Emily Von Shultz

Emily Von Shultz Jan 2013

Deity of wars,
Devourer,
Defender,
Domesticated, yet wild at heart.

She cast her light and protection upon the Middle Kingdom and Upper East,
Blessing the soil and crops upon which her followers jubilantly feast.

Do they dare forsake her?

Suppressed ferocity,
Longing to break free of that which entombs her.
The shrine lies in ruins,
yet nine times immortalized.

In her eyes that see all,
Lay a world lost for so long,
Brought back to life by her awakening roaring song.

She claws at the sky and rekindles the flame,
She slips through the gates of time unscathed and scalds those who fail to do the same.

Her eye became The Sun,
Her other eye, The Moon.
Her blood became The Nile,
And she encouraged her children to drink of it,
An unswayed symbol of the eternally nubile.

#goddess

Emily Von Shultz Jan 2013

Utopian Maiden

She is many things to me...

Captivating!
She is captivating!
Knowing only that I want to wrap her in the finest silks and wreath her in clover,
And pray that her reign of my heart may never be over.

Elegant!
She is elegant when she walks with her head held high,
And draws many a look from astonished passerby.

Brilliant!
She is brilliant!
Her mind creates kingdoms
which span beyond the wings of heaven's most radiant angel,
There is darkness in there,
But not all darkness is evil.

Beautiful!
She is beautiful in an otherworldly way,
And I shall never tire to gaze upon her fair freckled face,
around which tawny tresses tenderly play.

Enchanting!
She is enchanting with every eloquent sentence she sings,
And my spirit rejoices and relishes in the euphoric serenity she brings.

She is many things to me,
She always has been,
And always will be.

#love #muse #crush

Emily Von Shultz Oct 2012

Unfinished Obelisk

Bedroom window,
facing East,
I'll open my curtains before I go to sleep.

Sunlight pours onto my bed in the morning,
waking me with its warm and gentle touch.
If I open my eyes,
it will shatter the hope that it might be your breath,
and such a realization would be too much...
I never want to wake up and deal with the real world without you, wonder love.
I'll lie here just a little longer again,
and savor the moment until the sun begins to burn my skin.

I never considered the wind a "friend",
yet I whisper your name to her under the light of the moon,
and tell her my story of a love that was lost too soon,
in hopes that some day,
wherever you are,
she may carry my message to you,
whether you be near or far.

"Today is another day to find you."

#love #lost

Emily Von Shultz Oct 2012

Abominable

Sit up straight,
you're not pretty when you seem so relaxed.
Suicide season only comes once a year,
there's no other time for sadness here.

Never spend any money on food,
buy expensive clothes to please everyone else,
even though you live all of your life in solitude.

Spread yourself too thin by biting off more than you can chew,
keep reminding yourself that discipline is a virtue.

You're becoming so distant from the rest,
and the finish-line is blurry now.
You're not sure if they're overlapping you or you're the one that's winning,
yet you feel it is both somehow.

Make it through another Autumn and fall into Winter,
and maybe this time you can walk alone in the snow without leaving a footprint.
It will be beautiful,
it will be pure,
it will be worth it,
I am sure.

An abominable thought comes to mind:
You can crash your car violently enough so that it will ruin your entire face, it will be a blank slate, and then no one can judge you for getting plastic surgery.
You might actually look better that way.

A cognitive distortion
blown out of proportion,
it haunts my mind every day.

#ana #perfection #distortion #bdd

Emily Von Shultz Oct 2012

Can I use your trash can?

Surprise me,
kick me over,
roll me around until I'm nothing but an inanimate object;
struggling is hard when you're frozen.

Nameless and unrecognized, except for the stench of alcohol, tobacco, and oily skin against my own.

Strangled screams,
clenched jaw and bubblegum gnashed between teeth,
the flavor was gone.

This was the day I found out that I am a trash can.

Shhhhh, it'll be our little secret.

Emily Von Shultz Sep 2012

Stones to Swallow

Hot and metallic,
the taste of blood floods my mouth;
I imagine that's what God would taste like.

I could have sworn there were two candles,
side-by-side on the table,
but from far away,
in the darkness,
with eyes half-closed,
it looks like only one flame.

Together,
they're burning brighter than ever,
knowing that their ending won't be met with a dramatic explosion or mournful cries:
It will be silent,
and it will go unnoticed by sleeping eyes.

Emily Von Shultz Apr 2012

Unconditional Dictations of the Heart

I promise you,
I promise you that this time,
I'll be perfect.

I know you only tell me lies,
but I love you so much that I'll force myself to believe them.

I will remember you,
I will remember you in those fractions of moments between the past and present and the present and future,
where the concept of time is irrelevant.

This will be the last time I ******* without telling you how much I hate you.

I will find you,
I will find you where some part of you still exists.
I keep it in a box under my bed.

Even after all these years,
all the progress that I've made melts away every time I see you.

I will run to you,
I will run to you until my addiction incapacitates me,
but at least I’ll know that I had a reason.

The skin that was scarred because of you has finally been shed.
I am ready to try again.

I promise you,
I promise you that this time,
I'll be perfect.

#love #promises #addiction #perfection