bare in the beginning small as any seed
of recognition, more so those
who sprout in the vastness of forests surrounded
tall and taller yet
might one be
that
one who gains stature among the redwoods
or the king of younger shoots presence
small , dreams more grand , and
at once magnificence unbounded
by precedence or tradition or genetics
his seed her renown the germination
of a new day a new dawn a new
perception, a new generation
more tall in ways
the tallest the strongest the
warriors bow, the most beautiful curtsy,
in the wake.

Sandpaper sharpens the arrow
My mind grows duller with each new moon
I feel vindicated
But is that meant to change my destiny?

I hum carefully crafted melodies
While dodging the traffic of unending static
I love unconditionally
But does that mean I am loved the same?

Lavender wine enthralls scavengers
They forage for another bridge to burn
I watch it blacken and dissipate
But does apathy mean I no longer care?

My arrow is now sharper
Voices whisper, "weakling, loose the final blow"
A single tear slips from my eye
But is one arrow supposed to end this hell?

I wish I was still sitting beside him on the couch.
The IV drip counting the time and the smell of his shirt sitting in the air.
I never got to ask him what to do.
I never got to ask him how to love.
His eyes are forever shut.
And so is my heart.

The decay
you've wrought
with your doubled up beating
and distortion assaults
gives me no choice but
to fixate on new sonic romances
and I'm in love
with the way she cradles me
in that sedated groove
and the caress
of those faint record scratches
I need to
get through new time signatures
as I grow older
and apart from you

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
For I am astray and unable to find
The grace for which I need to forgive and forget

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
Silent misery drenched and undefined
Vengeance fills my lungs faster than oxygen

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
For I am simply the blind following the blind
Tripping over skeletons and shackles in this pitch black

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
Drop another coin in the wishing well
Always a devil at the bottom waiting for his due

Circles, and now I am dizzy
Faint pulse tells me to right my wrongs
To spill my soul into the void of space

Circles, and now I am weightless
It seems a shame to leave this world
To the sick, sheltered, shame of its own devices

Circles, and now I'm incomplete
Drifting further from myself, I am staring
Into the eyes of a broken down satellite

Circles, and now I'm forgotten
The truth is a vacuum in which I don't exist
While my fingers grow numb at this endless cold

Circles, always circles*
Encircling time and encircling throats
There is no more life, and there is no more death

Seeing you walk on mirrored images I dreamt in moments of pain,

And thinking that I one day would hold your hand in meadows and on top of the Eiffel Tower,

Yet I was so far from you,
And that, you could not bear.

There is comfort in our separation, as you've blossomed within love.

No opportunity for me to disagree if you are happy, secure and warm in the gravest of circumstances.

I feel you here with me, God knows your caring hands could still scrape along my face.

Who wouldn't imagine the infinite (nearly laughable now) possibilities that could have spawned out of our seasonal tryst, but let's give praise to the unexpected joys shot out of reality.

All pieces in place of a puzzle carved out of some improvisation.

I crawled into bed with death last night
I let her dark fingers wander my naked flesh
She whispered in my ear as she held my bones
                                                           ­              I let her have me
I touched her lower back last night
I let death climb on top of me and cry in pleasure
She moaned aloud and said my name with love
                                                            ­            I let her have me
I reveled in her cold embrace last night
I let her fall asleep heavy in my arms and my dreams
She became my tomb, my grave, my other side
                                                            ­            I let her have me
                                                              ­          All of me
She took my breath away
I rode her into the abyss