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He was building muscles to be strong,
but I was strengthening my heart to be strong...
for once
i want
to flaunt
my scars
cross all
the bars
fall to rise
again
forget all
the pain
be a little
dramatic
let go of
the arctic
defense
the perfect
pretense
just be me
small stature
with a messy bun
a difficult nature
the weird one
lose fitting shirts
hell no to skirts
no hint of concealer
i'm not a revealer
yes i'm boring
yes i'm lame
but if loyalty is what
you're looking for
then i'm game
i've got shades

to me

you've got shades

to you

still we're

the same black

created from

different hues
In the present at this moment
As you look back at the years

May you feel satisfied, relax in peace
And there be very few tears

Remember that there are achievements
Great and small in many layers

Many lives that you have touched
Some from far, some very near

And You remain undisclosed
In some hearts and flourish in other

The timing is never right and the moment is gone,
For in the dark, behind the eyes,
Love continues to whisper

The dilemma to not cause a ripple
Makes a scream turn to a whimper

But isn't it a blessing to know you are loved
And to be cherished without any fear

The uncertainty around makes me want to declare,
A love that was never lost and will never be found
I'm busy busy busy
I'm late I'm late I'm late
I've got to meet a rabbit
I've got to meet my fate

For if you trip and stumble
And take a long long fall
You might take some comfort
In the writing on the wall

It says the cakes a lie!
The roses never were red!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
The last words that they said

There's no time for fantasy
The world's out of hand
Visit Alice another time
Curse that wonderland

We're living in the matrix
Dot dash, dot dot dot dash
We just have to accept it
As we wait for it to crash

One foot in and one foot out
Abstractify, you lazy lout
Yes, I'm sure reality's an illusion
But I can't afford to live in confusion
Just peeping through the keyholes of the doors of perception.

Also, if anyone is curious, dot dash, dot dot dot dash is "AV" in morse code, which felt particularly appropriate.

~5/6/2021
Your suffering does not make you special,
How you overcome it makes you that way.
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