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 Sep 2015 Gudden
spysgrandson
I see the barrel at the temple
feel the nickel sized circle on the skin
hear the loud last report
after the trigger pulled

daily, this scene scrolls in the head
a secret, e pluribus unum,  one
no other players read
in their scripts

I don't write theirs, only
mine, and they have their own
clandestine plans, their own
scenes at the edge of the
abyss

sometimes, I see them
fall, screaming, or silent
until they land among the other
bones

I don't know, I will never
see that place with my eyes
for I lack the courage to jump
or squeeze the trigger

no
I will find a way to sleep
and never wake up, let others wonder what lines
I read in my final hours hiding from the sun,
or why I chose pills and potions
instead of the gun
I'm tired
of the heat
and the humidity

when you're not here
to distract me
 Sep 2015 Gudden
Brandy Nicole
I wish I could say I'm shocked,
but love isn't us
Did you enjoy her bed?
Because your drunken call
sayed it all
Dear you can do
better than that
You forget I have friends
in this town too, and tonight
I'll have treat as well
Sharing my bed with
Jack and Crown
 Sep 2015 Gudden
nivek
its true, it will not be so long until no one will remember you
so do not go spending a lot of money on a fancy tombstone
a grave eventually only frequented by birds and the man who occasionally cuts the grass .
 Sep 2015 Gudden
Nikola Mills
I will never touch your magnificent skin

And I will never adore the scars
The scars adorning your forehead
The wounds from your childhood

I will never laugh at your goofiness
The way you fell and bruise your skin
And I will never kiss the pain away


And I will forever miss the scent
The scent of your skin after shower
Being envy of the droplets
Making their way across your collarbone


I miss the freckles
shining through the pale skin
I miss the palm lines
I used to read stories from

And there is not a day
when I don't miss every part of you.
 Sep 2015 Gudden
Mike Essig
by Trista Mateer*

After my father
left
part of me
became
determined
to always do the leaving

and I have
yet
to let it down.
 Sep 2015 Gudden
GfS
Threshold
 Sep 2015 Gudden
GfS
I can only pray
that my patience
would never reach
it's peak
for as a man
who can only
take as much
as a human can
I'm almost at
threshold

I always believed
that I'm not allowed
to say a single rant
for there are things greater
than what I can imagine
I'm told that
I can't complain
I can't frown
I can't wonder
for that's what it means
to be selfless..
yet I still ponder

My mother always told me
"just be a little more patient"
how can I be, when
father always tells me
"YOU ARE NOT THINKING"
"ARE YOU BLIND!?"

I'm sorry, father
if I'm not up to the test
but know that
I follow every word
ever sentence for the best
For every spare moment
I had, I have given it to you
I did promise that
I would take care of you
be your "right" side
as I termed it

I'm sorry if
I have no idea
what the heck you're pointing at
whenever you want me to get
something for you
I'm sorry if
I have no idea
what you want to say and if I don't know
what you're thinking
I'm sorry if
I'm not the smartest guy you'll ever meet
cause I might never fully understand
what you really want from me

But please, Dad.. tell me
is it worth it to tell me
"YOU DON'T CARE"
"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND"

I understand fully that your time on earth
runs by the shorter years, but please dad
please... your words hurt me more
than every beating that you have given me

I do understand that you want me to grow
but it always hurts me more
that you're willing to let go..

Dad, I'm almost at threshold
It's been 3 years since my dad's stroke.......
and his sermons have been increasing threefold
I'm always happy that he's still alive
but... yeah.. I just wish he's happy that I am too.
 Sep 2015 Gudden
Wanderer
The best of intentions
Often lead to broken hearts
Hope graveyards
The memory of warmth
Ghost arms to hold us
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