I want to cut you out of me,
But you leave splinters in my skin.
Where do I begin?
In removing you, I must remove a part of me
Only then can I be free.
Can I be free of you?
For a single moment, maybe?
Or am I doomed to live my life being happy
For a second
Only to drown in the guilt
Of not making you happy, too.

And there is nothing on this planet, or the next
That will change that any time soon.
You are the light in my eyes ,
And the bounce in my step
And the teasing smile as I turn to kiss you.
Be mine, for as long as you wish
Because in my heart, darling boy,
You have made a home.

It makes me sad to see how fragile your happiness can be.
I wish I could see you smiling for ever.
Not because you are the most beautiful when you smile, you are still beautiful in your pain.
I just wish you never had to know pain.
I want you to be happy because you deserve it.

when I dropped
your favourite mug
and it shattered
into a thousand pieces
when I spoke
your name
and only silence
was my greeting
when I played
your favourite song
and I couldn't hear
your voice
singing
when I laid down
in bed alone
I didn't feel your touch
just the raw stinging
when I showered
waiting for you
to peek
I stepped out
mute
wrapped in
aloneness
wishing your ghost
could speak