're dead." We both already knew but we weren't ready to admit it. I guess we were just stalling, wrapping time around our necks as if the seconds would choke us back to life, but it was not the noose we were looking for. You said "At least we have each other." So we forgot our names and emptied our organs to fill them with forever. After that, time was water slipping through our fingers, time tangled knots in our hair. We traced love letters in the sky with time and watched them dissipate to nothingness, into thin air. It was all we could do to hold on to each other. And we still fought. Eternity was a rushing river we waded through waist-deep, pulling us apart and back together again, our limbs weaving, interlocking, before we broke off and swam in opposite directions. You were the first hopeless thing I wanted to believe in. You stepped inside me and held my lungs so I could laugh again, you called it home. When I missed things like coffee or rain, you sang until I couldn't remember ever being alive, and we were happy again. When I woke up, I felt older. It smelled like something had died in my bed and I realized that I am forgetting what it's like to be alive. I'm afraid we're becoming ghosts. But not like we were in my dream. I wanted to die with you, but not like this. I'm not happy anymore and I don't think you are either, maybe this thing's not working out. Maybe this is as far as it gets for you and me. Maybe time has been writing us love letters back all along, but we don't look up at the sky anymore. We don't step in puddles of rainwater, we don't know how to swim anymore.