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509 · Feb 2018
Her
JIN Feb 2018
Her
Laying me down you kiss my cheek
You remember all the times that we laughed
All the times that we argued and cried...
All the songs that you memorized together....
They all are gone now
Faded and burnt
Thrown and blown away......
306 · Feb 2018
Father
JIN Feb 2018
He held my hand when I was scared
He tucked me in and taught me to share.
He told me he would never leave
And told me that he wasn't a thieve.

What it was I never knew
Is what real fathers are suppose to do.

He was a liar
A stealer too.

But fought battles that where hot as fire.
He may of tried his best
But he didn't pass the test.

Now sitting here in misery
Not knowing how to deal with grief
I may not be with him again
Even if he deals with his sins.

He left me.
I now I have no hand to hold......
This is about may dad and the situation that I'm in.
298 · Mar 2018
Wishful Dreaming
JIN Mar 2018
I look up and only see stars
You know there not that far

Unable to see the future and remember the past
But the present disappears so fast

It reminds me of his eyes.....
Nights filled with sorrow and sighs

Fields surrounding, full of lights
Pretending its alright

Darkness surrounds us now
While listening to distant howls

Breath like winds
Moans unable to apprehend

As stars start to vanish
He paints the sunrise on His canvas

I look over and you start to fade
My eyes fill with tears as emotions invade

Now only a distant memory
Feels like a century

Hiding under my fake smiles
Going though acres of trials

Glimpses of you at certain hours
Grab my attention and moments empower

Unable to witness you in sunbeams
Only able to stare at you in my dreams
My sister helped me with this....................
291 · Feb 2018
Resentment
JIN Feb 2018
She stared at the bathroom walls in disappointment
Wondering why the world resented her
Pleading for mercy she gouged her nails into her skin
She wailed for guidance from the world underneath
Distressed agony deep within
Seeking loyalty
But first to find acceptance

Maybe disfigurement would get society's attention
Anonymous of her torment
Rejection was present

Everyone knew of her authentic elegance
All except she

She observed
Reflected disfigurement
Multitudes of blemishes
And warped trajectory

She didn't know the one who neglected her the most
Was herself
#depressed #deformed #disappointment
207 · Apr 2018
his smile
JIN Apr 2018
His smile could light a thousand fires.....
202 · Feb 2018
Life v.s. Nature
JIN Feb 2018
Devastating existence pulls me downward
Gravity forces me down and forces me to live
Rushes of wind pull me forward
The earth says sorry and forces me to forgive
Senseless air drains my lungs
Once again, the earth pulls me down breaking my bones
Words carve and pierce my tongue
When nothings left to break, my body looks like piled stones
Wind and gravity stops as I breathe my last breath
Life flashes and before I know it
I take my last breath
As the world forgets I’d even existed.
Just wanted to let the world know that I wrote this....
199 · Feb 2018
She was beautiful....
JIN Feb 2018
Everyone glanced at her as if she were debris
Residue, that would never go away
Determined to go to an association but other mentality doubts
Her mother always told her "They don't care about how much you know until they know how much you care."
But the girl never achnoledged her mother
The girl thought her heart was unclean
Every moment was nonexistent
As if nothing was happening at all...
Her life had turned around, once acceptable to imperceptible
Pessimistic was she, as the world defyed her
Air was thick like wood as she held the last thing influential to her.
She swallowed the multitude of tablets all at once, trying to ignore the ****** taste
As she layed down and reflected her whole life
Happiness, tragedy, faith, expectations, achievement, ambition....
Lost in a nameless sea of faces, she exhaled her last breath in a silent scream
The world never knew her, not even her name
Despite her appearance or world of shame
Youth 're reconized her after her pass
Everyone gathered even her oppressors
Grief sorrow and misery were current
Her mother was right
Everyone cared because they knew....
188 · Mar 2018
Weather Torn Heart
JIN Mar 2018
The clouds have lifted and cleared
But my soul is still dark and depressed
I see the ocean
Craving the waves I want to swim...
Deeper into my emotion
Just to touch my beautiful
Yet painfully stricken brittle seafloor......
#depressed       #feelings      #beautiful     #yetugly
183 · Feb 2018
Reality....?
JIN Feb 2018
Sometimes everything seems like absolutely nothing.
Reality is there...
but only seen from a distance.
182 · Feb 2018
Lies and highs
JIN Feb 2018
My past may of been full of great pleasures.
But my my past was not full of words like treasures.
My past was full of lustful lives.
But my heart was also cut to pieces with knives.
Sometimes what feels good is just to reach that high
But why feel good, if all you tell is lies?
You might be scared
But I am to.
That's why I don't like to lie to you.
I reach my high just by looking into your eyes.
And I float away to unreachable skies.
181 · Feb 2018
What am I?
JIN Feb 2018
Unopened gifts are like undreamed dreams
There but not remembered

Friends are like clothes
There until unwanted

Life is like a match
Lit and put out.

We fade with every moment
And every moment fades with us

Faith is believed but not seen....
Love is seen but not belived

The question is..... what are.....
We?
#dont understand
175 · Feb 2018
Memories
JIN Feb 2018
You open the door and the torment slams you in the face
Glances of lifeless objects
Just the colors together are pain wrenching
Bright lights swaying back and forth
Darkness.... but running and hiding
You want to go back but the possible is impossible
You would do anything just to go back for a few moments
You feel it, you remember
The hugs and kisses
Clinging to affection and the midnight smoke
Everything all hits you all at once
Your breathing speeds up but slows altogether
Caught up in the moment you don't know what to do
You remember that its just a distant memory
Never to happen again
173 · Apr 2018
Hurt
JIN Apr 2018
You failed.
You don't get me back.
You live with misery,
I live with grief.
#dad
170 · Mar 2018
Coke Bottles?
JIN Mar 2018
"How do you let out all of your pain?" said the beautiful red-head.
"I write."
"How does that help?" asking questionably
"Do you know how when you open a coke bottle, and its shook up so its super full?..."
"Yes"
"Well, its kinda like that... You have to take it slow and let air slip one moment at a time." I say.
169 · Mar 2018
Stocked Jars
JIN Mar 2018
As the day grows
Darker and Darker
My mood falls
Deeper and deeper
Into the bottom
Of my new jar
Because all of the other hundreds
Are full
#full       #keptinside    #newjar
#alonewithmyself       #depressed

— The End —