when I, or you, wake up and go downstairs
to see our parents in the morning and they say
I love you, how do you do, and you say
I love you, slept well, how about you?
and they say, good, me too, and you go to school.

You go to school where they tie and fasten your noose
and pull you under gray skies until you swear
you'll lose your mind, you go to school where you lie
and wait- covert eyes, surreptitiously despise that you have to
whisper to me, between closed walls and closed doors, I love you.

In this world of rules and halfway angry, halfway desperate
people, we build palaces so as not to see the little black box
underneath it all, this indestructible fortress, where no one can hide
or conceal, every time you open it, you get more and more undressed
naked, under the glaring light. (But hold me tight.) I love you.

when, in storms and cliffs, half past raging and half through sadness
what can we do to end this madness, when even in
the depths of our beings, even in the darkest of magic
we can't find the strength to say it, I can't open my mouth
because I've said it too much or too little, maybe, but I love you.

When the spires and pillars and holy desires clash, and this
Church cannot stand on sand, what is the one thing they've forgotten
they say that marriage is less, and more, too, but they don't
even know what they mean, after eternity's lost all hope of despair, what
is the one phrase that their God cannot bear? I love you.

In alleyways of the heart, in broken and forgotten verse- in drunkenness
and dying, what slips in through the cracks that the light gets in? What
scandal is too vulnerable to be wounded? Why do they call it sin? the blood
that flows under the current, between the leaves of book pages and underneath
pulses beats from long ages, (please have the nerve to say it), I love you.

If, at the end of time, when there are no more rhymes
when the forests are burnt to ashes and all life left has died
when breath no longer rattles through the bones of the dirt
and the darkness has quenched all of our God-lit thirst
what have we left on this Earth? I love you.

i want to be with you
whether it is loud
or in silence
i want to be with you
in the evening, in the morning
and in between times

i want to be with you
whether evidently
or in between lines
i want to be with you
to speak, to think
to cry,  to laugh, to live

i want to be with you
no matter if it rains
or the sun is shining
i want to be with you
whether sitting, standing
or lying

i want to be with you
and experience much
taking and giving a lot
i want to be with you
in all times, in all places
for every reason

I have a tag on tumblr
specifically called 'parenting'
so that if and when the time comes
I remember what I needed when I was younger
and I can be that person for my child.
I write love letters to my future spouse
sometimes in pen and sometimes on the typewriter
so that if and when the time comes
they know how long I've waited for them,
they know that they're a dream come true
and how amazing it is that I can wake up to see them next to me.

I'm getting tired of saying *****
Or using the phrase '**** my ****'
I'm tired of talking about grades
I'm through hearing about white shirts
Can we come up with anything else
To have a friendly, fun conversation?

Your mother and I have a lot of trust for you
We know you wouldn't do this but we thought we'd reiterate
If you know anyone dating a black man,
You are to tell us and will never talk to that person again
I grew increasingly infuriated by this chat
So what if it were an Asian man? Would you let me date them?
My dad shifts, shocked I would have a counter question
Well I guess that would be okay, only because
They come to America striving to do their best
However, if prefer it'd be a white man
You see. Black people do not try. They have attitudes
And it's becoming a fad to hang out with them
It took all of my will to not lunge at him
My mother chimes in,
The the bad attitudes of some black people
Pull down the reputation for the entire race
It shouldn't be that way, I mutter
My dad leans forward, why are you sticking up for them
He begins to scream, my trust has dropped!
Stop trying to argue because their is no argument!
No matter what you say it'll be a NO
And it seems like your being suspicious
So to clear things up, YOU WILL BE KICKED OUT OF THIS HOUSE
If you ever date a black person.
The tears flow like a broken pipe and I shutter,
*Not because I can't date a black man, but because of the inequality and racism that my parents reek of

At the end of the day,
I can lay my head
against a pillow that
smells of sweet vanilla
and know that
you
are
mine.

I had never felt that before,
the feeling of complete euphoria.
I wasn't myself;
I wasn't in my own body.

2:30 AM and we snuck out,
went around the pond,
and the smoke poured into my lungs.

I was trembling,
a smile plastered across my face.
I laughed at every joke,
zoned out for a few seconds.

Eyes bloodshot,
pupils dilated.
Hungry as ****,
and happier than I've ever been.

I realized I was in love;
all I could think about was him.

I fell asleep,
best sleep of my life I might add.

I think I've found
a new escape.

Him drowning in drink
Her trying again
Them relapsing
Going back
Coming back
Most of all, them leaving me

What does it say about me, then, that to make life would take mine away?