Dwell to ease your numbness

then fly away to secrete the chaos

bring wrath upon your river eyes
because the pressure swallows you

but

what happens when I dive in and have never learned to come up for air?

will the promised land accept me again?

or will i forever drown?

you can be numb in the truth but it’s still eating you alive

is there really good done when i open my eyes?

see what you will, but i’m saying goodbye

******* truth so I can drown in peace

There is beauty and danger
in the body of a fighter,
not something of ****** desire,
but a physique and discipline to admire.

The martial artist moving fluidly
like a dancer of destruction,
finely tuned definition,
with deft and swift movements
made to disable opponents.

Self-defense,
aggressiveness,
barbaric chest beater
enemy defeater,
history maker.

The intellectual may scoff,
the poet and painter,
may laugh off,
but the dancer probably gets its,
cause she knows how to move
and not get hit.
She can see the spin in this
body that moves with
a similar flow.

I am in love
because
though I seek to exist
peacefully
there is a destructive artist
inside of me,
a caged beast
that I never let free.

A funhouse mirror man,
without a clear plan,
who adapts and improves,
takes hits and advances,
striking back in my own way

I was uncertain seeing
other human beings
with their feelings
moving fluidly,
seeming constantly at ease
while I was always overthinking these
intangible things.

Now I am learning,
this deep yearning
to understand
what other humans
take for granted
is a fool’s errand.

Most people are
sick and disgusting
gut busting
heart farting,
mind belching,
and squelching
any common senses.

They seldom think about,
are able to comprehend,
the thoughts and desires,
the sadness or elevation
of being so grandly inspired
that my heart aspires
to write love and understanding
into this cold reality.
Sadly, they are just reactionary.

His power was rooted in darkness,
but he constantly fought his thoughtless urges.
Being kind with tiny purchases,
opening doors, asking others
what they are searching for
in his poetic type pleas
that he typed out for strangers to read.

Perhaps it was his need
to be here, to plant seeds,
to breathe deep of this sweet air,
and speak loudly to be heard clear,
because it was his own obscurity he feared.

Sometimes he felt like a parody
or a pale reflection
of human emotion.
He couldn’t tell if in his expressions
he was just a mimicker those around,
or if these deep feelings were truly his?

His smile and gentleness
hid the gravity of violence
that he had lived in,
and most of the time he thought
the goodness he was giving
was in direct opposition
to the pain he once existed in
and his desire to never see
another human being
suffering.

I am a greedy goblin gobbling great perspectives,
a sneaky thief, sweeping in silent as the wind,
no creaky hinges will stop me as I move inches
pushing forward, moving towards worlds of words
as a dreamer, poet, lover, and thought explorer.

Like a ninja in the night, I wait and listen
for the whispered ideas most are missing,
to devour each tasty flower that nourishes and empowers
my artist heart for seconds, minutes, and hours.

I am selfish because I wish to taste the tastiest poetic dishes,
and let the flavor linger on my tongue,
taking the lines and savoring each one
cause they are so terribly delicious.
Till the meal is done and it is my turn to cook up
a thought, line, verse, or rhyme that another will love.

she smiled at me
"we can't do this anymore"
the curtains were drawn
we were left as neglected fetuses
i began cutting my strings one by one
her touch haunted me in my sleep
after tasting the bitter morning
my pale hands delved into my chest
past transgressions reveal yourself
the night came after orange withdrawal
she returned with a silent kiss
we stepped into styrofoam
her passiveness was almost comforting
we shared apricots and drew red lines
into each others' skin.
the peachy morning sun rose
and it all came up in tears
i vomited on my white sheets
in disgust of myself