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767 · Aug 2015
Beaten path
Emily Aug 2015
I hated the smell, yet I inhaled it willingly.
It stuck to me like tar, yet I touched it voluntarily.
I'm the epitome of a beaten path.
I was once impenetrable, I was once  indestructible.
Now trapped in a paradox. An endless abyss of nothing.
I'm the epitome of a beaten path.
I couldn't find big enough words to make you love me.
I didn't know how to phrase what I feel, I'm not a human dictionary.
I'm the epitome of a beaten path.
You walked my beaten path, you said you'd heal the pain.
I should  have known you'd make it worse, not make it go away.
I'm the epitome of a beaten path.
You walk it every day.
551 · Jul 2015
Maybe, I'm Alive.
Emily Jul 2015
With blood cascading constantly,
These narrow glim lines under my pale skin,
I question, maybe I'm alive.

That the raging hammer thumping,
The hollow heart in my chest,
Means I am simply existing.

These soft inhales and exhales,
Thick polluted air,
It must mean something.

Though it could be confusion,
Simply too real to be illusion,
Definitely not delusion.
Maybe I've come to a conclusion.
To end my manic mental drive,
Maybe I'll live not to survive.
I think I am alive.
I like this - I thought the second stanza would end better with the word 'existing', thus given the final realisation in the poems' final line more potency. Just a thought anyway -
436 · Aug 2015
Untitled
Emily Aug 2015
Sudden gasps.
Deep breaths for air.
A question.
Do they really care?

The thump.
Hammering in my chest.
A question.
Who knows of me best?

A shine.
Glistening in my eye.
A question.
Can they make me cry?

A smile.
Widening on my face.
A question.
Is it out of place?

A question.
Should I dare ask?
The happiness.
Was it a mask?

Everything,
Stopping
Gasping
Thumping
Shining
Smiling

A stop.
Preventing me of breath.
A question,
288 · Dec 2016
I am alive.
Emily Dec 2016
With blood exploring every inch,
Trails of footsteps under my skin,
Reminding themselves of the places they had been.

As if they are waiting for a end that will never begin,
All entered in a competition to the thought they'd never win,
My mind an open ground for dumping.

The raging heart hammer once again thumping,
These soft inhales, my chest lifting and jumping,
Thick polluted air failing to contaminate,
The stars in your heart illuminate.

Dark dull spacious eyes hoping to duplicate,
Breathing a universe back of love to a abyss of hate ,
Reaching the victory only to contemplate

Maybe I'll live not to survive.
I think I am alive.

— The End —