I've become a coroner and my bed's become a casket
I've got myself nailed in for a long stay inside my head
I've realised I'm the only one mourning
And for flowers to bloom upon my grave
I need to cremate this self pitty

Making the most of my day
Riding back and fourth from station's
139 poems wrote
But the route never changes
Blasting pop punk anthems to get me by
Instead of dwelling in my room furthering connection with the outside
On mission with no destination
To find the people or place that feels like home
A community found when the lights go down and the band  starts to play
My 140th poem wrote on the same bus heading the opposite way
Slightly less lost

Good moments are like tattoo removals
Gone and easy to forget
But the bad ones haunt constantly
Like the art that tarnishers my skin

The ocean becomes my temperament vicious and uncalculated
Breaching boundaries and flooding streets with emotions  
Tidal wave's pull me under
But I still feel your light no matter how deep I delve
You became a new sun when my head convinced me my world had ended
And after all this time I've realized saving my self Is more important than saving grace so strike me down if I'm the devil in myself
Causing plague and disease in my own head .

I try too hard to give everything and leave my needs unspoken
Because I'm scared of stepping on toes
It becomes a cycle of me apologising
If I choose to speak up
So walk over me
Because I tried to hold you up and fell underneath you.

From inside I'll build a prison
Bricks of self deprivation and hate
There won't be bars on the windows
Just flowery curtains
Because it's a choice to neglect the light of day
Piles of new clothes built up
But I'll kick around in this old hood
And watch the days fade
I honestly believe I'll look back  and dwell on the days I waste
But it's hard to break a cycle created by a mental cage.

I do sincerely believe the words I write in the moment's I write them
But sometimes the weight capsizes the boat sending me off course
To a destination unplanned
But the original idea isn't lost
If you push through the woods
Cut through vines and shrubbery to the better ending
Or leave a trail behind to help the next adventures find there path.