And when I dream of you,
I dream of you in hopes and wishes,
laced in gold and glitters.
In images of warmth and laughters.
I dream of you while awake;
dream of you with so much love,
I could taste it on my lips
and I could feel you in my arms.
And when I dream,
I dream away the distance between us.
The uncertainty and the fear.
I dream of you so much,
I could almost conjure it up
into my reality.
So I dream away.
And I hope.
And I wish.
Until it all comes true.
is a terrifying word.
Not so much, in the way that
you have no idea
of what is inevitable,
in knowing that you have
even just the tiniest bit of power
to alter the course of things;
that even just a slight nudge
to whichever direction,
right or wrong,
there will always be
your words are beautiful.
In so many ways.
They spark like fireworks.
Bright and warm.
Until the dawn comes
and we go back to our own axis,
and you're a million miles away
even though, I am right beside you.
I would hold your hand for some semblance of connection.
But my heart can never seem to reach you.
And you would smile like you're here,
but the truth is, I am not your home.
Not anymore, my love.
And for a moment, through your journey's silence,
you'd hear the feint cries of my heart.
But only just. Like a whisper through the wind.
And then you would say all the words.
All the beautiful words,
like it would bandage the rift of galaxies between us,
but you don't realize
that at the end of every word's tune,
just as they could reach the stars,
Just like fireworks.
all this talk of forever,
as if it's light years away
but it's right here.
and so on, it will go.
I am on a journey backwards,
trying to retrace my footsteps
to where I might have lost myself.
So I can pick it up, and keep going.
I used to look at you
like you were an open book,
out in the open, for the world to see.
But the closer I got,
the more I saw.
I saw the walls around you.
I saw how you painted them to hide yourself.
I saw glimpses of the demons you try to keep at bay.
For the first time,
I saw the baggages you carried.
The scars you wear.
And I realized I have been looking at you
for the longest time,
without ever truly seeing you.
And I am sorry.
But I am here now.
I see you.
It's a daunting thing,
Especially, when you realize
you barely know yourself.