I'll love you because you taught me how to run
You used to run by my side
But now I run from you, with half the strength, twice the speed
I don't know if I was always broken and it just surfaced
or if I was, in fact, whole before you
I'd love to blame everything on you but something runs deep inside me that didn't want to trust even before  you
granted, you confirmed my fears
I wonder if you still think about me and if you do I wonder why you don't reach out.  I wonder if it's hard anymore
It's already been so long and we're both only getting older
And while time can be healing, I think for us, it's sealing the grave that was our relationship
I wonder what happens to the love we had
I wonder if you still ever worry about me
I wonder if you care
Because I still miss you and I'll never let you know
I miss summer baseball games, playing short stop, you yelling from the sidelines
I miss road tripping back with you and talking about nothing
I miss how smart you made me feel
but mostly I miss how proud I made you
They don't warn you how when someone believes in you, encourages you, enables you, loves you
That they can take it all away when they leave
I don't know how or when or what I did to let you down
to make you let me go
I know I started running from you long before you let go
But I ran because I never expected you to quit
I never expected you to stop running after me

One shot for the sorrow,
Two to be sure,
Three for the morning
To make it a blur,
Five hours of dancing,
Six steps till I fell,
Seven minutes unconscious,
As far as I could tell,
Eight people to help,
Nine nine nine took moments to come,
Ten glasses of water,
An aspirin and then some.

If you find a way to feed it,
help it grow,
and keep it alive;
it will find a way to feed you,
help you grow,
and keep you alive.

Whatever happened to the moments
we lived for
the moments we lived from
electrifying lives
currents of passion
high voltage that knew no resistance

what do I have to do?
to feel the surge
to feel the spark
to feel alive again?

Is it in the tomes?
Is it in the songs?
Do the muses hold it in the walls?
Is it inside of me?

Searching for the switch
to send me back to passion
To make me feel charged again
to make me feel in charge again