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Matthew S Dec 2017
What is this
That lay near my looking port?!
Why is it green and
What are those shiny things on it?
Is it edible?
Bleh! No! Its not!
Im gonna bite it again

What are those box shaped things under that green thing?
Are those
GASP!
ARE THOSE BOXES?!
THEY ARE MINE NOW
Wait what is this on it. Is it paper?
Its gonna have to go

Why does my two legged father keep yelling at me?
I dont understand him
But i dont care
I clamed these boxes as mine
Oh no! Dad why are you putting me in the room?
I didnt do anything wrong!
Daddy! Let me play with my boxes!

Where did daddy go?
Oh he's back!
Im gonna get my box-
Hey where did they go?
Daddy where did you take my boxes?
I was gonna-
Wait whats that

A box?
And... IS THAT A FUZZY BALL?!
OH AND THIS ONE JINGLES!
I just love throwing it across the room
And then i love chasing it
But more inportantly
Im gonna put my head in this box

Man im tired.
Hey theres that other two legged person
They have grey hair and its long too
Oh look!
They made me a place to sleep
Im gonna go sleep next to them now

Hey there is my daddy
Wait
Whats a crimas?
Is this crimas?
I dont know
But he whispered this into my ear
And he gave me a kiss on my forehead
"Merry crimas socks"
I thought it would be kinda funny to write a poem in the perspective of my cat socks (a.k.a my little kitty baby)
It turned out alright.
Matthew S Dec 2017
Time to hang the stockings
Time to feel real joy
And for one day
Just for a day
Forgive those who may have wronged you

Time to let go of a grudge
Time to bury the hatchet
You can dig it up later
We can forget the drama
At least for a day

Its Christmas!
Or whatever holiday you celebrate
Its time to hand out the
Holiday traditions
And give others cheer

So i beg of you mom
Bury the hatchet
And i can forget you abandoned us
Just for today

Stop with the insults
Stop insulting me
And others
Just for today
There are kids around

Mom please
Just for today
I'll forget the pain
That you gave us
If you would just

Bury the hatchet
I was trying to make it happier and more cheerful but that didnt happen
Matthew S Dec 2017
I was just a child
No more than 8 years old,
When you touched me
You ripped off the clothes i had on
And tried to take my virginity
I struggled
And struggled
Untill i got free from the
Cheap beer breath
And horrifying monster of a man
That you have become

I ran into the bathroom
And hid
Until my cousin
The one you were supposed to have been in love with
Came home to a crying mess of an 8 year old
Who was in the bathroom
Hiding from the demon

I didnt tell anyone for years
I didnt feel like i could
After all
You didnt take my virginity away
But you took everything else away from me

You took my trust away
You ruined my self esteem
You took your stained knife and tore me too pieces
You took away my peace of mind
And instaled the fear of being touched by you again
Touched by anyone again
A fear so bad that
I didnt tell anyone about you
Until you were gone

Yet some people tell me
My mom,
My "friends",
The media,
Just because
I was able to pull away
Just because i was able to keep my virginity
I cant feel this pain
That i shouldn't
And that the ones who had such a precious thing
Taken away from them deserve to feel it
To be open about it

So for years i stood silent
While others spoke up
Because im a person
Who was molested
But im done being controlled
So i stand with my fellow broken men and women
And chant

"Me too!"
I felt like i needed to get this off my chest. For years i felt like i couldnt say anything about being molested because their was alwayd someone saying "well my pain is bigger than your pain!" "well i was ***** so im worse off than you!". Why is this a thing? Why do people feel the need to tell people who were molested that since they "didnt have their virginity taken away" they were better off? For years i cried myself to sleep, and for years i could imagine his hands still on me but yet im not supposed to be upset about that?
I dont get it.
Im not trying to say "oh people who are ***** need to shut up" or "blah blah my pain is worse blah blah", im just saying that people who were molested should not be critisized for speaking up, neither should people who were *****. **** and molestation are both terrible and it needs to stop.
Pronto.
Matthew S Dec 2017
Sick
I feel like a avalanche of pain and emotion
Just waiting for the dam of sanity to break
So that way i have an excuse to sleep in later

Tired
I feel like the sand man missed my house-
Or just my room-
For the hundredth time this month

Pain
I feel like if the ache in my head got any bigger
Or if the pain in my stomach grew any larger
I would explode and turn into dust

Pills
I feel like they are there for me
They are the only thing that gives me the chance to catch myself
And they let me do more

Numb
I feel like numbness doesnt come fast enough
And that maybe that it would come quicker
If i took just one more pill

Sick
I think im sick
But the only way i know how to stop it
Is to take more pills

But id rather just stay sick
Ive been getting sick lately and its like everyday i have to take ibuprofen for really bad headaches. I just dont know what is wrong, So im gonna go see a doctor. I just feel like im gonna go insane if i dont
Matthew S Dec 2017
The headache i have
Never stands a chance with the pain in my heart
Id rather feel pain physically
Where i can take a pill
and it all goes away
But if someone else needed that pill
Id gladly deal with the pain

The aching of my hand
Is a pain i welcome
Because it shows that I've done something special
I used my hand for good
If carpal tunnel is the price i pay
to do good in the world
Then the price will be payed

The pain in my heart
It stays even though a pill is taken
Even though i try my best to get rid of it
My heart is too broken
But if the pain in my heart
Can help someone
Could heal someones pain

Then ill use the pain
Ill take the pain
And ill help them heal theirs
If this poem is the pill
And my words are the cure
Then let my pain come
I welcome it
*i did not mean illegal drugs, and prescription drugs in the first paragraph. i meant over the counter drugs* its not the best poem ive written but... its a poem
Matthew S Dec 2017
Today i wished
My pain away
On a sea of tears and bloodstains

And from that sea
It kindly rewarded me
The happiness that i borrowed

But i know well
The borrowed happiness
Is nothing but a loan

So i sit in bliss
While i fear the day
The sea
Returns my sorrow to me
I'm iffy on this poem. I don't think its my best poem.
oh well. if it *****, i can improve  myself.
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