**** it.
           **** myself.
Why do I miss you?
       Why do I do this to myself?
It's like I'm addicted to the pain it brings.
       To my heart, my mind.
                 When it makes my body ache.
I don't want you back.
   At least not like that.
          But it'd be nice to talk to you.
I'm beyond confused
        trying to figure out living without you
And when I shed a tear
   it's because things have become less clear
And to know you won't ever be near
         Really tears me apart, my dear.

I wage war
That's never been seen before
Is sanity worth fighting for?
I'm not really sure

Insanity?
A calamity?
I call it individuality!

Who is Society
To create this hypocrisy?!?
It seems like such a tragedy
To waste such ingenuity
To dull the creativity

I don't know who I am, let alone who I've let myself become. I used to care and be full of love and now I am cold. It happened so fast I still don't know what to make of it. I'm not sure who I am. To youiI may be, but inside I'm not me. I spend my time thinking and I'm destroying myself. Not eating the way I should is already showing up. Maybe that's what I want to do, destroy myself. Yet in a peaceful horrid way. Slowly self destruct myself with my own thoughts and self hate. I feel like part of me is gone, but I have no motivation to go find myself. So, here phone writing again trying to organize my thoughts..