She cuts deep
She cuts often

If she doesn't find hope soon,
she'll lay in coffin.

I am 1,000 pounds,
weighed down by memories,
by crushing defeat,
by failure,
by loss,
by regret...
yet I am weightless,
empty,
a trophy in a dusty case,
my varnish dim,
no longer new,
no longer shiny,
I struggle to stay afloat,
but I am still swimming,
because I see the lighthouse,
tall and shining.
a gleam of light beckoning from it's highest point,
come to me
swim to me
I am the way out
and so I tread.

Summer's warm currents retreat
the advancing brisk amber sunsets.

Submerging the world under
the reign of enduring starry nights.

The maples blush as Autumn whispers
the gentle lullaby of Winter's sweet breath.

Erasing Summer's memory with a crimson brush
preparing the golden landscape's long frigid rest.

~~~

i'm going to put on the same pants you slid off of me
and melt inside a little.
getting ready for work never felt so ****.

I descended slowly so long ago.
The memory of how
and why it began floated
away with the flotsom on
the warm surface currents.

On the frigid sea floor of my mind
crushed beneath the pressure
of liquid self loathing.
A kingdom of cold piercing
darkness was my domain
and there I stayed.

"Please, come back."
Her words echoed in the depth.
And it began.

A slow ascension passed the
darkened depth through murky grey.
The grasping demons that preyed
on my spirit lost their hold as I rose
beyond their reach.

Faster I climbed.
My soul expanded with every passing meter.
Pushing away all that held me down
and breached the warm wavy surface
where it all began.

Golden rays and azure blue skies
fill my sight as I float with the current.
Miles from shore with hope as my
only compass.

The journey to my redemption now begins
with you as my guide.

~~~


KCsPoetryContest  depression  recovery

So much of life
Is wasted
Nine to Five

Exhaustion cripples
Down time, anxiety
Controls the next

Worry about bills
The looming certainty
And lingering doubt

Up at early
The pattern
Hardly broken

A vacation spent
Away; life's return
Still follows how

The training of
Nine to five
Work and life

But coffee copes
When the restless
Rise

it's not what it looks like
no, i promise
it's not what it looks like
less of my relationship with gravity
and more how i occupy reality