Chaotic world

Chaotic world Jun 2016

Hold me close tonight,
I need your arms wrapped around me
Before the pieces of me tumble like a game of jenga,
I'm trying my best to see the last page of my story,
But I think it's only a matter of time till I decide to end my story,

So hold me close tonight
While you fill my head with beautiful fantasies,
Before I decide to insert lead into it tonight,
Intoxicate me with your voice,
Before I intoxicate myself with deaths poison tonight,
Give me the oxygen that I have been gasping for,
Before I decide to close the path to my lungs tonight,

Pull the mask off of me,
So you can see past the illusion of my smile,
So you can see that I'm in need of help,
Hold me tonight,
Before you have to hold the stone with my name on it.

Sometimes people are crying for help and we don't know it.

#suicidalthoughts #cryforhelp

Chaotic world May 2016

The search

We were both searching for love,
Yet we didn't know what love was,
Because we both never felt it,
And we were never taught how to love,
We wanted this idea of love,
So it's no wonder why we plunged into each other's lives so fast,
But I guess we went to fast,
Because we didn't catch each other,
We went through each other,
Taking only the things we were fast enough to catch.

#love #burningout

Chaotic world Apr 2016

Breathless

They say love can **** you,
And it's true
love is suicide,
To fall in love is like tying a noose around your neck,
The more you fall in love,
the tighter the noose gets,
Maybe that's why I felt so breathless
Everytime I saw you smile.

#love

Chaotic world Apr 2016

Actions of the sorrow

We have all felt the pain of a wounded heart,
But it's insane how we act when the wound is open,
Some of us draw a world like no other,
A world that shows others what dwells in our minds,
Some of us play a Melody,
A melody that creates a path from heaven to our souls,

Yet there are some of us who won't see the beauty when damaged,
They listen to the sweet words of others ,
Because those sweet words create a tunnel for them,
A tunnel that leaves behind their misery,

But there are some who can't find a tunnel,
They hold themselves on cold nights forever searching the warm light at the end of a tunnel,

Maybe that's why most people who are being blind to the beauty resort to deep cuts of the skin,
Forever tally marking their wrists like a prison wall,
Waiting for the day when the guard opens their cell,
And releases them from their own hell.

Just some of the popular ways people try to comfort themselves.

#sadness #actions

Chaotic world Apr 2016

Happiness

I get the Feeling like I'm stuck in a small room,
A room filled with mirrors reflecting all the things I've done wrong,
A room surrounded by the sounds of my pain and agony,
A room that seems to cave in more and more as I grow more alone,
I was so used to being in this room,
Until you painted a door into it,
And now I got a taste of  heaven,
I just wish you were still there holding the door,
But I guess you got tired of trying to show beauty  to someone who all their life has seen ugliness
the door is still open,
But I can't make a choice,
I'm torn apart from knocking on the doors of heaven,
Or opening the gates to hell,
Im so used to the demons filling the Cracks of my heart,
That it's hard for me now to let an angel hold me.

#alone #choices

Chaotic world Apr 2016

No escape

Late at night I toss and turn,
Forever stuck in reality's hold,
With demons laying next to me,
And monsters prancing in my head.

#insomnia

Chaotic world Apr 2016

The ultimate weapon

They say sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words will never hurt me,
Yet it's words that Pierce through the skin faster than any weapon,
Your sticks and stones may break me,
Yet the pain of that can fade away,
But a single word can cause pain for eternity,
A Pain that we never forget,
A pain that forever haunts us in our sleep,
It's like a wound that never scars,
It just keeps open as a reminder,
A reminder of the day when we realized
Our hearts can be damaged,

#broken #neverforgeting