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I've Never Let A Past Lover Go..

They all have taken a piece of my heart

So I am left with nothing

But an empty cavity

Where my heart once was

So forgive me if you should think I don't love you.
From the bus rides,
To the deadlines;
From the friends,
To the enemies,
From the laughs,
To the fights;
I'm running in circles but I can't keep up,
School is something that I could never escape.
Dear you,

fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuc­kyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufucky­oufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyou­fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufu­ckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyou

Si­ncerely, Josh
And if I could ever write a poem that would embody
Your love
i swear
I would

but

Whenever I'd try to write You down
And immortalize You through words
I end up with a blank page staring at me
Because my words do not give justice
To the beauty of You and Your creation
F
E
A
R
is its own phobia.
I am afraid of
F
E
A
R
because it makes my heart
feel like it will explode.
It sends tremors through my body
that seem horrifically devastating.
The aftershock
is much worse.
I vibrate
I want to
Cry
Scream
Curl up
into a ball
Just disappear
Be no more
F
E
A
R
is my enemy.
I must defeat it
or die trying
Me without you is like,
            A sneaker without laces,
A geek without braces,
                AsentenceWithoutSpaces.
#girlfriend
Uncertainty fills the air
And suddenly I'm not so sure.
Nostalgia begins to decay
But why?
Heavy, heavier...
I inhale and sigh with, what, exasperation?
Creation?
These are all mere distractions
To prevent myself from colliding
With myself,
With how I feel.
Emotional trauma, Part I -
Coming soon to a childhood near you!
We laugh it off
But it does not leave us.
Nothing can leave us
As easily as you walked away
That night.
I will not forget what I saw.
Engraved in my brain
Causing me to crumble
Tumble, tumble...
**Crash.

— The End —