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Jul 2023 · 318
Singsong
Jamie L Cantore Jul 2023
The caterpillar walks alongside groovy stems; so what do you mean?
    the banjo plays on to rusty hymns; what is that supposed to mean?  the plainsong of those birds of a feather upends: excuse me, come again please?
   but nobody, no one;  ever… told you you had
to comprehend. Oh fam, you’re soo mean!
So you can take your suit just in case,
and I can take in the
rain and coat  my little dream. What, why? You don’t mind.  and I don’t mind metaphors
to explain lyrics across…  the bard. You’re speaking in riddles, Man! So what is Poetry
to me, if I can’t take
it’s license and play with my words, words you would discard, I call  deuces wild, yeah my friend. Nah, it’s not like that at all child. Yes it is. No it’s not. Yes it is. No it’s not! And that’s the way I feel y’all. I just think a thought and jot.

Jot it all down. Jot it all down. Jot alllllll DoWn… when I think a thought.
Totally messing around here, I love to explain my writings!
Jamie L Cantore Oct 2018
Available on Amazon.com for $15 for paperback and  $6 for the Kindle version.
Sep 2018 · 1.1k
Mightier Than The Sword
Jamie L Cantore Sep 2018
Allow it in -aye, 'till when?
All at such cost, none are lost
Lo! then, what is foretold men,
Fiery talks or the coldest frost,
And breath & word alike swept
Away again, swept away in vain
A breadth as wide as death, except
We sustain all humanity, the refrain;
Yet forlorn we are in an age torn -
Such a number high of tongues cry
For mourn dost they must the morn,
Nary a ryhme of these words be lie.
The world can sever, and whosoever
Is taught to pass or stay brave & fast
Shall be learnéd & it prove no effort
If it be times as is the last that's cast.
Victory is what the sword can afford
Yet a poets pen can lord their sword.
May 2018 · 415
Masters Of English Poetry
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
is the title of my latest book. It is a compilation of strictly English poets dating back to the 1800's. My favorite writer William Shakespeare is not included because I wanted a theme of writers living around the same time as one another. It includes the works of brilliant English writers such as William Wordsworth, his dear friend Percy Bysshe Shelley, Samuel Taylor Coleridge,  Alfred Lord Tennyson, and John Keats. It is written in the original true English fashion, back when the word proved rhymed with loved and wasn't just a sight ryhme. I plan on compiling another book of strictly my favorite poetesses such as Emily Dickinson, Plath, and the like. The Kindle edition is priced at $7, but like my other books I'll probably run it for free for a few days for promotional purposes. The paperback is priced at $6.25 and is not eligible for free promotional offers.
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
It's available on Amazon for $3. Kindle edition only. 79 color pics of my Digital and traditional Art. Lots of Abstract and Nature works.
May 2018 · 571
Revision Update
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
I re-released my new book with revisions and added poems also. The title is Poems of Expression and it will be available for free starting tomorrow. After the promotion is over in a few days the price will be $6 + tax. This is the Kindle edition. The paperback is also available for  $11 + tax and also shipping if you don't have Amazon Prime. Just go to Amazon and type in Jamie Cantore to see my available titles. My short cautionary tale The Journal of Graham Keats will be available again once I add to the story. The cost will be $5 for the paperback.
May 2018 · 297
Check out my books
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
Go to Amazon and type in Jamie Cantore. All of my titles will appear. My latest book Poems Of Expression Revised Version Of A Bit Of My Poetry is available on Amazon for free until May 15th.
May 2018 · 404
A New Book!
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
Check out my book Poems Of Expression: Revision Of A Bit Of My Poetry. It's available on Amazon for free until May 15th. Go to Amazon and type in Jamie Cantore then select the title I mentioned (Kindle edition.) Word Wise enabled, so if you don't know a word or phrase just highlight it and it will define or explain it. *Update: available in paperback also.
May 2018 · 291
I Have Published 3 Books
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
Go to Amazon and type in Jamie Cantore. My book A Bit Of My Poetry is available in paperback and a Kindle edition. The Journal Of Graham Keats is currently unavailable, but I will re-publish it with revisions and additions soon -paperback only.  It's a short cautionary tale. Dristig Trekk, my Minor Epic Poem, is available in paperback and a Kindle edition. Please share. Thank you!
#published #finally!
May 2018 · 816
Untitled
Jamie L Cantore May 2018
This book represents the majority of my Poetry since childhood. I hope you enjoy it.
Apr 2018 · 258
The Journal of Graham Keats
Jamie L Cantore Apr 2018
Available in paperback on Amazon for $5. Written by me last year, it's a short cautionary tale full of suspense and intrigue. Please check it out. If you're an Edgar Allen Poe fan you'll enjoy it.
Jamie L Cantore Jan 2018
It's not of consequence who you are, you live: fly quickly... amidst the fields by my gentle vault: trample not the daisies where I consult, hearing the climbing vine and ivy.

I watched you stay. The singing dove did moan. Yet don't chase it from my tomb. To bid me well, save its freedom. Life is great: oh let it fly oh darling one.

It was under the mistletoe at the door, on the cusp of love you died, a maiden right-so dear-already far from thee I did love tonight.

So my lids closed out the good light. And here I stay alas for evermore -with angels beings deaf to dreams- in the remembrance of Night.
Jamie L Cantore Jan 2018
Had we but experience, honor, and time; this diffidence Dear is no crime. We could rest and ponder which way to stroll and waste our everlasting day. Thou by the mountains sides old, should gemstones find in fortunes told. I by a tide of slumber did complain. I loved you long before the flood, the falling rain; and you still refuse until the spreading of the news.

My rose heart shouldst grow larger than empires, and you know a millenium should go to praise your fires, and in thine eyes do gaze, and stoke. Three centuries to admire your rising chest, but eternity to the rest; an eon at last to each part, and the final age to cast your heart. For Darling you've earned this state, and I love not spurned at a lower rate.
Jan 2018 · 489
Dear And Fair
Jamie L Cantore Jan 2018
Depart, sweet rose -
inform her that hast her hours and me, that somehow she knows, when I compare her to thee, how lovely and darling she seems to be.

Inform her that is young, and shy's to have her sweets espied, that hadst thou sprung in lands where no men abide, thou must have unsung died.

Little is the worth of graces from the sun retired: allow her come forth, allow herself to be desired, and not rise so to be admired.

Then fade - that she the known destiny of all that's rare may see in thee; how tiny a grain of time they share that are so vastly dear and fair!
Jan 2018 · 328
Angelic
Jamie L Cantore Jan 2018
Lying on the kip in the night I saw my dear hover over my bed, bloodless as the most pale lily head, soft-skinned with naked neck to bite, too waxen for a blush and too flush for white, but perfectly toned without white or red.

And her entire face kissed by my mouth, and all her body watched by mine eyes; the tender hands and eyes of fire, the shaking  limbs hotter than the south, the flowing wings, the lithe thighs, and burning soul of my heart's desire.
Jan 2018 · 1.1k
The Axiom of Love
Jamie L Cantore Jan 2018
Loving in axiom, and eager in Poetry heart to show, that she may reap some comfort of my pain: joy may animate her to read, which may allow her know, understanding may charity win, and charity beauty obtain, I sought right words to draw the darkest sight of woe, surveying devices fine, her thoughts to entertain: often tossing others' wits to check if then it's flow some new and healthy rains would come upon my desert brain. But words sprung stooping forth, needing devices stay, Device, a poet's young, escaped Knowledge's blows, and strangers feet seemed obstacles in my way. Thus great with kin to speak, and defenseless in my throes, gnawing my fugitive pen, chastising myself for spite, Twit, said my inspiration to me, peer into thine soul and write!
Mar 2017 · 508
Small Hours
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
I promise you this, lil Cupid, by your quivers, I woe not if the arrow injures, my heart seared, ruined by
such wound: however remote the years soon
to pass or that which came, never a lass by any name could rightly be aware the stain nor such feasting on my hearths flame by gluttonous Love, a heart in chains; and do consider the purity born from martyrdom. That which cures and calms the feeling of agony, to the point it be hardly ever felt, a mere hinting at pain dealt in only the slightest degree. No! That which tortures my one and only spirit and body, just that fear is what truly is the dismay heralding my imminent decease and decay: for my fierce fire may be but the only flame which burns so in this cold and cruel world I tread all alone as it turns, in confused hopefulness I yearn to see you deliver -and impatiently I lie awake at night waiting for her.
Mar 2017 · 876
Hillside Grave
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
In a faraway place, his grave
Resides on a hill by the wave;
Inland of the sea he lies alone,
Seeking sun. His name in stone,
Carved deep to resist age & decay.
The years pass so quickly away,
So his grave is long forgotten now,
The visitors all have passed & how;
And the birds have become so rare
In their passing steps by him there.
Mar 2017 · 421
Grow My Love
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Ripen into my lover, O Dear!
And seek the primrose path,
One placed in a field so near,
Mountains covered with grass.

Do not let go the will you need
To push your petals wide ope,
Break the chains and be freed,
Not rest within the binding coat.

I will tend to you at morning,
I will tend to you at eventide,
Just promise me you're​ turning
Into the love I need deep inside.
Fantasy about the ability to grow a lover upon a vine and care for her like the rose she was always meant to be, but not rush her in any way to wrap around me.
Mar 2017 · 608
Sleep Now Love
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Tenderly, permit us repose Love in serenity deep,
as thus, boughs bending well above whorl their
shades o'er us. Let's unite our hearts as one, minds'
and souls' ecstasies, hedge twain the buds' nebulous
energies. Veil your eyes and soul at rest, released
from all trifling endeavor, arms folded o'er your
beating breast, dispel proud avidity forever.

Let's bow then, by and by, to the winds, tranquil
and sweet, as their wafted lullaby breathes on
golden wheat at your feet. And when darkness
does fall from the soaring trees, darkening, in
the warblers sweet call -our pain will slowly sing.
Mar 2017 · 434
Paradise Denizens
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Small was our pretty little hut,
The tallest posy leaned on the
Casement. We heard at faint mid-
Day, the waves quietly whispering.
In the free air, flourished the
Buds; and on the trestles twined
The Carolina jessamine as the
Countryside vivified each eye
With each passing day, in our
Rose fresh thoughts replayed
                            
-Forever.
Mar 2017 · 459
I Know Not
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
I know not where you bestow;
Which ghost has passed the row
Of roses in your charms & deeds?
Each posy-as in our Winter-sleeps.

I know not where your atoms stray;
In bright whits of a Summer's day?
Yet in true piety, Heaven made rare,
Every strand of your lovesome hair.

Where do the stars sit, if not found
In those spheres of blue all round?
I do not pretend to know she's there.
She's somehere, but I know not where.
Mar 2017 · 677
A Pixie Named Stick
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
At night in the hamlet, a noise broke the silence. A quite small pixie named Stick
Was napping in the forest just round midnight or so, she fancied she heard
Her name being called thru the wood by some lover. She sat there by her snail shell hut like an intoxicated hobbit, then she crept on down to the dale, and spied
Wee little fireflies dancing in the air like nightlights flown by daring pilots with no particular place to go.
Mar 2017 · 402
On The Morrow
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Ah! if my youth were a perdurable
trance! My reality not roused till a
sun's expanse; where an aeon could prompt the first blush. Perhaps, though
those extended dreams were flush
with futile grieving, yet better than
algid facts of Existence, & relieving
kindled verve, to whose heart just
is, and always has since birth; still
within the pleasing earth, a snarl
of longing rage from her surge.

But should it come to pass--that
vagary unceasingly continuing--
as trances have always passed
in my youth--could it be this
winnowing revelled in the sky
in dreams in their bright truth
found lost within a great lie
in dreams of happier times?
I shall slumber a bit longer,
to seek out the scatterings of
Life's little difficult answers:
but I age all the while I sleep on
hopes and wake I still anchored.
Mar 2017 · 395
The Awakening
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
By avenues vague and secret,
visited by devils and regret,
whither the Wraith of Manes
stands firm and tall and reigns,
thither in the dark acres stead;
and like a vapor inside my head,
lingers there to haunt and spread.

Abysmal troughs and a great deluge,
and rifts, and dens, and silva's huge,
with silhouette's none can recover
for the weeps that pour all over;
ridges plunging into Nevermore,
into waters devoid of any shore;
swells that spasmodically aspire,
upsurging in welkins full of fire.

For in my soul regrets are legion,
but it's an irenic and placid region-
because the wraith which did haunt,
is now seen as wispy, thin, and gaunt.
I wend my way straight through him,
and I refuse to ever again view him.
The Wraith of Manes is now banished,
from terrible dreams, now vanished.
Mar 2017 · 474
Ground Control
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
I stand upon a scraper of the skies;
Try to overcome a fear of heights...
Born within me; irrational perhaps:
But I wasn't born with wings or *****,
So I don't think it so irrational a fear.
Yet, I stand at the edge way up here
To overcome the fear in question...

I fell. I always said I'd make a
                            good

                  **IMPRESSI­ON
Mar 2017 · 518
Ancestral Inflorescence
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Catkins of a Willow & Birch, whipped
By winds that whistle while in search
Of clouds and thistle to be outstripped
By shouts & bellows to a billow of Earth

Drooping stems, to spread their pollens Amongst their kin by winds that whistle, Whipping them & thistle in the dozens-
Catkins of a Willow & Birch, search Earth

*For their distant cousins.
Mar 2017 · 434
Sey Wuht?
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
ahy dih-zahyn tuh dih-seev yee
bahy klev-er mahsk awr klohk.

dohnt kahrp, need-l yohr bel-free,
ahy chohz tuh doo it az mahy johk.

sey yee fig-yer suhch fuhn-ee awl-soh,
yee shal uh b-teyn ey smahyl tuh goh.
Mar 2017 · 287
Everything And Nothing
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
I am in everything.
I am in nothing.
What am I?
Mar 2017 · 332
Shhh... It's Another Riddle
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
If you have me, you want to
Share me. If you share me,
You no longer have me.
Mar 2017 · 528
Skywatcher
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Solemn at sundrop, upon the heavy Terrain I mused,
My sour heart was bittering; a heady
Moon I perused.
Peer & whisper Sorrow to you, Moon,
Sigh for sigh gave
I, as vespers weary into dimmet Soon.
Tears upon grass
That wail, Aye! sparkl'd by 
 Dim lit ray: but
Steeped in my way,
I mused on the abject fools
Which so do pass
O'er bleakness. Alas!
One with I claim I!
As she clearly befell,
Nightfall raised her well!
Mar 2017 · 712
Nameless
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Echoes Life, that once felt from light,
Unduly ample for my individual sight,
A genuine Self-a particle ungrounded-
Each we see, all tinctures of all shade
By interposition of calignosity made,
Remain it veritably Life unbounded?
Ev'ry thought, woe, joy of live breath,
Is it stronger than inevitable Death?
              
       -Life is Death, as yet unfounded.
Mar 2017 · 284
Logic Question 2
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
You are in in a haunted jailhouse, when the storm outside knocks out the electricity. Just as your turn on your flashlight, you are seized by two ghost wardens. You are treated very poorly.

They offer you a choice of being decapitated, shot in the head, or strapped into the electric chair and executed painfully.

Which would you choose?
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
Word that means important AND can
Be broken down into 4 words which
Are important instructions to one's
  attorney
Ask and I’ll answer
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
I walk into class.
I am alone there...
Because I like
To get to places
Early. I wait for
Group to begin.
People start
Rolling in.

We all all say
Hi and Hello
How are you
And you and
You? All is
Well we each
Say out of
Politeness:
But really,
None of
Us are.
That is why
We attend
Group.

Each of us
Are damaged
In some way,
Or just have
A void in our
Lives. We each
Have a diagnosis,
Or two, or so.

So class begins
Late every day
Like clockwork,
And then it
Takes the entire
Session for one
Person to say
A few things
About themselves,
And we have
A few moments
To make comments
If the counselor
Allows any
Opinion but
Her own be
Expressed.

And then it's
Break time
And we all
Smoke our
Chosen
Poison because
It is scientifically
Proven that most
People with say,
Schizophrenia
Or Schizoaffective
Disorder or Bipolar
Disorder, (any type,)
Are addicted to nicotine
Because our nicotinic
Receptors are out of
Whack.

Then it's back to class,
Which starts late again
And another person
Gets a moment to share
Their uncertainty about
Their lives. And I have
To sit there with the
Answer in my head,
Because I am not
Allowed to speak
Anymore. I was
Told one too many
Times by the
Class that I
Make too
Much sense
To be a group
Member, and
Should teach
The class.

The counselors
Always hate
That sort of
Thing. They really
Hate it when you
Psychoanalyze
Them. Group
Is helpful, despite
It's many short-
Comings. Well,
I guess I better
Continue going,
Because I don't
Want to miss
Out on Jack's
Repeated *******'
About how Jill
Won't listen,
Or how Humpty
Can't lose weight
Despite a balanced
Diet. You know the
Type... A Diet Coke
In one hand, and a
Snickers bar in the
Other. We are all        
     UnBaLaNcE
                           d.
Mar 2017 · 348
Riddle For You All
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
What tastes better than it smells?
*Hint: The answer is not corn chips.
Mar 2017 · 888
Rainbow Multiplication
Jamie L Cantore Mar 2017
32 × 21=?

First digit of first #
Multiplied by first
Digit of last number= 6

2nd digit of 1st #
Multiplied by last
Digit of last number = 2

Now multiply 1st digit
3 by ( last digit) 1 & it =3
2nd digit of 1st # which
Is 2 × 1st digit of 2nd #
Which is 2 & you get 4
Add 3 +4
=7
Insert 7 between the 6 and 2
You get 672
32×21=672
Kid stuff.
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
60% of 42=?

60% = 50% + 10%

50% of 42 = 21

10% of 42 = 4.2

21+4.2= 25.2

So, 60% of 42 = 25.2
Feb 2017 · 392
Mathematical Enigma
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
Many of you may remember my Mathematical Poetry from a couple of years ago. Here's one I've never posted.

A series of 8 (1's) × a series of 8 (1's)
= 123456787654321

A series of 7 (2's) × same ÷ (2×2)
= 1234567654321

A series of 6 (3's) × same÷ (3×3)
= 12345654321

A series of 5 (4's) × same÷ (4×4)
= 123454321

A series of 4 (5's) × same ÷ ( 5×5)
= 1234321

A series of 3 (6's) × same ÷ (6×6)
= 12321

A series of 2 (7's) × same ÷ (7×7)
= 121

And finally, 1 (8) × same ÷ ( 8×8)
= 1
Simplified for convenience.
Feb 2017 · 1.4k
Palindrome Play
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
Saippuakivikauppias  -World's longest palindrome
Finnish language: Means soap stone vendor.


First ladies rule the
State, and state the        -
                        Word
                      palindrome
Rule: Ladies first.

Racecar -Palindrome

A man, a plan, a canal; Panama. -Palindrome Phrase.
Feb 2017 · 991
Stepped On A Landmine
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
This morning, I stepped on a landmine.
I tried using a twig to clean each line,
I spent a while, a very very long time,
Using a twig to depoop the very bottom
Of my shoe, & my dog thought, (Got'em.)
So as he's laughing at my bad situation
I used my noggin and vented frustration.
Found his brush & he stopped rollin'
As I scraped away what was holdin'
Fast to my left shoe. The moment; golden.
Don't worry, only half the story is true.
Feb 2017 · 430
School Daze
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
In tenth grade myself and nine other students were sent to the principals office to be dealt with due to too many tardies.

As I waited for it to be my turn to give my excuse, I listened to the other excuses so as to make certain I didn't use the same one someone else used. The excuses were many
and lame.

Finally, I was next in line and the principal
Said in frustration, "No excuses are going to be sufficient unless it has to do with the torrential rains we've been having lately.

I had my excuse! I told him, well I had every intention to get to school early this morning. I woke up early and everything
was going according to plan without a hitch. Then, as Fate would have it, I turned the key in the ignition and the car wouldn't start. And it was due these torrential rains lately.

He asked, "What does your car not starting have to do with the rain?"

I said, "The **** thing must have been flooded!"

He laughed and excused me.
True story.
Feb 2017 · 524
Midnighters
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
I was there within a lil tropic dale,
Marrow of one lil 'ol stealthy vale,
I hearkened of a grand titanic tale
'Midst two Midnighters loud speil.
The spat was pitiless & oh! strong;
Faint 1st was their spoken old song,
Then harsh as each bird had swelled,
To rage the strife away which dwelled.

The warbler led the great speech,
Easeful in a nook of a wide beech;
Perched on a pulchritudinous bough,
About her were burgeons florid now,
Utterly in a downy, substantial hedge,
Intertwisted with buds and new sedge.
Happier she was for having the sprays,
Sing she did for gladness in many ways.

Yet was there an old prong lying beside,
Wherefrom an old owl came and cried;
The branch w/ climbing vine overgrown,
And here this owl sojourned quite alone.
The warbler did after not so long  espied,
And looked upon her w/ confuted pride.
Many were her scoffings 2 the jejune owl,
For to the warbler was she loath'd & fowl.

The owl stayed in her place till eventide,
Not a moment more did she there abide,
So thrived her ***** with flowing wrath
That she could hardly even regain breath;
Say that I grasped thee in my sharp claw,-
Would that I may do so here in this shaw!
And thou wert torn from off your spray,
Then we shall see who sings a nights lay.

And with that... the warbler stole away.
To hang her shingle and head in shame.
Feb 2017 · 249
No Help Wanted
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
My friend said his girlfriend was proving
Difficult to satisfy. He said he tried Everything to get her where she wanted
To be, but she just wasn't reaching the
Heights she desired. I offered to help. I
Said she likes it when you...


For some reason, he got upset and threw
Me out.

What did I say?
Not a true story.
Feb 2017 · 321
A "Funnier" Musing
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
A woman leaves her hormone
Pills uncapped on the
Kitchen counter
And her female
Pussycat
Gets a hold
Of them.

When she's
Walking back
To her
Apartment she
Sees all the
Tomcats
In
The neighborhood
Walking in circles
And meowing.

Her pussycat was in
The window
Teasing
The houndogging
Tomcats
By
Standing
On
Her
Hind legs
&
Twisting
Her knobs
Two
By
Two
By
Two.
Feb 2017 · 307
A Funny Musing
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
Imagine a man dies from an overdose of ******. His ****** expression is too horrid too have an open casket funeral... But they have no choice, the lid won't shut. Food for thought.
The coroner's report read as follows:
The man with the *****
is now a goner.
Feb 2017 · 528
What Do You Say?
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
Are Professions the opposite of
Confessions? My shrink said perhaps we can deal with this in other sessions.

What is a fession?
I think this a good
Question.

Is it better to be *******
Than it is to be ****** on?

Is it pronounced *** can,
Or as I like to say puh kahn?


After all, I thought a *** can was
Something you would assign
Everyone on a long trip to make
Better time.


Wouldn't it be cool if dinosaurs
Were mammals and had fits
Over which had the tiniest
Arms, but yet had the biggest
                          ****?

T-Rex. Yes, definitely T-Rex.
She would have won contests.


But no, they had none. And Mr. T-
Rex was so ******. Not for this, but
Because he couldn't reach his gun;
U know what I mean, his appendage.

Why do we drive in "parking" lots?
Why do we call them buildings still?
They are built. Alone in my thoughts?
Why do we "park" in driveways? Fill

                                    In
                    ­              Your
                               Answers
                                      If
                ­                      U
                                   Will.
Feb 2017 · 523
My Phone Was Broken
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
The Talk To Text feature is stuck on.
Aww CRAP! Come on you piece of junk, stop, Stop, STOP! Aww.. !

Oh, hey Bob. How are you doing today?

I am fine how are you?

Oh, I was fine until my talk to text feature broke. It is recording everything it hears.

Really, Jamie? Let me take a look at it for you.

Oh no you don't, Bob! I am waay better with such things, you broke my last phone, remember?

Well, it couldn't hurt for me to take a look at it...

No.

Really it will be fine...

No.

Duder, it's just a...

No.

Why are you being so hard headed?

Hey, look Bob! I fixed it.

Oh, really?

Yes.

Did you really?

Yes.

Let me see.

No.

Yes.

No, Bob. Go to work.

My work is hell.

Yes Bob. Go there.

I am telling you, I fixed the piece of...

Oh, hey Mom. However is it that you do?

Is something wrong with your phone, Son?

Not anymore, I fixed it.

Well, he says he fixed it. But...

No buts, Bob. Go to work.

Let me see your phone, Son.

No, Mom.

Yes, let me see if I can fix it.

No. I have been working on electronics since I was 8 years old. There's no way you can fix this ****** pho...
Thanks Mother :)
Jamie L Cantore Feb 2017
What is red and smells like blue paint?

What is white and smells like bananas?
2 4 1 Package Deal
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