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 Aug 2016 Wordforged Fool
Stephan
.
Here it is,
go ahead, rip it apart,
it’s just poetry,
it has no feelings,
won’t show any emotion,
definitely won’t bleed,
shed tears or fight back,
just a bunch of words
poured from someone’s
freaking heart, (yeah I said freaking,
does that make me a loser?)
Oh well, you can just go f,
nah, it doesn’t matter anyway,
it’s just poetry,
rip it apart, go ahead,
here it is
Fly
I have serious intentions
To break my limitations
 Aug 2016 Wordforged Fool
Stephan
.
An empty corner bends
beneath street lights working overtime
and a bench, cold and lonely,
damp from previous storms
and those threatening,
closing dark curtains
on a weary skyline,
beckons, offering a seat,
hard horizontal slats
last occupied by another
with hopes and dreams
left to wander, wondering why

A black cat crosses my path
and I laugh at its expression
Knowing it believes bad luck
will come of this, little does it know,
I have no path for it to cross,
no destination, no planned outcome
or luck to speak of
Pushing the crosswalk button
again and again
and still it reads "don’t walk,"
I do as I am told

I shouldn't look, what's the use,
it always the same, you spill your soul
and it's washed away with the last phrase
He gets them, oh he gets them
on every one, no matter what it is
and **** if she doesn't get them too,
hell even crap gets them,
far too many times
But I shouldn't complain,
it's nice being liked,
you don't even have to hear the click
It's just hard sometimes when you realize,
you're just not as good as you thought

Feeling drowsy now I settle in
on softened splinters and peeling paint,
counting passing cars like sheep
in the soothing flicker of
a faulty flourescent sign
at the 24 hour tattoo parlor
Where needles aren’t the only thing
spurting ink, perforating skin,
creating lasting impressions
that even a beautiful sunrise
can’t erase as I fall off to a world
that doesn’t seem so bad,
at least for a few hours,
hoping that when I wake
it wakes with me
 Aug 2016 Wordforged Fool
Stephan

I hope this hole in my heart
is big enough to hold my coffin,
because I no longer have the energy
to dig my own grave
One time is all it took for me to believe that you truly hated me.
One time is all it took for my hand to hurt, you kept hitting me though.
One time you left me in a parking lot and hid your car so I couldn’t see you, I was scared every time I went into the store from then on, you said it was funny.
One time I self-harmed in my bedroom, it became an addiction after that.
One time I stole something from my cousin and I kept stealing, I needed your attention.
You wouldn’t listen to me; you wouldn’t hold me.
The words I love you wasn’t said much.
I love you, do you hear me?
I don’t hate you.
Things need to change though.
I can’t keep living in fear, I can’t see grandma cry because of what you said to me.
Grandma blames herself, she thinks it’s her fault.
I need you, I need my mom.
Say something.
Speak up, you have a voice don’t you?
Doesn’t anyone want to listen to you?
You are lovely, can’t you see that?

Broken heart.
My dad.
Lost love.
Self-harm.
Making things ok with my mother.
Seeing my cousins grow up.

None of this matters now.
I’m tired of living, maybe I should die.
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