My horns are holding up my halo...

Just a mess
Something's always wrong
Or needs to be fixed
Or is out of place
And cracks start to damage the already flawed surface
In need of repair
And underneath...

Never seen such ruin
Something once so beautiful has become marred
A soul in shambles
Wonder what caused that to lose its light?
Have I always been such a mess?

The eyes say all that needs to be heard
Even when the mouth is silent

Inside the glass house
And those on the outside
Are the ones throwing the boulders
Chips of glass surround my feet
Leaving me nowhere to step
Unless I want to get cut
And I already have enough scars

I have to give you points for originality
I thought I had heard them all
All the reasons
All the excuses
As to why people break hearts
And you broke mine
Because you were scared of what could be
That's the first time I've heard of that
So you threw away everything over the possibility of something going wrong
That's smart

I would like to introduce the person in front of you
The name’s Ariana, I go by Ari
I was born on January 5th, which makes me a Capricorn
I’m the G.O.A.T (literally my zodiac symbol is the goat and I’m the greatest of all time)
Some of the things they say about my sign are true
I can be very difficult, and my tongue is so sharp, it could cut into your skin and leave scars
But at the other end of the spectrum, I’m as loyal as they come
And will always keep it 92+8 with you
I am 5 ft 5...and a half
I do not know how to ride a bike nor swim
And I could not hold a note if my life depended on it

I am still learning how to control what comes out of my mouth and what expressions dance across my face
My words can be cutthroat and my face is my personal snitch
You can tell how or what I feel, and I would not have to say a word
I was born with a fire in me that only blazes when needed

I like Coca-Cola
And anything that has the word “taco” in it
People say that I am rude
And my answer to that is always ‘thank you’
Cannot be nice to people nowadays anyhow
Especially, people, I do not like

I am unapologetically myself
My anxiety attacks and mood swings are a second skin
A storm encased within me, a whirlwind of emotions
I can go from laughing to smiling to stressed to depressed and back to laughing in 5 seconds
A kind of colorful mess I am

I have this fascination with nature
I feel it is the one thing God created that is not flawed
All the cycles
All the seasons
The dew that rests upon the grass
Have you ever just wanted to lie in a field of flowers
Makes me smile at the thought

I fall in love truly
Nothing about it is fake
Even if the person does not love me back
Or did not love me enough to keep me
Or did not stay around long enough to fall in love
It is their loss
Because I am a rare find
Like a black unicorn

Just to remind you
My name is Ariana
I like my solitude, stargazing, and enjoying moments that last a lifetime
I cry all the time
Sometimes over nothing, most of the time over everything
I have issues, and every time someone asks, “what’s wrong?”
My reply is most of the time ‘everything’ or ‘what isn’t wrong?’

Music nurtures my soul and laughter frees up space that negativity tries to overcrowd
I wake up every day and try to be happy about something
Even when I am not happy with myself
If asked to name all the things I love, I would not even think to name me
But everything is not all bad
I am still alive
And I feel I have a purpose
And that someone is listening
Even when I think they are not
I just get through the days
By being me

Beautiful ain't always pretty

Why would I wear my heart on my sleeve?
Such a dangerous place for it to be...