I am a walking disorder,
what I touch I break.

Take me somewhere nice,
where I can scream and not be heard;
cry and not be seen.

Take me somewhere
I can pour the pain,
spout these nonsense to the drain.

Take me somewhere I can sink,
vanish within the abysmal depths
of never ending sapphire;
where decay is a fable of forsaken
times

Take me somewhere nice,
where Death is but a whisper in
the receding breezes of Time.

Two dice tumbling, over and over
Shaken together, rolled over leather,
Always coming up a double six.
Enjoy this game, this sweet duet,
Revel in the harmony of chance.
Together, we will always be the most, the best,
Without you, I roll one,
A sad, lost, lonely die.

Darkness tends to illuminate the meaningful
bits we seem to forget with the constancy of
light which makes us blind from the blaze
of all beauty and imperfection;

but it is only in the solemn moments we
remember what truly matters, thus it casts its
shadow over the things that blinds us and serves
as a memento of the significant when grief engulf us.

There is a little girl
That rests in my bones
Inhabits
My soul
Hides within me
Peaks out through the cracks of my ribcage
And
Every so often
Reminds me
Who I am
I call myself woman
Now and then
Give my body to men
Who promise me fleeting moments of attention
I live in routine
Put on the charade that is adulthood
I almost forget sometimes
That I am not grown
That most of it is false
A cover
I hide under the covers at night
And still fear the dark
Conquer it with a glowing light shaped like a rubber duck
I sleep alone
But the pillow of my late dog besides my head
Keeps me safe
I am a person of habit
Afraid that if I alter the slightest details
More than just the content of my sandwiches will change
Change has never been a close friend of mine
I know him just well enough
To invite him in
But his arrival always seems to come
When I least expect it
I still cry
When I get overwhelmed
And the thought of unfamiliar hands
Makes me shudder
I am still learning
How to trust
When I had always been taught
To not believe everything you are told
I've recently realized
That soon enough
I'll have to confront the reality that is life
So for now
I'm choosing to protect
The little girl within me
Wrap my arms around her innocence
Shelter her from the hurricane like storms
From those who have come to knock her down
I'm choosing
To hold on to her
For my greatest fear of all
Is letting go.