Hard to pin us down, an interloper built for one cause,
to disrupt all the visions that we stir around.
Rip the motivation from our skins, mix it up in a ***.
A stew blended with just numbers,
throw them in, brains, limbs and all.
We're not using the knowledge,
so let us pay to devolve.
Sinking deeper into the ground from which we came.
Once a mystical entity, now a puddle of disgust.
Mixing in with the rain, and rust.
No longer recognizable, no longer do we posses trust.
Inspirations and morals dissipating in the vapor,
vanishing into dust.
A name not worthy to remember,
a story never to be told.
An idea we can't fathom,
a sinister manipulator we can't tame.
A distortion of our dreams,
something so vain.
Creating an algorithm of words,
creating a tale of reason.
Leaving something stranded to ponder,
while wandering in the chaos,
reminiscing in the mind.
A creature seasoned,
helpless,
bitter,
old.........out of time

I will go into a hole
a deep abyss
wet or dry?
dark or light?
drained, not elated
I will be gone
I will be graced with nothing
I will be buried by copious amounts of air dirt and water
I will be complete with nothing added
I will be completed with silence in mind
a black hole ignited with color
a void that I would welcome
a hell so heavenly I would float into it willingly
a palace not envied
but a place better than here.

My mother should be an author
She carves her soul into millions of pieces
Leaving it behind all of the family photos
When I see my mother
I see a woman
Who wants to hide her soul in a needle
Just so the screaming can stop in her mind,
These bottles are rattling in the living room
You see they have put shackles on her heart,
She can't love anymore
Without having ***** in her water bottle.

Where is she hiding her beer?
I feel like my mother is giving me a scavenger hunt
From the shards of glass that were left on the baseball fields
My mother used to take me to.

You know she always wasn't like this
She was strong minded and had a big heart
Tonight I will tell you the story of a woman
Who lost her soul to the Keystones to the Miller Lites
To the ****** Mary’s.
Let's rewind time
See ******* the soul in ten years

10- I look into my mother's eyes and I start to cry
Because I'm looking at a woman who I don't know anymore

9- I refused to bail her out of jail again
Because I'm afraid her kidney will fail if she drinks again

8- My mother staggered into the theater and disrupted the whole play,
My cast mates turned to me and asked, isn't that your mother?

7- I had to hold my mothers hand
Because she was throwing up the cocktail of drugs and alcohol

6- Daddy had to get mom out of jail she was drinking again

5- My mother throws the bottle across the room
And told me the reason why she drinks is because I'm Autistic

4- My mother overslept for my piano recital,
I didn't think it was a big deal
But I remember she spent the whole night crying
With a wine glass in her hand.

3- Mommy I didn't know your prescription came in a needle

2- Mommy the prescription say 2 pills a day
why are you taking 6?

1- My mother went to the doctor
Found out that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis
I don't know what that means,
But I know she will still be strong right?

0- She took me to a Dodger game for my birthday.
I remember Sammy Sosa hitting a home run that game
She told me that the only person that can **** your soul is yourself

Stop trying to remember his scent, he smelled like summer and reminds you of the time he made you laugh so hard, you snorted out milk on that dead, hazy day.

2. Don't waste your day trying to decipher what colour his eyes were, it'll only remind you of the galaxies and constellations that you once saw in his eyes

3. Stop trying to retrace the shape of his mouth in the middle of the night, you'll choke on your tongue trying to taste the mint he devoured seconds before pulling you in for a kiss

4. Stop reliving the times you clasped hands together, the glass plate will fall off your trembling hands.

5. Burn this list, admit that the galaxies and constellations shining in his eyes were wilted, the one in yours are bursting with fire. Remember on the dead, hazy day his laugh sounded like nails running down a chalkboard. Remember when you kissed, the weeds growing from his mouth entangled the roses blooming in yours.

Realize that one day, another boy is going to come and plant daisies where he left behind thorns.