You
dear humanity
have robbed me
of my sanity,
stealing my solace
and left a disease
of emptiness,
but I will
have my peace
when I leave,
when I am deceased.

He is not here
and there is
a clear fear
that my dear
brother
will die
in some other country.

Perhaps, a plane will crash
split and bend
while it spins
spiraling
like a wild football,
and fire will rain,
and there will be pain,
and I will not see him again.

Perhaps, some religious sect
will find and collect
my brother and his new bride
to collect a ransom check
or **** him for his religious views.

Other deaths come in to my head.
Unbidden nightmares
that wake me.
Then I daydream
that he returns to me.
A small red breasted robin
singing joyfully,
a reincarnated being.

Sadly, I do not believe such things.
So, I still dread the day
someone comes and says
your brother is dead.

To see you smile again
to play a game of
Chinese checkers
and then dominoes
watch wheel of fortune
to see who knows
the answer faster
then those *******
on the show.

To see your
scraggly face
half-grown beard
silent strong type
who smoked a pipe
who worked the campground
near the end of his life
just to make a little more money
and have something extra
to do at night

To go back to when
we three were traveling
together to New Salem
me the small skinny
child with tubes in his ears
and you two old farts
who took me there

Now I only see you two
in dreams.

What a beautiful man
a character in muted colors
speaking Shakespeare’s words.
I covet the players coven
a place where such wonders
where made manifest,
where actors did their best
to express in proper parlance
past prose and poetry.

What a fine figure
full of creative vigor
that speaks loudly
marking lines with fierceness
and a slight playful puckish
variety.

What a time to relish
spoken forms
the theater
worn for such
vocal storms
and I am in love
not a ****** decree
but an infatuation
founded upon
the wonderous creativity
of this sweet performer
before me.

Shame on me
for having a human heart.
It is a strange weakness
to watch and see this
wave of inhumanity
and wonder why
I stand immune
from said insanity
whilst all the other people
rush and strangle each other
in a frantic state
of hate and rage
that breaks the place
where some people stash
true love away.

Once I was
a carefree breed
uncowed you see
by my society,

but I as I gained
sweet security
measured by
materiel wealth’s
so called maturity

the fear of losing
what little I had
confounded and
controlled me.

Once, I would have
given my last dollar
to any stranger
who was hungry,

I would have stopped
to comfort with kind words
anyone who seemed
bothered,

and whether going to
or coming home from work
I would have stopped
to help a stranded stranger.

Now, even though,
I know
these people
pose no danger
I do not stop
nor part
with any pennies.

Instead, I rush to work
and to the gym
to make money
and muscles
in hopes of
fitting in
by looking
buff but still
trim,
working towards
that **** thin.

Nose to the grindstone
focused on the job
and all the stresses
like keeping well dressed
and keeping my car running,

the once
kind carefree fellow
I used to be
becomes corrupt
by my insecurity
in the pursuit of
stability.

Why do we not raise our voice
in the exaltations
of eloquent speeches
that elevate
human beings
search for the true meaning
of this mean existence?

Why do we elevate
false cloth symbols
while celebrating
the sacrifices
of the subjected
and suckered
masses?

Why does
the angry incoherent cries
of a madman
overshadow
the million more
who struggle for
a better world?

Why do I bother
writing these words
knowing they
will not be heard
by many
and of those few
who
even deign to notice
most will ignore
in favor of
more interesting diversion?