i swept yesterday under the rug
let horrors of tomorrow interrupt
and the love they say today erupts
every new day from dusk to dusk
hates how i lay here dulled by dust

lying
like i’m smiling
trying to find
the fine line
lining all
across the truth
hear how my heart
here hoped to die when
tyrants tried
my tired mind and
mine wasn’t
triumph
tell my youth
sing in the silence
break into timing
see
truth wasn’t lying
when she swore on
me and you
she’d die when
our time did
it never lies
this time
it’s true

i am sorry
for the bruises under your eyes
i'd say i wish they were mine
but we wear the same sleepless wounds
pretending all is fine;
there's blood in your mouth,
your tongue tastes like copper
it's like kissing pennies
but far, far softer.

i am sorry
this is not the life you were promised,
baby eyes wide with wonder
as your mother's words tried for honest;
i wonder if she knew
what the world would bring unto you,
the things your father would do,
the ways his friend would ruin you
all the wasted love
and all the terrible tears
looking at the sky above,
empty bottles counting the years

a highly praised one
raised right by my homemade love
came to shame the pain we come from

time’s been and still is too tough
i drink enough till i think i’m enough
fill my gut till i’m drunk on your love

just enough
to forgive
my blood

like my heart drops
my tears form clots
and the humming stops

i can’t sink or sing anymore
write or stream my ink anymore
i think it unlinked from my thoughts

i don’t think
i can outrun its bars
my verdict from the world

i’m not what they deserve
vermin in their herd
i heard

im what makes
their perfect
imperfect

so summon my courage
kiss my sober kosher thoughts
till i sink slow to kiss this morbid
ocean floor.

not in heaven
but when i must admit
myself to hell it’s
been where wit’s end exists

i need a drink
the double vision it
sets me on a single path
where there’s no room for quits

its true the price is this
cancerous abyss
of self-absorbedness
but sad certain agony
is better than inconsistent bliss

stay
unless you've gone
then stay
until you've known  
that weak is not calm
and strength is not war
and hard hearts are strong
but strongest of all
are those who love all
for first they broke
and then they thawed
and then they found
peace in their warmth.

someone wake up
i've been sitting here
near the first stair
someone must be up

there's this thin ceiling
in between
beneath
you
me

i know you've never seen
my nose or my eyes seep
anywhere near the bottom

but this red sea
is the bled tears
i've shed relentlessly
second after century

i know you hear my screams
if i shout any louder
i'll see more sharply

so don't brush them off
come up with unjust cause
or rush to judge
your gut's wise walls

who are you
to hush
God.

nothing
like me
so please
descend from heaven
past hell and into me

love
nothing
like
me
silence me
set me free

and i will love
nothing
like
you
eternally