I have this idea in my mind about you and I dream about it every night AND I KNOW IT’S REAL BECAUSE HIS GHOSTS HAUNT ME IN MY DREAMS AND TELL ME THAT YOU NEED ME BUT JUST BECAUSE YOU NEED SOMEONE DOESN’T MEAN YOU LOVE THEM and I’ve seen more of your soul in my dreams then I ever will in reality because time goes by too fast for you to open up and people pass by like the cars on the freeway but dreams last forever SOMETIMES I WONDER IF YOU EVER FELT THE WAY I DO AND IF YOU DID WHAT HAPPENED BECAUSE I ONLY DO MY BEST BUT MAYBE THAT’S NOT ENOUGH and it still makes me sick when I think about the day he died because that was the day I lost you too and I’ll never get over that even if I get over the taste of *** on your lips AND THE SOUND OF ME TELLING MYSELF YOU CARE IS LOUDER THAN YOUR HEART BEAT WHEN YOU SEE ME but it’ll never drown out my body dropping to the ground in the parking lot of the church on the day of his funeral