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1.6k · Sep 2023
Earth
Allison Hoswell Sep 2023
The Earth,
The highest form of honesty
Earth has no motive, it is just being
Pure integrity, pure electricity
Sending out dynamic forces to its occupants
It runs through the ground
And is transferred
To you, to me
And just like that we are pulled
A smile from across the room
A magnetic within our souls
Unintentional, innocently planted
electrifying
The highest form of honesty
Mistaken for the ultimate betrayal
485 · Jun 2019
Drifting pt 1 & 2
Allison Hoswell Jun 2019
Pt1
And just like that I’m drifting
Drifting to a safer place
An unknown space
In the sea of love

Pt2
Our home has burned
We loved, we learned
It’s time to rebuild
But it cannot be filled
Not the same at least
I leave in peace
Slow steady pace
Drifting to a safer place
381 · May 2019
4. Bargaining
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Bargaining
You changed, I changed
the situation changed
For good or for bad?
Kneeling, begging
God
Make the pain stop
guide him
guide me
258 · Aug 2019
Unknown
Allison Hoswell Aug 2019
If you never take the path unknown,
You will never know the path worth knowing.
Said this one day while taking an unknown path and then unknown trail navigating through a forest
257 · May 2019
5. Depression
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Myla and Bryson
I never would have named him Bryson anyway
Imagined them playful, smiling, loving
an essence of us
Imagined green grass and a fence to keep
The dog in
Imagined late nights, tv is the only light, as we cuddle
Shining on our family
Happiness
But there is no Myla or Bryson
Nobody’s playful, smiling, loving
There is no dog
There is no family
From the 7 stages of grief
255 · May 2019
7. Acceptance
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Deep breath, exhale
And the forces of nature will listen
Walking and the worlds  behind me
Like wind is pushing so I can come through
Kindness, confidence, love
It’s going to be okay
251 · May 2019
Poolside
Allison Hoswell May 2019
It’s all gray
Grainy
Unorganized
This isn’t her
The water is crystal clear
Blue, her favorite color
And it’s so pretty
Like her soul
The sol
So comforting
249 · May 2019
3. Anger
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Your shoes, your Xbox, what’s the most value?
I want to destroy what you love the most
Because you destroyed what I love the most
The real problem
For both of us
is what we love the most
From 7 stages of grief
227 · Jun 2019
Drifting pt 3
Allison Hoswell Jun 2019
She needs strength to not hit send
To not open what had closed
To focus
Right and wrong never felt so gray
She wants to love him
She wants to forget all the lies
She wants to believe he’s changed
And he has
He’s actually better than before
He’s focused
She’s excited
He’s back plus more
This is good
But there’s a wave of confusion
And it only takes a moment
To be washed away from him
The current is strong
The focus is gone
She’s drifting to a safer place
Wrote this while trying to rebuild with my boyfriend who cheated and lied. He’s doing so much better and we’re happy and stronger, but I’m nervous it’s not enough for me. That what has been destroyed cannot be fixed. I’m so back and forth.
222 · May 2019
6. Testing
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Confusion anger prying impatience
It’s all gasoline for a fire
A fire is only as dangerous as you allow it to be
I can feel heat radiating from your body
Eye to eye, pounding hearts,
I know it’s not just me
Allison Hoswell Jul 2019
The air is thick of steam. He always forgets to turn on that fan. The one that helps remove all the moisture in the air. He never flips it. He’s not thinking about that. He’s thinking of scrubbin’ clean after a long day. A new song on apple music he can brag that he put me onto.  And his most important, what’s for dinner? Saint louis wing company, garlic parmesan. He’s crazy right?  Traditional hot is the best. The most attractive thing about his mind? He’s happy. He’s at peace. He’s not caught up on life’s details, but about the big picture. Straight to the point, no detours.  The way his mind works, I envy that process. But me… I’m anxious. And i examine. So as he exits the shower, with his single white beard hair he refuses to pluck, I smile. His energy transfers into my soul. And he lays on top of me, and whispers that he’s been thinking about me that whole shower.
138 · May 2019
I’ll have another
Allison Hoswell May 2019
Music in the background
Conversations near by
My mind is occupied
But is it really?
I’m hurting and nobody knows
This is what I’m suppose to do
the idea sounds good
This is what I’m suppose to do
I’ll have another
136 · May 2019
1. Shock
Allison Hoswell May 2019
I imagine your mind is drifting away
You’re only in the next room, the same body I know
I love you when our bodies were close
Were farther than we’ve ever been
The same body but a different perspective
You look different

— The End —