when do you let go of pain?
can you?
or does it burrow itself in your heart,
left in hibernation until a new season of heartache comes along?
will it sleepily emerge,
or come out roaring, hungry?

I thought I saw
What I thought I knew
What I thought was real
What I thought was good

But what I thought
        was just a thought

And that's all it was
         just a notion
         just a guess

a shot in the dark


I think, I thought
I say, I do
She says, She needs
He knows, He tries


But things we think
   and say
   and do
when clock bells ring
and hands strike 12
Are colors stained, beneath dark veils
canvas of dust, that civil eyes hide
and the artist

idle

idle, so idle becomes ashamed
and thinks
and ponders if there is another meaning to this

shameful portrait

and thinks
and does
says, knows
needs, wants

takes up arms

furious strokes

____l e f t

r i g h t___

\
  s
     l
       a
         s
           h
             e
               s
                  \
and

     thrusts -------->

burst noise
spew sweat
drip curses
bleed color

more
more more!
  more   more! more!
more  more!   more  more!
more!  more!  more! moremoremore!
moremoremoremoremoeroerermroeom

And      ----



now

with  heavy  breath

          another


         one more

eyes, stinging sweat, open
thinking, hoping, praying
scared, half smiling
stares


and stares


a

n

d






s
t

a


r




e






s







still                       _


                                                quiet        ­             _ 



canvas of dust
canvas of lies
canvas of this and
canvas of that but
canvas of what?!
and down comes the veil
like it always does
like it always will


and again it is dark

under the veil

You mix me into your life,
Like a secret to good to say.
Pitter patter,
A step here and a leap there;
You ***** it all out anyways.

The heart; it is your worst friend.
It is there and not, depending
On the lie untold.

I realized it was time to get over you
Yes, I was sad, you didn't want me
But now that I'm finally happy with being by myself....
You decide to take me?

You, like myself, are not upright,
You're awake in bed, like every night.
As the night grows old,
the dawn is young, but your time asleep, is yet none.

When your head hits the pillow, thoughts burst forth,
Burying your mind,
Like snow of the North.

So turn off your phone and go to sleep,
Because the snow is only so deep.

Goodbye.