Back in the old days...

I miss the good old days when the only pain I ever felt was was scraped knees and f*cked up elbows...
The days when going to the doctor meant getting a lollipop or a sweet.

The days when I thought my shadow was spying me and that I could become a superhero just by using any towel as a cape.

Those days when I could wear anything I wanted to because the other kids didn't care about what I wore; And that if I had shoes that lit up in the darkness I was "THE ****!"

And in the car, I miss the times I would get angry at my older sister for taking the front seat. The times when getting your pencil or rubber stolen was the only real drama in the world.
And to get Girls; all you needed to do was run fast...(**** I was slow as a turtle)

Wait wait wait!! First, you need to lose some................?

Profound:
Do you understand what it means to be profound. Profound is nothing that comes from a book learning. If you are to be profound, it comes at a early age and leads to insight.

Insight:
The ability to look into something. Having it figured out before you start it.
Ongoing problem solving. The ability to see your near future and wanting to gain knowledge

Knowledge:
To gain and understand right from wrong. To know what it is to gain intelligence, correct decision making. This can lead to visions.

Visions:
To understand what it takes to get to where you want to go. To set your projection on life. How to gather intelligence.

Intelligence:
Research and the gathering of information to get you what you want out of life. A way to conquer your fears and questions about life. This will lead you to realistic goal and dreams.

Goals and Dreams:
Set your goals and dreams. One goal and one dream. You hit your goal and then your dream becomes your next goal, Then set your next dream. Before you know you will be on your way to the top of the life's learning chain. That's were wisdom comes in.

Wisdom:
I won't explain it, you can go to he Webster's dictionary and read the definition 1 for wisdom. It reads: see Bible

They are  other meanings these days and that is because people in today's society are losing their values and don't want to credit GOD for wisdom

I think about all the terrible things that are happening in life....................

And I realized that these things don't prove to us that God is present; They prove to us that God is absent...

My family has been stuck in the same ***** old slum for decades now.

My father is a electrician. He fixes stoves, radio's, tv's and sells them for alcohol no wonder everytime I get home the house looks bigger.

I was only 9years old when I started picking up my fathers habitats: like the broken pieces of whiskey bottles he throws around the living room every time his favorite team loses.
I picked up my fathers habit to swear, hit and poke a woman if ever she doesn't give me what I want.
And every Monday my father loses his voice from shouting too much on previous weekend and I also picked up his habit to NOT think before I speak...

I'd leave if I ever met someone worth leaving for,
I'd leave this hole if I didn't have to hide what was on my mind all the time
I'd leave if someone made me believe I'm worth the effort
I'd leave if I could stop expecting pain if I develop feelings
Translation, I'll leave this hole for something with some meaning

I'll leave here if I can meet someone that can quiet
all the nervous doubts twitches and tics that go on in my brain
if someone would accept me and leave my heart intact
I'd walk out of this hole with no question, no looking back

but since this hasn't happened and I doubt it ever will
I'm not leaving my hole so I won't have another void to fill

I never think much about the fact that I am black.
I know I am black.
Like I know I am a girl,
Like I know I am an American,
Like I know I am nineteen.
It is a fact; I am black.

I hate when people say I am not.
My parents are black.
Their parents are black.
We are black.
Look at my skin,
It's dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not be black?
I am black.

I hate when people say I don't 'act' black.
How does one act to be considered black?
How am I acting? How is it not black?
Look at my skin,
It's dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not act black?
I am black.

I hate when people say I speak like a white person.
A way of speaking is not exclusive to race.
I am not white.
I do not speak like a white person.
My words are coming out of my black mouth.
I speak properly,
The way my black parents raised me to.
Look at my skin,
Its dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not speak black?
I am black.

I HATE when people say I am a white person trapped in a black body.
I have NEVER heard anything more insulting.
I am NOT trapped.
This color is NOT a cell.
I wear it proudly.
Look at MY skin,
It is DARK and it is BEAUTIFUL!
How could I ever be trapped?
I am black.

I am in no way white,
Nor do I ever want to be.
I am black
And black is beautiful