And
I’ll never be beautiful for anyone,
Not even for you,
I will never hide my chickenpox,
Grind me to sand, and I'll shout to the wind,
Wash me! Wash me away!

I’ll never pretend that I am pretty for anyone,
Not even for you,
I’ll let my skin dry like the Atacama desert,
I’ll let the harsh mountain storm bite my face,
The eagles eat my flesh on the tower of silence, so
There is nothing left to dream about,
Not even bone dust for the rain,

I’ll fight like gladiators, not to be beautiful for anyone,
Not even for you,
I won’t let the clouds overshadow my scalp,
I’ll pull right now, one by one, every hair follicle,

What you ask me to be is not beauty, it is a butterfly
That flies and flies around a light bulb
Until it dies

A shadow that weaves white nights,
I will not invent myself to be pretty for anyone,
Not even for you,

If you wish to enter my blood,
You have to swim in the imperishable waters,

Haley’s comets
Approaching separating
Matters of fact
Wolfs are howling
A wretched world
That having it’s way with my soul
Looking for someone
To take the keys and drive
Looking for
A purpose outside my wasteland
Too turn the pages forward
For the backstage
Blues to leave my stage
My paper lanterns are
Burning to ashes
Wasting away
In my self absorbed addictions
Inexplicable behaviors
Like a heckler that
Won’t stop talking
Wears me like a
A mask I can’t remove
The demons
In each bottle rattle my cage
After each hit I take
Can’t shake
The stench that permeates
It’s like the acid tears I cry
I see the decaying breath
I breathe counting
Down to the seconds
When the coffin will call
And I will answer
All consuming overwhelming me
Awaiting a revival
For my peaceful recital to start
Dancing in my shadows

LIFELINES

her dead husband
trapped
behind glass

laughs
from his
faded photograph

he stands
in a field
of wallpaper roses

she knits & knits
as if she was knitting
Time

Time is cast on
she never
drops a stitch

"Purl..purl...purl"
her tabby
purrs

at night she unravels
the day's knitting
as if disposing of all

that wasted time
Time is cast off
tomorrow she will begin again

the endless endless knitting
that is neither
scarf or cardigan or a... nothing

a car headlight sweeps
across her husband's face
brings him alive for an instant

and then he is
dead
forever again

the knitting needles
pierce the blue
ball of wool

that will be tomorrow
sleep at last is
kind to her

she hopes Death
will find her soon
so that

tomorrow
need not be
knitted. . .

*

A lifeline is a strand of yarn that is inserted into the work so that, if an error is encountered, it is easy to rip back to that point. Lifelines are often used in lace knitting. Leave lifelines in your work until the piece is complete. To insert a lifeline, thread a tapestry needle with…