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Brooklynn Nights Mar 2017
i should have fought,
i should have heard
your cries for help
behind your words
i should have stitched
your shattered heart
if only i'd known
where to start
you carried so
much heavy pain
and now we're left
with all the scars
we loved you so
because you
showed us
who we
Brooklynn Nights Mar 2017
i thought i had forgotten, but really,
you were there the whole time
maybe it wasn't even actually you,
but the idea of you;
a collection of flawless moments
i've been saving up,
playing on repeat

i had a dream about you the other night and i thought
it was no longer possible,
but there you were without warning
and beautiful as ever
i remember that three-word-lie
you used to tell me all the time
about how the sun
would rise
inside my eyes
and that your skin and bones were mine

and i still know a secret
or two
somewhere callused
into the deepest pockets
of my mind
but digging out
any remnants of you
will pile up the dirt
which will eventually
fill my grave
and snap my spine

i've scraped all the plaque
from my heart
and teeth
and placed it into a box
to keep
labeled "don't peek"
but if you do
i won't stay mad at you

there was a day
when we were walking through
the thickest rain
and our clothes grew so heavy
it was nearly impossible to keep them
from falling off of our drenched bodies
and i felt happier in that moment
than i ever wanted to

the thoughts of our yesterdays
choke me in my dreams
and all i want to do is sleep
under your bed
and collect dust
in my lungs
Brooklynn Nights Aug 2016
the poems about you are my best ones
they write themselves, you know
i am nothing but a medium through which words pass
i simply have to bring you to mind
-something that is never difficult-
you live inside of my heart and make it quiver
with each blink of your icy blues
waves of emotion wash over me
i'm suspended in an ocean of our memories
and when i'm finally washed ashore,
traces of you are still tangled within my hair,
weaved between my toes
like a dream, i can't remember exactly where i just was
or how i got there,
but written in the sand before me are words,
carefully arranged in a way not nearly as perfect as you
i stole "icy blues" from the song "demolition lovers" by my chemical romance
Brooklynn Nights Aug 2016
it was grey today
and i left the house without a jacket
the light rain that was too heavy to ignore
speckled my glasses, blurred my vision in areas
i didn't even try to count the drops
to take my mind off of you
i didn't wipe them off or smile as each one landed
because all i wanted was warmth
i wanted to feel the sunshine
consume me yet again
i wanted a ray to reach out and hold me in its glistening embrace
like a blanket made of diamonds,
but nothing took place
i know the sun will return once the clouds blow away
and i'll get to feel your glow again
maybe someday
Brooklynn Nights Jun 2016
i'm fine
as long as i never think about it again
never think about you again
and how the sun is always setting right behind your face,
competing with your shadow
i'll try, but i know i'll never forget
how you are both the strongest and gentlest person
i've ever encountered
or how your smile is a warm blanket
that shields me from how hard i am on myself
as long as i never think about
all the secrets you've told me and no one else,
i know i'll be okay
i locked them away long ago
in my cage of bones
with a heart-shaped lock
you took off with the key
out of sight, out of mind
i hope to god that's true because i won't be alright
if i keep thinking of you
I know the horror
how you can't undress
without feeling like
a ******* mess.

There's got to be something
more than this,
just write until
your thoughts aren't as heavy.

Everyone glances
but nobody reads:
Pour your emotions
into a glass that
nobody drinks.

There's got to be something
more than
vulnerable words in vain:
a medicine
that increases the pain.

I know the horror
how you can't reveal
the fullest extent
of how you feel.

There has to be something
more than a glance,
to help you feel heard;
to validate your world.

Just learn to write
and let it all go,
even if nobody notices
or nobody knows.

Because there is something
more than this.
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