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I hate talking...

But i have a lot to say.

Im very rude...

But i tell people i dont know to have a nice day with every ounce of my heart.

Im very shy...

But im inquisitive, curious, amicable, funny, and usually the conversation starter.

Im cautious...

Yet completely impulsive.

Im clean... And neat....!

But sometimes im too lazy for a shower......

4 days at a time which is repulsive....

Im energetic...

But im too in love with my couch to show you.

Im aggressive...

But im too empathetic and laid back to hurt you...

I love my life...

But it hards to accept the trials...

I want a wife....

......i dont want a wife.....

I want a family....

But its hard to make one when youve never had one....

Hmmm....  

Maybe i should wait....
 Aug 2018 Sirena
Pablo Neruda
When I cannot look at your face
I look at your feet.
Your feet of arched bone,
your hard little feet.
I know that they support you,
and that your sweet weight
rises upon them.
Your waist and your *******,
the doubled purple
of your *******,
the sockets of your eyes
that have just flown away,
your wide fruit mouth,
your red tresses,
my little tower.
But I love your feet
only because they walked
upon the earth and upon
the wind and upon the waters,
until they found me.
 Nov 2015 Sirena
Theia Gwen
Anorexia was the most attentive
Girlfriend anyone could ask for
And I fell hard for her
I fell for for 500 calories a day,
The sense of control it gave me
Compliments from girls I'd never talked to before
Doctors so pleased that I was finally "healthy"
That feeling,
Of stepping on the scale
And realizing that I took up less space
Than when I'd stepped on the day before
The feeling of water hitting an empty stomach
The hunger pangs
That secretly thrilled me
The thrill of the lies
The ones that became ever so easy
To slip off my tongue
The thrill of a secret love affair with death
I fell for an abuser
I fell...
Literally
Bruises lined my body
From bumping into walls
Because my body was so
Malnourished I couldn't
Walk down a hallway
Fell down a rabbit hole-
Fell down into a world I couldn't escape-
Thigh gaps, thinspiration, tips and tricks to
Hide this wonderland in your head
Walking headfirst into Anorexia was like walking
Into a haunted house
It's fun and exhilarating at first
It's a game, it's harmless
And then you realize that the doors
Are barred and it dawns on you
That ringing the doorbell of death
Was not the best idea
I am a study in skinny does not make you happy
The 5 pounds you wanted to lose
Turns to 10
Turns to 20
Turns to...
I am a study in
Every inch of your body being a warzone
Of standing in front of a mirror
Seeing nothing but a piece of meat
Taking up too much space
I am a study in calculation
I am a study in lying
I am a study in not dead, but not alive
I am a study in starvation
I am a study in falling out of love
 Nov 2015 Sirena
Kj
dating a writer
 Nov 2015 Sirena
Kj
dating a writer
is like guessing the weather.
you think you know what you'll get,
but you never do.

you never know
because

she'll create a hero
from your weaknesses

and she'll write a great character,
from every last flaw.

she'll create a thousand plots  
from your worst nightmares.

she'll take every last thing you hate
and create something you'll love.

she'll turn your anger
into confessions of adoration,

and she'll make you,
everything you're not.

but worst of all,
she'll leave you wondering-
is it you she's in love with,
or things she's created from you?

but here's the beauty of it:

if you date a writer,
you'll never die.
 Aug 2015 Sirena
Brandi R Lowry
I am love
I am hate
I am fear
I am fate

I am trees
I am ground
I am silence
I am sound

I am stars
I am night
I am sun
I am light

I am you
I am me
I am they
I am we

I am above
I am below
I am within
I am soul
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