I'm flying away in my head full of thunder
with tears on my face I can only wonder how long It'll take to forget what I'm feeling.
Am I ever gonna love this way again?

The words on my lips that are never spoken anymore
the dreams of another kiss that could leave me broken
they shadow and haunt me  
they keep me awake
They make me wonder if; Should I have ever gone away?

I know It was for my best
but how the hell do I deal with all the rest?
All the rest of my feelings for you,
What am I supposed to do?
I thought I was doing well but
how are you all around me when you're not really there?
Why do I keep seeing you everything I stare?
every time I stare at literally anything, every time I close my eyes, every time I dream.
It's ridiculously and hauntingly consuming.
Perhaps I'm still too in love to let go, even though I know I have to keep you off my mind but I just can't suppress the memories,
I'm killing my own mind
so I guess I'm not doing fine,
I'm not alright.

Most music is ruined for me, I made monsters out of songs and they scream at me your name
I found this out the other day when I listened to what you used to play,
and so they asked me
"does this song reminds you of him?"
I laughed because,
well,
everything does.

Now I'm left here all alone wondering how I could grow so attached in just months and make the mistake to make a guy my whole world.

My whole world truly because
everywhere I go, everywhere I look, all I see is you.
And I kinda hope you see me too.
In every song I listen to, I can only hear you, in every book I read, you're there in every word. I guess my heart is still sore.

I'm starting to worry I might go insane
I'm just keeping myself in chains
I hope all this pain stops very soon
or else I'm gonna keep going to bed until noon
because all I feel in the moon is you and I'm pretty sure I'll end up getting lost in it,
just as I got lost in you.

Maybe you think I'm selfish and you hate me now but you can't deny you pushed me away too bad.
You know you took me for granted and I hope you regret that you didn't value what you had and what you "wanted".

I need to let go, I can't keep holding on to this grudge,
I guess this is me saying goodbye,
I can't keep telling myself lies and making myself blind.
I wish you the best, I needed to get this off my chest.
And I'm sorry If me ending us hurted you, but now all I wanna do is get over you.

I saw you in my sleep last night again.
It isn't enough for you to be on my mind all the time.
It doesn't matter that I see you everytime I close my eyes.
You won't settle with being in the darkest corners of my mind.
I used to go to sleep so I would'nt have to think, now I wake up sweating because of the nightmares where I sink.
I sink in the ocean of my tears and I drown because you're not with me

The world I seem to occupy
will never see me eye to eye
when rules which bound our fragile lives
leave us fractured,
in disguise.
But if I went a different path
and found some peace in all my wrath
could I escape into a realm
where I'd be captain of the helm?
Rid my soul of all the fear,
that there is only order here.

Do not follow what they say
and don't just live from day to day
Fight away the nine to five
and find what makes you feel alive
Be strange
Go search for you
Climb the peaks and sail the blue.
The high you'll feel is not unreal
just emptiness you wish to heal.

Twisted and delusional is all this will ever be. We keep moving forward being people we don't want to be

Our minds are stuck on a small and lonely place; this is all because we're trying to resemble someone else's face.

All I ever wished for is that I could freely love, but everytime I try it's so hard not to be judged.

We are all cookie cutters and different is not a word.
Same is the same
and that's all that is in this world.

I can't math
but I can word
Start telling students what they're worth
grades do not define who you are
or how great you'll be
they're just sheets with ink that make you believe how dumb or smart you seem.

Some say we're only put in school for the systems sake, oh how I wish this was fake.

We take tests and ache because we didn't get that perfect ten. I wish we could all just shake it off our heads and don't break of stress.

I'm not saying school is not important,
education is the key but school is the lock, it's all about passing and we're not even learning anymore.
As long as you follow the rules and pass your exams you're cool,
but If your answer is something outside the box then the automatic respond is a cross.

Education expands your horizons and visions but school doesn't get further from divisions.
Education inspires minds but school just fills our heads and they try to make us blind and not think for ourselves.
Just memorize equations, facts and dates, they say. For what really? half of them I'll forget straight after the exam, ******* I just really don't wanna be a lamb.

I often find myself on early mornings running to class, because I've spent the night studying, memorizing and trying to pass. I run just to find a spot on which I could rest my head and just sleep without making a scene,
Ironic,
because that's the only time I ever spend on school chasing my dreams

No, I'm not saying that school is bad and there's nothing to gain; All I'm saying is set straight your aims and don't believe all they say.
Stay in school, just don't be a fool.

He awoke one morning sobbing and crying. He didn't know why, but on the inside he felt like he was dying.
He could hear his wife and kids going on about their day as he lay in the bed.
He tried to be strong for them, tried to wipe away his tears but he couldn't.
And instead of being the stereotypical man, keeping his head held high and going to work with his own two hands... he fell to the floor and cried out in pain. His crying was uncontrollable; the tears ran down his cheeks and hit the floor like pouring rain.

He was diagnosed with depression so he took drugs to relieve himself of his compression.
He took the drugs so he could once again open his eyes and see the color of the day.
He took the drugs so he could smile, look around and not be afraid to go this way or that way.
Each time he would take the med, he would smile because he knew soon enough he would be better. But what he didn't know, was that smile would soon turn to a dread. That wasn't suppossed to happen.

Days turned to weeks, and weeks turned to months not going to work. Each and every day he would look at his adult hands but each and every day, he would feel less like a man and more like a child. He was in even more pain now.
He felt more and more like suicide was the only way out, but every time that thought crossed his mind, he cried. He was afraid of what might happened if he tried.
Would it hurt? But what could hurt worse that the pain he was feeling at that moment?

He had a voice but it was soft spoken and no one could hear it, or maybe he just didn't know how to explain the pain he felt on the inside and out.
On the inside he was reaching out for help but his hands wouldn't move, he was stuck in time, stuck in this groove.
He became disabled and was denied disability over and over again.

He went to doctor appointment after doctor appointment and continued to sign his life away with the same ******* pen.
He would frequently fall into pits of darkness and the professionals kept pushing facility after facility. They wanted to take him away from his family and make him someone else's liability.

He often wondered if there was anyone else out there that knew his pain. He tried to explain, but never could. Let's say he was actually able to, what would he gain?
It would just be another person feeling sorry for him, and he didn't need that.
Could anyone else really know what it's like to wake up every day just to be terrified to go outside?

And it wasn't that he didn't give it any effort because believe it, he tried.
Could anyone else really know what it's like to walk in public and feel every pair of eyeballs watching?

He knew he wasn't like everybody else and he knew they knew it too.
He constantly felt like he was in a play, center stage and everyone was watching it.
He tried to keep his head down, he tried to not give a **** but it didn't work.
He was a marrionette puppet, he couldn't control his movements. Back to center stage it was a nuisance.

Oh how he wished he could just go back to being depressed and ****. At least he could pretend and try to repress it, like Robin Williams.
But in reality Robin Williams was gone. And a few days after the news broke, he found out he was taking the same **** Robin was on.

You were always high
 but never off my mind
  Still I wanted you with all my heart maybe I was too blind to see that I was too kind to your addiction
and baby I wish it was all just fiction, but oh you were my affliction.

I'm always missing what we had,
  I loved you with all my heart

  You said you loved me like you've    never loved before
you said I was the best thing that  ever happened to you, you swore.
You said the thought of me was your favorite kind of high
You said that no pill, ***** or ***
couldn't even begin to create
the high my presence delivered
That I was the only drug you needed.

Well, you said a lot of things.

You were always high but I did not mind,
your eyes and the way you smiled were too distracting to notice you were just acting to love me the same way I loved you

You hurted me like no one ever had
You had all my heart
but I didn't have yours
I've given up hope
You'll always love me less
than you love your dope