I was
Filled with you to the brim.
Every bone, every marrow
Every living part of me
buzzed with your existence.

I was
Consumed by your eyes,
your mouth.
By your teeth
that sank into my flesh
tearing skin, pulling me in.
Closer
And closer
Until I poured myself into you
becoming a river you could not withstand.
The crying roar
The churning waves
The liquorice tides
seeped through like cotton
soaking every part of you,
poisoning every ligament
rotting you from within.
I spent you bit by bit.

You are not to blame, darling
for leaving
i am
an endless river
and you
                                       should get far far away
June, 2016

A kaleidoscope
Of your hair, lips, eyes
Is all I see
Laying in the cool grass
Enveloped in a curtain of night

Twinkling stars that
form constellations in my heart
and resonate in my chest,
Are honey drops
of your laughter

Gravity loosens its hold,
I lose my breath and
the world tilts
When the scent of your skin
Seeps through my pores

Under my fingertips
You,
Ignite the sun's never ending ember
that flows through me,
Melting the moon

And the taste of you darling,
melting in my mouth
oh so sweet,
leaving a trace

of the milkyway

My hands miss the rain
and the pitter patter of hail
December and all it brings
and freckles that don’t wash out.

They miss the dim yellow light
that shone through your teeth
that made them into thieves
filling them with blood
that stole my pulse.

And your eyes like wine
that brought the stars upon them.

My hands can’t think straight anymore
they fumble and cry.
Fingernails bleed,
they cling to one more hour of night
They forget to breathe
starved of air until they crack open
joints swollen and askew
Unable to point

My hands are now stained
with henna and tears
as they itch with longing

August, 2017

A morsel of pain quickens the heart,
its gentle breeze becomes a cloud
simply hovering at first, grey and peaceful a refreshing delight to the sun
an innocent melancholy.
With the strike of lightning, the downpour starts, collecting rapidly, until turning into an ocean thundering and churning
demolishing all things beautiful,
cracking and tearing down ivory bridges with every strike. Escalating, booming in all its mightiness
until its roar is all I hear,
the currents pounding against the rhythm of my heart pushing it outwards, stringing along my insides,
turning me inside-out like a coat.

And I,
amidst the endless battering of the waves, struggling to breathe head halfway under
I reach out to the sky in vain
towards the ghost of the ivory bridge
Gasping for air,
salt mixing in salt
my hand stretches up again
looking for someone, anyone
towards a god of a religion forgotten
flailing and struggling, until my lungs burn
water overpowering the fire in my heart.
With a final pull from the endless current
my head goes under

I awake to find myself in a strange desert land, completely dry.
I feel nothing
wrung out, every fragment of pain
every memory of joy
completely evaporated from my once-soaked soul my heart no longer beating,
I am nothing.

March, 2016

water strikes lightning
your skin under my touch.
mouth consumed in love
eyes rising above dusk.

smoke shattering glass,
fragments of gasps and sighs.
body pinned under
in between the sunrise

breaths held to suspend,
fall from the edge of night.
wave crashing over,
melting us out of sight.

Shattered glass,
gentle fall
Bits of you
in them all