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 Apr 2014 DarkDepriment
faggotten
you looked at the woman's skin
it was clearly darker than yours
you felt annoyed for some reason
a person's color made you so upset
that you felt the weird need
to insult and yell at her
isn't it peculiar
how a certain color
can make you so angry
that you end up ruining
another human being's life
I swear,
to God,
I want to be thin,
but I just
need
to fill
the empty.
 Mar 2014 DarkDepriment
ili
have you
 Mar 2014 DarkDepriment
ili
have you noticed

how silent and calm the earth becomes just as the sun sets beyond the horizon

have you noticed

how even when a storm approaches in the morning, birds still fill the air with their lullabies

have you noticed

how low the fog lays as if ready to befriend and swallow up anything in its path

have you noticed  

how everything keeps living
despite all the changes that occur
everyday

have you
 Mar 2014 DarkDepriment
Caitie
pictures scare me
they're like portrayals of undoubted fun
you look at them
they have become memories
and you relive them in your head
you laugh at the face you made
or the jokes made from that night
but you realize that moment
will never happen again.
the picture can be taken
just as fast as the fun started
and can be destroyed
just as fast as the memory fades.
in an instant.
before your eyes.
before you realize what happened.
like paper in a flame.
nothing lasts forever.
Hot
It's so hot in here
I want to rip off the sheets
But then I will freeze.
 Mar 2014 DarkDepriment
Someone
I want to yell at you for leaving me
I want to call you every name in the book
I want to slam the door in your face so you know how it feels
I want to make you realize that you were wrong
I want you to know how much pain I went through when you left
And how much I’m still going through
I want you to see how you leaving affected me
It’s been awhile
But the pain hasn't stopped
Neither have the tears
While I’m lying awake at night
Restless from the recurring nightmares
This is what I think about
Every single day is a struggle
Dad
I’m tired of feeling like I’ll never amount to anything
I’m tired of living every day in fear
And feeling worthless
I know I’m wrong for talking to you
And I know I’m wrong for caring about you
Despite all of this
I know I will keep putting myself through all this
Pain
And
Guilt
I will stay
*But only because I love you
and when you left me
it hit harder than the rest
it was like swallowing fire
scorching my chest,
desperate to put the flames out
i tried drowning myself from inside

i drank so much
that i could not feel
my own hands,
but i still knew you
were not there to hold them
i don't know what hurt more
the hangover or the heartache

you planted so much sadness
into my veins
i thought about digging them out
i might pretend i am alright
but that knife in my heart
is still wedged in
so tight

you could have told me
i was nothing to you
before i made you my everything
you could have predicted
six more weeks of winter
instead of promising me spring
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