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 Apr 2016 Axle Avatari
gray rain
My thoughts twist
When I'm about to speak
And my head changes what I want to say
It's like I'm scared
Of my thoughts
But I'm not
I want to say something
But I'm hiding in a shell
A shell of fear
A barrier
Between my head and heart
That with 3 words could be gone
I want to speak
But I can't
And it's killing me
 Apr 2016 Axle Avatari
gray rain
there's a hole in my heart
and its growing
there's a hole in my heart
only words will fill
there's a hole in my heart
and I'm calling for help
there's a hole in my heart
and my screams are silenced by my  head
there's a hole in my heart
and it'll grow if nothings said
there's a hole in my heart
and soon I'll be dead
 Apr 2016 Axle Avatari
gray rain
I don't want to fight any more.
I don't see the point of this internal war
I have with myself
When I know the way I've felt
I sick of this mental barrier
and my tongue not being a carrier
of my words.
Like the birds,
I wish I was free
It could happen, I'll see
on that day
when I can say
the words I've been longing to say
 Apr 2016 Axle Avatari
gray rain
yesterday
I missed a chance
I missed the chance to tell you
how I feel
so my mind can be at rest
and my life become real
I couldn't tell you
those words
those words that replay
over and over in my head
for days, weeks, months
those words I need to be free from
I came so close
but my message was hidden
I need to break free
from this feeling
but I can't
I can't and it kills me
maybe next time
but next time I still won't be able to speak
I wrote this freestyle. It's just what flowed from my mind
 Apr 2016 Axle Avatari
Darren
Dear Future Lover,

I am waiting for you like spring
after the long winter,
like the wretched poet
waiting for his muse.

Perhaps you are already here,
perhaps you are far away,
but worry not my love,
for already I call for you.

Soon our hands shall lock
like gates of a strong keep,
soon our knees shall kiss the ground
as we whisper “I do” to forever.

Together we will build a home
filling it with the laughter of children.
Together we will build a road
to carry each other to heaven.

Oh my love, heaven is not far off,
for the children will grow and
soon have children of their own,
filling this house with laughter again.

Though someday the laughter will end,
replaced with joyous weeping.
know now my dear,
we are destined for much greater things.

The gift of man will not escape us,
nor should it, one of us will linger,
the other force to depart.
Do not fear this end.

So I wait, my love, I wait,
as the fisherman does for dawn.
I wait for you to grasp this
wanting hand from the dark.
They walk by brisk
Covered in umbrellas
On high heels with ankles
Of no appeal

They grab the shaft
With both hands
As the wind tries to steal
Their umbrage

With agility
They skip over puddles
As I marvel
At the procession

With destined determination
They ****** on
As spiked high heels
Grapple on cobblestone

Rainy day women
In gray coats and wet umbrellas
Under overcast skies
With no hellos or goodbyes
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