Tonight, I will forget
And leave the memories
Of you
And all about you
On the shore.
I will let the waves
Wash every fragment
Of your smile
And smell
Because my love,
I want to see again
How the sun rises
Over the horizon.
I want to feel
How the sun touches
My cheeks.
I want to travel
The world
And marvel
At the beauty it holds.
I want to run
And feel alive again
On every splash
Of wind
On my face.
My love,
Though I cannot love less
Than I feel for you,
I must forget you.
I must leave you.
You have been
A handcuff,
I can no longer write.
You have been
A blindfold,
I can no longer see the light.
You have been
A shackle to my feet,
I cannot move on and be released.
Tonight, I will let
Myself be drowned
With tears of you
For the last time.
I will let
Myself be caged
Inside the cocoon
Of your painful memories
Because tomorrow,
I will fly.

I am not god fearing
I am not one to condemn others to hell
Nor flirt with angels

But
there's something about us
something that I cannot describe

Because
ever since the first night we've met

Fate is all I can think about

human zoo
animal comes here
to see humans…

I got used to your morning texts. Maybe that's what made waking up quite difficult. I had to wake up every morning wondering why I had to feel that hole in my chest. And trying to shrug it off by the coffee you didn't want me to drink.
I got used to your sweet messages. Maybe that's why receiving messages became difficult. I expect your name everytime my phone beeps and it's killing me to realize you don't probably have my phone number anymore. So I try pushing the thought away by messaging boys you never wanted me to talk to.
I go through the day trying to tear away my mind from you. Trying to fit myself to any other puzzle but the memory of the old you. I try so hard to keep myself busy but I still pause when I feel my heart clench because of the things that remind me of you.
I know what I want. I know I love you. No, the old you. I love how the old you loved me so hard it felt like I was on cloud nine. You loved me so much I didn't bother loving myself because you filled me up. So when you dropped, "wala na kong nararamdaman" I didn't know what else to do. It's just so... Difficult.

It is springtime in the capital.
I visit here every year on this day.
it was the day he died
so long ago
so very long ago.
in a war no one remembers.
Cherry blossoms are abundant
everywhere I look
warm spring sunshine is glowing.
The wall is long and filled
with the uncountable
names of the fallen.

I look for the name
of my boyhood friend Joseph Reilly
It is always hard to find.
So many names so much sadness.

We served together in Nam
I hear the explosion
the flash of the landmine.
He gave his life that I might live
a gift beyond any gratitude.

A shaft of sunlight falls
onto the gold filigree
of the names on the wall.
On my white shirt they reflect
like on a screen.
I see his name on me
as though he is reaching to me
to say I love you man.
I whisper not as much
as I love You Joe.

A cloud passes the sun
and his name melts
from my white shirt
On the granite wall it stays

I try to exfoliate the earth so that I  may be released from her pores

if you've met god then you know satan and I don't know if you or I are the odd ones out