The elves congregated
In the back room of the shop,
Muttering amongst themselves
And chattering on nonstop.
One elf stood on a table
And scanned the angry crowd.
He raised his hand to shush
The others from getting too loud.
"Fellow elves, be quiet.
We have work to do;
This isn't just a trivial
Elven ballyhoo.
"Santa's expectations
Have risen exceedingly.
He takes no action when
I ask him pleadingly
"For a raise in pay
And better working conditions.
He only chortles and laughs
And speaks of old traditions."
An elf spoke up from the group:
"The reindeer have it made.
We work our butts off;
But see how little we're paid.
"Why they earn so much
Isn't really clear
When they only work
ONE night of the year!
"Platitudes and promises
Do nothing to assuage
Angry workers. Santa
Must increase our wage!"
"Yes," chimed in another.
"Not keeping up with inflation,
Our pay keeps us living
In serious deprivation.
"Our benefits also haven't
Kept up with the times.
They are slashed while
The cost of insurance climbs.
"I know we've a lot to do,
And I think we're pretty meticulous,
But the hours we're forced to work…
I mean…this is ridiculous!
"And what about part-time elves
Who have little enjoyment
Working for no benefits?
You call that employment?"
Disgruntled, all the workers
Considered taking action
And wondered what to do
To get some satisfaction.
Another elf said, "Santa's
Heavy demands are an onus.
And we elves don't even
Get a Christmas bonus!
"Frankly, it takes every
Ounce of faith I can muster
To think that dear ol' Santa's
Not a union buster!
"Furthermore, there's something
That I've got to say:
We all have to strive
For equality of pay."
"Yay!" the elves shouted
And in unison chanted:
"Equal pay: Yes!
Take nothing for granted!"
The work discussion lingered
Well into the night.
They knew that gaining ground
Would require a fight.
(In thinking about life,
Struggles, work, and fairness,
It doesn't hurt anyone
To have some elf-awareness.)
Eavesdropping here,
You've seen for yourself
That life's not always peachy--
Even for an elf.
Let's just hope that Santa
Doesn't be a ****
And save a few bucks next year
By outsourcing the work.
- by Bob B