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MissingKid Nov 2018
I'm scared of happiness
It Always Leaves
I'm scared of loving other people
They Always Vanish
I notice that the things
That unravel a smile across
My Lips Always Fade Away
Sadness is like my best friend

I imagine that the most deadly things
In life that are permanent; they never
leave, or vanish,
But the things that unravel a
Smile across my lips always
Leave
MissingKid Dec 2018
i like you, but i'm scared you will hurt me.
i like you, but i'm scared i misread all
your acts.
i like you but i'm scared you don't feel
the same.
i like you, but i'm scared i'll like you
more
i like you, but i'm scared...

i'm scared i'll love you & you don't
love me back.

like the other person who did.
MissingKid Dec 2018
Help, I lost myself again
But I remember you
Don't come back, it won't end well
But I wish you'd tell me too
Our love is six feet under
I can't help but wonder
If our grave was watered by the rain
Would roses bloom?
Could roses bloom
Again?
Retrace my lips
Erase your touch
It's all too much for me
Blow away
Like smoke in air
How can you die carelessly?
Our love is six feet under
They're playing our sound
Laying us down tonight
And all of these clouds
Crying us back to life
But you're cold as a knife
Six feet under
I can't help but wonder
If our grave was watered by the rain
Bloom
Bloom
Again
Help, I lost myself again
But I remember you
MissingKid Nov 2018
I am your Skin
& I itch & I ache.
"I bear with all your hardships,
I wear your mistakes.

I am your Skin
& I grow this scar tissue
because if you bleed out,
it would **** me to miss you.

I am your Skin
I will heal until you are free.
I belong to you.
Please be kind with me."
3 months clean from self harm today!!!!!!!!!! :)
MissingKid Nov 2018
how did this happen?
i thought i was happy.
why would i do this?
is my life really this meaning less?
i took it without thinking.
please forgive me
HELP ME!!!!!!
i don't know why i did this.
will they even forgive me?
i cant even forgive myself.
i dont have much time left.
so hear me now.
im sorry...
MissingKid Nov 2018
A happy soul is the best
Shield for this cruel world
MissingKid Jan 2019
As she lies bleeding on the floor
I promised I would do no more
Harm to Myself I really tried
But even I knew that I had lied
Now I am dying and no one is home
I has no help I is all alone
I wants to get up and fix it all
But there is no one left for her to call
Now as I dies on the floor
I hears everyone calling I a *****
I hears them calling out cutter-****
Now I wishes I didn't cut
I wishes I could prove them wrong
But now that dream sounds far too long
I made the choice and now I will loose
I wishes that I could choose
If I could I would choose life
If only I didn't grab that knife
October 25, 2016
thank god my mom found me before anything happened
MissingKid Jan 2019
Suicide is just a way to leave a problem
Suicide is what no one wants
Suicide is what no one expects
Suicide is a stupid thing
Suicide is… what suicide no one really knows is
Suicide is something I don’t need
Suicide doesn’t solve your problem
Suicide makes you loose what you already have
Suicide is the only thing that makes one problem even bigger
No more...
MissingKid Nov 2018
I come from a battered & broken
home.
Where i always felt alone.
I entered the world so cold.
Looking to be wanted, needed & loved.
I found heartbreak & pain.
I never gave up.
I knew one day down this long lonley
road of life there is someone to love
for me.
The road of loveless and pain come to
all end when i found a friend.


Now i know no matter how long the road
of life is,
you always stand strong & hold your
headlight.
I am a proud native woman
HEAR ME ROAR.

                                  ~~ A Survivor

(aka Jewel,me)
MissingKid Dec 2018
He stripped away my
self-worth, layer by layer
until there was nothing left
of my personality.
Yet I never thought
about the girl
who I used to be.
She lived inside,
my caged soul
waiting for the day
I would set her free.
Casting her light
into my dark mind,
hoping I will see,
flashes of a better life,
glimpses of possibility.
I was never alone
because me & him believed in me.
My amazing boyfriend helped me i love him so much
MissingKid Dec 2018
Come up to meet you
Tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you
Tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets
And ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a science apart
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start
I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
Tell me you love me
Come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start
MissingKid Jan 2019
You make me feel special,
You make me feel new,
You make me feel loved,
With everything you do.

You hold me close when I am sad.
You wipe the tears from my face.
Every time we are together,
It seems like the perfect place.

My eyes light up when you enter a room.
I smile when we are together.
No matter how bad things are,
You always make them better.

I love the way you kiss me,
The way you hold me tight.
I love the way you touch me,
I could be with you all night.

I love the way you can make me laugh
For absolutely no reason at all.
I love how no matter what I do,
You will be there to catch me when I fall.

I just want you to know,
That even though we sometimes fight,
I will always love you!
No matter what, day or night.
MissingKid Nov 2018
I don't know why
                                             I feel so down today.
The other day I
                                             Saw my best friend, as sharp as ever
Had her sharp nail
                                             go against my belly softly....
I thought seeing her
                                             would bring me pleasure
But instead I felt
                                             the old fear and sadness
I grabbed her wrist
                                      and told her to go back where she came from.
All she left
                                       was a long pink mark on my tummy
Now, that day
                                       I almost went back into old ways
All I could see at the moment
                                       was the scars I would have the rest of my life.
Last night was scary for me. I was about to ruin my 3 month streak from hurting my self....
MissingKid Nov 2018
You make me want to laugh when i want to cry
You make me live when i wan't to die
You make me smile when i wan't to frown
      You turned my life upside down
Believe in me when no one else does
       You're my now, my is, my was
When you call my name, i begin to blush
I'm afraid people will notice i need you so much
When i'm with you time seems to flies by so fast
MissingKid Nov 2018
my
existence
is not
about
how
desirable
you find
me
MissingKid Jan 2019
& if you
want to
cut yourself
remember that
I LOVE YOU
MissingKid Jan 2019
His name will live, brother
I feel hella ****** because it's like
if I would have known he was so cool
And it's like, if I would have watched interviews sooner, bro we were so alike
It's unfortunate because it's like, yo, when people die, that's when we like 'em, you know?
'Cause your remorse kinda makes you check 'em out

~~Lil' Peep
people only pay attention when a loved ones die
MissingKid Dec 2018
Don't be that way
Fall apart twice a day
I just wish you could feel what you say
Show, never tell
But I know you too well
Kind of mood that you wish you could sell
If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told a tight dress is what makes you a *****
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
I don't wanna be you anymore
Hands, hands getting cold
Losing feeling's getting old
Was I made from a broken mold?
Hurt, I can't shake
We've made every mistake
Only you know the way that I break
If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told a tight dress is what makes you a *****
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you... anymore
My story of my self esteem
MissingKid Nov 2018
The night is only a night,
Without you by my side,
The night turns into a magic,
Once in my arms you I hold!

The wet lips of yours get wetter,
As I keep on kissing,
As if I would die,
If I ever stop kissing you!

The hot night takes us in its lap,
You and I become one- like magic!
MissingKid Dec 2018
Look at the stars
Look how they shine for you
And everything you do
Yeah they were all yellow
I came along
I wrote a song for you
And all the things you do
And it was called "Yellow"
So then I took my turn
Oh what a thing to have done
And it was all yellow
Your skin
Oh yeah, your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
You know, you know I love you so
I swam across
I jumped across for you
Oh what a thing to do
'Cause you were all yellow
I drew a line
I drew a line for you
Oh what a thing to do
And it was all yellow
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
And you know
For you I'd bleed myself dry
For you I'd bleed myself dry
MissingKid Nov 2018
I love you with all my heart to the point where i cant explain it
When I look into your eyes I see a maple forest brown in the mist
                                of a beautiful fall season.

Your thick hair between my fingers runs & smooth like obsidian that
                                 flickers in the sunlight

         Your heart brings me joy that it fills a vessel in my heart

               Your laughter is like birds singing in the woods.
        
                A naturally beautiful, pleasant sound to my ears.
                
                Your'e my light when its dark and gloomy
MissingKid Nov 2018
I always thought true love was just a word...
until I met you <3
MissingKid Nov 2018
I am still the same in life
It is you who I still adore in life
It's you who I still want
You are there in my smile
It's you who I want to flaunt
You were a special part of me
You were a part of my destiny
Can't think of a day without you
Know that I truly love you
I loved the way you care
I loved the way you were there
Nothing is left in the whale of time
It is all over before I could find
It is all over from my side
There is nothing left to hide!
MissingKid Nov 2018
when i saw your body for the first time,
i realized how war torn you are
how many battles you lost
on your wrists
your thighs
how many fires occurred
on your sides
oh, your lovely sides
and how many times i told you
i love you, because i do
because no matter how many times
you have lost the battle
you will always win the war.
MissingKid Nov 2018
You gave me shoulder when i needed it
You showed the love when i wasn't feeling it
You helped fight when I was giving in

You made laugh when I was losing it
You are you are
The reason why I still hanging on
You are you are
The reason why my head is still above water
And if I could ide get you the moon I give it to you
And if death was coming for you ide give my life for you
You are you are
The reason why I still hanging on
You are you are
The reason why my head is still above water
And if I could ide get you the moon I give it to you
And if death was coming for you ide give my life for you
You are you are
Oh you are
Oh you are
You are...
You are you are
The reason why I still hanging on
You are you are
The reason why my head is still above water
And if I could ide get you the moon I give it to you
And if death was coming for you ide give my life for you
MissingKid Dec 2018
Hey - call me back when you get this
Or when you've got a minute
We really need to talk
Wait - you know what
Maybe just forget it
'Cause by the time you get this
Your number might be blocked

Look - now I know, we could've done it better
But we can't change the weather
When the weather's come and gone
Books don't make sense if you read 'em backwards
You'll single out the wrong words

"It's not you, it's me" and all that other *******
You know that's *******
Don'tcha', babe?

-Billie Eilish
Party Favor
This song just reminds me of my recent breakup.
But I changed the title.
MissingKid Nov 2018
If you're alone
I'll be your shadow

If you want to cry
I'll be your shoulder

If you're not happy
I'll be your smile

If you need me,
I'll always be here
MissingKid Nov 2018
I saw that you were
perfect & so i loved
you than i saw that you
were not perfect & i
loved you even more.
MissingKid Nov 2018
Thank you for being you...
for sharing your love with me...
for inspiring to accept myself...
for helping me see the unique beauty
in perfection...
for showing me that love is something you do;
something not just to be said,
but also to be shown.
MissingKid Nov 2018
You are worth your imperfections
You are worth your bad days
You are worth your good
You are worth your confusion
You are worth your insecurities
You are worth fighting for
& You are worth loving

  And that's a ******* fact
#love #worthit #you
MissingKid Nov 2018
My love for you knows no bounds,
it's timeless & endless.
You can enrich my life in more ways than i can express in words.
I felt strongly connected the moment i looked in your eyes.
I was drawn to your soul in a way i have never experienced before.
You are the only one that see the door to my soul
MissingKid Nov 2018
The day I met you, my life
changed… the way you make me
feel is hard to explain. You
make me smile in a special kind
of way...  you make me fall
deeper in love everyday ❤️
MissingKid Nov 2018
Have I told you yet...
How much you mean to me...
Have I told you yet...
About all the happiness you bring!
Have I told you yet...
That you mean the world to me!
Just in case I haven't...
I want you to know that...
You're the best thing
That's ever happened to me!
I love you.

— The End —