Cold hands in my front pocket
warms parts of me
i'd admit it.
Kiss your forehead,
genuine,
I fell in love with
someone i shouldn't.
And saw our fate
flashing lights before us
peripheral view,
I ignored it.
Kept bliss in motion
in ignorant standstill
earthly desires
pinky promise,
flushed in rouge
severed faster
than i wanted it to.

she said: " there's no real peace in revenge. "
i could never hurt you like you hurt me.
i could never make the pain beautiful or seem like it is worth it either. 
 i love you.

But sometimes doesn't frequent the way the love stories make you out to be
Show me you know the difference between the boy in you and maturity.
I feel forgotten, like the jewelry in my wallet, swimming amongst valueless coins that will one day come in handy, so I keep them there in case exact change is the easy way out. Ironically, change is never easy.
I'm your easy way out. Here when you need me. Here when you want me. But I always want you. It isn't fair. Why am I an option? Why was she there? No one else has slept in my bed. No one else has appeared in my head.
Sometimes you're the one when you decide I'm worth your time.
Sometimes you're the one if you have nowhere else to hide.

But sometimes is not a word in fairytales
and I am a dreamer.

Like a beggar feeling for gold in the dark
I mosey in the shadows searching for the scent of bliss
Blind to everything but my own thought
I skirt the edge of light and dark
A stuttering heartbeat
I rest upon a sturdy form and begin to flutter
Slowly
I come away from my stupor and tilt my head
Upward
Illuminated by a golden sphere
A moth grasping at God
Gripped in the glow I am light
Reflecting unto faded stars
We
Inanimate forms buzzing along to the
Dull hum of the universe.

And the time will pass me bye
As i sit around and wonder why,
As to whats lifes plan in minds eye.

Schooling perhaps to strike it rich,
End my struggle and find lifes glitch, take that life you're now my *****.

But not so fast as things are known,
Family wrought to cast the stone,
To **** me dry, to leave unsewn.

Raised by wolves, the weak shall die, or find another, to hear thy cry,
Found another, relief, a sigh.

Marriage bells ring as love unfolds
Secrets rise and become untold,
Was i loved before her heart grew cold?

There once was a time that I couldn't go a day without seeing your face
Oh how I wish to go back to such a simpler place
Where we could sit and stare at each other and not say a single word
Nothing would be said but everything could be heard
Everything was going well and our future looked bright
Until, oh until, reality struck that night
The love in your eyes had started to fade and the way you looked at me just wasn't the same
More and more, things just changed
Even the way you said my name
Then, one day you finally cracked...
Said that this was going nowhere and you started to pack
The love of my life was walking out of the door while I was picking up my shattered heart from off of the floor
Years and years of loving you endlessly
I never thought that you would leave me
It happens in movies and happens in books but when it happened to me, my whole world shook
Time went by and the pain inside wasn't there but still some nights, I wish I could run my fingers through your hair
To have your lips pressed against mine and  you could call me yours forever
We would talk about the future of us being together
But I've moved on from that; the past is the past
Because I realized that nothing is really meant to last...