A chaotic room I now possess,
a reflection of my mind,
where thoughts pile high,
and is at the verge of collapse.
I don’t change a thing,
not because I don’t care;
but the clutter feels familiar,
a strange comfort in the disarray.
Thoughts over thoughts,
questions over questions;
each one heavier than the last,
with indecision hanging in the air.
A fog that clouds my vision,
making it hard to see,
the good that lies ahead, and
what’s right in front of me.
Mistakes, guilt and all the regrets
they sit in the corners, gathering dust,
whispering in the quiet and dark,
reminding of what should have been.
Amidst the chaos are glimpses of light,
of blessings, love and laughs,
buried under the clutter, waiting,
to be rediscovered and to remind.
But for now, I let it be,
this chaos, this mess,
both in my room and in my mind,
not ready to make the tiniest space.
I sit amidst the clutter,
knowing that in chaos I find,
the most honest reflection,
of who I am, or who I've become.
I am not the same person anymore, and I can't go back to it anymore. Definitely not without you.