Iz - Hello Poetry

Iz Oct 2018

I am the
s
l
i
c
k
rocks in your water beds
across these vast forests
in those beautiful eyes,
always there never moving
stuck but not trapped
the gentle current always has something
I could never think of to say
so inspiring so consistent
time here is like
no other place this form of me has been
I believe the word to describe how I feel
in you is
home

I've never felt this way, so safe so secure.

Iz Oct 2018

Freedom

I wanted to write something about being free
but I couldn't think of anything because
I never have been

#freedom

Iz Oct 2018

For You

Drink me like milk
in the morning
and
honey
at night

#milk #honey #foryou #love

Iz Oct 2018

Molasses

It was slow, thick
s
w
e
e
t
God, it was something I have never had
A love so loving so pure,
and we made it
I remember when I knew I had dove too far into our thick sugary syrup
my finger tips grew tingly and my lips a shade of
blue
But you still loved me even though I was collapsing under this
responsibility of loving someone like I never had before
you held me close as our eyes never broke contact
in this caramelized casket we lay
As lovers
and fools.

Iz Oct 2018

Garden

Unstitch my soft skin,
dive in me,
Swim

Wash over yourself in my love,
love my fear that will
surge through you

Hold all my troubles in your hand,
Be my breathing
Garden

Iz Oct 2018

3’ off

The chatter in the room is almost mundane
The woman behind me has a dog she’s keeping outside who the neighbors aren’t too fond of because he’s a bit loud at night
I got to my hair appointment almost 15 minuets late as I slipped through the door of the I suppose modern styled ‘Yellow Strawberry’ my mother was on the phone
She wears this head set that wraps around your neck and never realizes she yells when she is talking to people and it makes me cripplingly anxious
The mirrors are tall and filled with unimpressed faces glaring at us as my marvelous royal purple polyester velvet skirt glistens in the sunlight peeking in from the dropped shades
I mutter out the time of my appointment apologize that we are late and give them my name
I know it is spelt wrong in the computer, and the odds of one of the people in here having a dog named bella are unbelievable high
As I’m escorted back to my hair dressers station I remember, I need to repaint my chipped glittery red nail polish before I pick all of it off and feel disgusting
But this particular nail polish is extremely difficult to get off and I regret every-time I paint my nails with it
But it looks so ******* beautiful in the sunlight and my lover adores the color against my almost porcelain like skin so I indulge from now and again
I am here to hopefully cut about three inches off of my hair, it’s getting too long it sits painfully at about an inch or two below my shoulders
Four months ago I cut off about 10 inches and I felt about 50 pounds of anxiety lift from my chest
I think my fears started to manifest in my curls and the knots that kept returning reminding me over and over again I needed a desperate change
And now I’m finding myself approaching another much needed change, it’s nice

#mundane #october #haircut

Iz Oct 2018

Shapes and Shadows

I am my own demise,
the ghosts that grip my past and the fears that shape my future,
I am the vacuum seal I put on my own mouth to keep these catastrophically painful things I am feeling inside,
I am everything I seem to feel and everything I never wanted to be,
but that’s just when I get stuck in my own head,
I know I am more but am I really more if my own head is all I seem To be,
it’s hard not to feel the negativity when it has been the only thing I’ve had through it all,
and in a way my own self hate is more comforting than excepting the flaws I must change,
and understanding I am not who I feel I am, some nights much similar to this one,
not even writing can help the cinder blocks piled in my guts,
but I suppose the time it took to write this was better spent than shoveling coal into my mouth and burning up my Insides,
sometimes we must smolder

Sometimes it is not the writing that heals me but the time I spend focusing on pouring myself out rather than overflowing.