Superheroes don't cry
They're not famous
They do not fly

Instead superheroes weep

They walk like you and I
But have a heart that bounds and leaps

Superheroes are the everyday stranger
The dust that stays loyal to abandon houses
The drops of water in a desert

Are dismal days headed our way?
Or could the blue
Carnival part the grey?

Fluttering red ribbons of the red carnival.
Warm blood
That welcomed in
The oncoming flood.

Spinning whites
The back of your eyes
The toothless grin of a cackling clown
A white carnival of white lies

Perfect.
I was not
insecure, fragile, forgotten.
They said I was
confident, kind, happy.
I was not
my mistakes, my shortcomings.
They'd never forgive
the people who hurt me.
They were my friends.
........................................................­................

They were my friends,
the people who hurt me.
They'd never forgive
my mistakes, my shortcomings.
I was not
confident, kind, happy.
They said I was
insecure, fragile, forgotten.
I was not
perfect.

The skeletons that spiral
On the golden stair
    Twin devils headed
Down, down, down...

Sweet fires
To burn out their eyes

The skeletons that spin
On graveyard silk
    Seven hundred beady eyes
Staring, staring, staring...

Pale hospital stench
Crowded on a bench
Waiting for the afterlife
Lines beyond sight, waiting, waiting....
Pale hospital. Stress and strife

Cleansed white tile
An endless isle
Anticipating the judgement, the trial
What have you done, what makes you worthwhile?

Pale hospital stench
Thrown down in the trench
Standing still in a war
Hoping that there'll be something more
Than holding your hand
While the machine goes, "beep, beep, beep!"

Welcome
to this pit of stars
you call the universe.
I call the bottom rim
crushed beneath the weight
of a black, breathless bag.

Now forgotten
under the dead and the days,
left in a landfill with
open eyes and outstretched palms.
Gotten over past pains
because they lie
like the dirt on top of you.

Splatter paint has stained
His sunlit skin
Blacks, blues, and grays chained
Him to his sin
Painted words have trained
Him on what could have been

His charcoal tears
Paved roads as they fell
And after years
I'm still under his spell
His streets still refuse to disappear,
Still lead me out of my hell

Give me wings
And I'll fly
Give me melody
And I'll be what every bird sings

Take my eyes
I'll be blind, I'll be wise
Take my feet
I'll crawl, I'll not accept defeat

Give me blue
And I'll be in the sky
Give me a day
And I'll say
Thank you.

Is running in circles worse
Than running in a square?
Is letting chaos disperse
Worse than carefully setting up a snare?

Am I speaking in tongues
Riddled with sores?
Am I to young
To say much more?

Is grasping at straws
Better than taking with bad cause?
Is rambling about life
Better than handing out my strife?

He said
the universe cannot feel,
so she
cried Fire with the stars,
and every breathing creature
tasted melody
in our rain.

She said
the universe cannot listen,
so he
fell silent with the sky,
and every breathless creature
heard
the flutter of her heart.

Search.
Through the clouds and under stone.
The sorrow bird has found it's perch
Inside my heart, nesting with my broken bones.

Ocean.
I apologize for being so crystal clear,
So easily read,
And so easy to fear
If you're not already dead.

Turtle.
Curl up my head in the dark
While you make a worried remark.
Don't fret. I'm just training to die.

Why am I afraid?
Outside the spotlight,
Do I think I'll fade?
Is that why I feel such a fright?

I'm hiding from the man in the mask.
I'm worried to pass under the arch.
So before I go I want to ask,
Why are you afraid of the dark?

You think love is a potion in a bottle.
It's a bullet in the barrel.

Why break your heart,
when you could break everything in the shadow of a cliff.

You think love is the thread of a tapestry.
It's a knot in the rope.

Why fall in love with perfection,
when you could just put a gun to your head?

I dropped my eyes,
And they shattered
At your feet.
My tongue is in tatters,
And never speaks no matter how hard it tries.
I have no sleeping flowers,
So it has to be enough
To take the ashen hand
That guides me to my grave.

They'll give you rainbows
That hold every hue
They'll give you greys and blues
From every bruise they can show

They'll give you a part
Of their dreams
They'll hand you a heart
That's tearing at the seams

They'll ask if you heard
The notes in their song
They'll ask if it's wrong
To share a world instead of a word

He fills the dry places
And brings the blooms anew
She is the air
Slipping in and out of you
To see what your heart holds true
The burning flame that jumps from soul to soul

He falls like a tear
Quiet
He falls like rain
Wild, graceful
She doused the pain
Like a smile, like a gentle pull
Into the Lotus Garden

Can I lose
What I never had?
Can I win what I choose
And still be mad?

Thorns pricking me
Blood will fall away,
Like love that exceeds the depth of the sea
And still refuses to stay

Can I steal
Their wandering eyes?
Can I feel
And never be the one that cries?

Thorns pricking me
Blood will fall away,
Like love that is free
And so, refuses to stay

Fog does not crawl
Like people do
He doesn't beg on hand and knee

Fog does not conceal
What is looming there
He just let's it disappear

Fog does not revive
The demons and the dead
He just pulls them from your head

And to think-
to remember in these ten seconds-
that we screamed till our throats
were torn and tattered.
Now knowing none of it
was necessary
and regretting how righteous
it felt ripping out the pages
we could have written to fill the blankness
before darkness came down with its iron fist.

Your hands are broken
And your heart is sparking at your feet
You won't leave 'till you've spoken
And your fists will pound 'till we're beat

You're a liar
Make the smoke swirl and spin
And call it magic so they'll fly higher
Into the moments that have been

Your hands are broken
And you're a pillar of flame
You won't leave 'till you've spoken
And suffocated the world with shame

You're a seamstress
Snatching up old sins
That aren't yours to confess,
Secrets you'd bled from beneath my skin

It's easy to lie,
Or let the words in my mouth
Fade. Just to let them die.

It's easy to forget
One day I'll be with them,
And that silence will be my last regret.

It's not easy to smile,
But for them I can try, because
What if we only have a little while?

My fingertips are frayed
like my favorite pair of jeans.
My hair is grey
like the faded pencil marks
in my old diary, my book of dying dreams.
My back is bent
like the crook in my couch
where I used to read a stack of books.

My mind
is missing like the word in an
incomplete

There's a key
I have to- I need to find
There's a bird on a tree
That's feeling confined

A song
Racing around my head
A wrong
Left all the Right's dead

Maybe it's a curse
That I always find what's worse
Maybe it's a taunt
Because it's exactly what I want

Leaving the blacks and whites and the grey
To a garden, blue and red and violet,
Where I should hope to stay

Escaping the calls of death
In melodies of flying birds
Who lend me breath

Wandering in a fantasy
Of fog, blue and red and violet,
When I can't bear to see

Overcrowded.
Words, melodies, dreams that I forgot.
Where can I
Fit you in?

Claustrophobic.
The walls are coming down
In the worst of ways.
How many days
Can I see that same frown?

Person.
One has me caught
In a snare.
How could I have thought
Love would be fair?

Broken bones, discarded glass
Bodies are buried, hearts reap ash

Beaten black soles
Bleed into the world
Bright stars once hid there

Blazing fires where devil's roam
Burning hate, scorching screams claim home

Boiling skin, bubbling with words that recall days
Before the crisped carriage came

Faucet spit out your water
Cry out the cold
Now make it hotter

Make sure the flow
Is steady
But I don't want it slow

Make sure it comes out crisp and clear
Make it soft and known but still queer

I want it to be heard
But don't shout it
That takes from the beauty of words

His eyes droop
A smile plays on his face
The knife is in my palm

Quiet -so quiet-
His breaths fall
To the ground
And rise to the sky

He could never know.
How could he ever know?

Love and hate
Sane and insane
Whispers and screams
Blurry lines,
Red, crisscrossing lines

A kiss he didn't deserve
To lose
My heart pulsed with his,
Such perfection lying in my filth
Death take me now
Before I stay with him

There is no sound like silence
Like the collecting dust
Like the colors on a soul

There is no fire like love
Like a child's touch
Like inspiration's desperate clutch

There is no sound like silence
Like the gathering moments
Like the gathering words

I know how to dance
In the pouring rain.
I know there's not a chance
I can fall without pain.

I don't know
The cruelty of scars,
But neither have I felt the glow
Of the midnight stars.

I know how to hold my breath
In the deep blues and grays.
I know that death
Is the only promise of my days.

I wanted to say something
Off the top of my head.
I wandered in circles, in a spiraling ring.
A corpse that doesn't know she's dead.

I had something
On the tip of my tongue.
I wrung out my hands, ripped out the bones,
'Till there were no fingers left to wring.
A breath that never filled her lung.

I need something
To be the thrum of my heart.
Something -someone- more than a fling
And who won't so soon depart.

Words are naught but ashes on our tongues
Blown behind us
From icy wind once buried in the lung

Fallen on the ground like snow
Footprints left untraceable
Children lost, no where to go

And I hope for them to reignite
A fire that we've long since put out
I hope the children choose to write

Spilling,
Black against a winter white
Seeping through the snow
-layers of skin-
Resting on red
That thrums and sings,
That whispers life, and
Withers in the end

I hope the words
Will engrave themselves on my lips
So when my words are broken and blurred
I can have one last sip

I'm hardly ready to go with ease
Into your eternal keep
So just a moment please
This is my time to weep.

Dark, damp with tears
Shivering, shaking with hunger

Alive, alone with the rest of the sky

His whispers are the moon
Soft
Illuminating

"Don't let them see you down,
Don't let Hope die
Before you draw your last breath."

Ripped her fingertips back
So they could bleed her delusions
Ate her ears like a tasty snack
So she could stave off the intrusions

A nightmarish mist
Curled up behind her eyes
A neglected twist
Crouched behind each of her little lies

Gouged out her souls
So she could feel
Filled in the holes
Of her achilles heel

Petals swimming in the sunlight
Stained by these evening dreams

Pinks that settle with the emerald shards
And watch the stars gather above
A whirlwind of love

A peaceful heart ache
The letting go,
An anger for the red petals to take

A promise of the days ahead
That beauty and joy will return
A bouquet of flowers for the dead

Louder. Louder. Louder!
Throw the blue glass
-the two that see-
Behind a curtain to
Listen. Listen... Listen

Please!
Fire burns inside me
Thinking of the crisp wind
Blowing stains of autumn
Patience.

Farewell.
Chipped white class
On a dark blue -black to me-
Tablecloth
Goodnight.

BACKWARDs and forwards,
reeling in when THOUGHTS go out.
they can't give SOMETHING as small
as a goodbye letter with a mispeled word,
even when someone IS MISSING them.
they've taken SOMETHING and it
IS making you BREATHLESS.
you were only BROKEN apart
for a moment, for another kiss, but
he was searching for other HEARTS.
wipe your TEARS,
if not FOR yourself,
then certainly for THE
DEAD.
------------------------------------------------
BACKWA­RD THOUGHTS
SOMETHING IS MISSING
SOMETHING IS BREATHLESS
BROKEN HEARTS
TEARS FOR THE
DEAD

A little lost between
The slipping moments.
Maybe I should try caffeine
Or learn to be content.

A little too found inside
The tireless thoughts.
Maybe I should fight like I always fought,
Or put down my pride.

I'm just a whisper now,
just a thought hovering above the piano key,
just small smile before the bow.
Oh but the encore! Oh the glee!

I think maybe when I'm forty-
when my smile sets in-
I'll be old then.
But not now. For now I'm a song of freedom
from a choir of rebels. For now I am a symphony.

Today I am eighty. I am old again,
just a breath away from a hollow lung,
just a chip away from a smile set in stone.
How unfair, to be young once but old twice.
How disconcerting the down fall
after the curtain call.

Echoes
From the last man
In this haunted mouth

Feathery pinks
Deepening blues
Hues
Leftover from when he awoke

Plump water drops
Piercing emerald blades
Passing time that never offered, never gave
He left it all a hollowed cave

Stop waiting
Stop speaking
Stop caring

Tornadoes and fire
Water and glass
Words that fit like puzzle pieces
If you say them right

The little raindrops seeping through your mind
The perfect words
That mean nothing

Stop shouting
Stop crying
Stop asking

Magic, illusions
Dreams, wishes,
Hope and faith
Love and death
Stop

Wearing her whitest wool
And a golden pin, pushed and pulled
Across her best blue coat
Until his darkness pulls it tight around Lucy's throat

Wearing his black mask
Rubbing the pearl between his grey claws
He held the corpse but still no one dared to ask
Just sent him on his way to bear an eternal flaw

They met in the center of their war
Dropping tears in their wake
And again held up the even score
Dissatisfied with the thirst eternity could not slake

Swallowed up
The sun beats down,
Knocking on my coffin
Rain falls down,
More tears for another life
Sheets of ice
Taunting my nerves

Swallowed up
No heaven wants me
No hell can contain me
So I have my wish then, to lie underground
As pensive dust

To the place where
The sky must start.
Past the gaps, and through the glare
Of a ticking, bleeding heart.

To the edge, to the dark,
To a lonely place I must embark,
And meet a rumored man, who is neither foe nor friend.
To the place where the sky must end.

Free falling
Wings stretching
Birds calling

Tripping on my thoughts
Misguided by desire
Almost there, almost caught

Free falling
It's over now
Mother's calling
Death has kissed my brow

Wines of melancholy
Thorns of ignorance burrow deep
Within the pounding heart
That bird should shriek at wind
To lift and carry higher under-wing

Smelling sleeping flowers
And wandering in a haze
Closes dreams to reality
That gold can grant a life
To steal it back in greed

Turning life on death
Wishing graves to rot
Or mothers to caress
That moment brother murders brother
To end his life as well

Codes inside my eyelids
Telling me
Exactly what to see
Friends are enemies
Love is hate

Woven finger tips
I feel
The threads they've sown,
I have the cards they deal

Everything I do is disconnected and
Never mine.
It's very simple:
I am a monster by design.

Black blood squeezed up from my heart.
Sometimes it’s caught, stuck in my throat,
Letting slivers of art
Elude me, and ink only drizzles off my tongue.

It's caught in my sight
The swirled swish of passions power
Goes long beyond the hour, sneaking past the night

And so it always seems to be
That rancid air will neither come nor leave my lung,
Because I am drowning –smiling, in the pages of an open sea.