i wish somebody wanted to hold my hand
i tell a group of friends
as we sit in a circle at a downtown coffee shop
this is my way of saying
that i don't think anyone has ever been in love with me
i have a habit of attracting people
who only hold my hand
when they want to hold me down
this is my way of telling them
that a boy i met at a party
held my hand only long enough to lead me upstairs
my breath scented with wine coolers,
his hand wrapped around mine
as he lowered me on his bed
he only held my hand to hold my wrists
while i struggled
so i didn't stop struggling
this is my way of saying
i feel like picture you hide in your drawers
a foggy memory
this is my way of saying
i wish someone wanted to hold my hand

a poem for a friend who is slowly dying from a rare brain disease


this day.



nothing

left in

my old

jean pockets,



only a

point

of view

you,



and it is

as soothing

as a

summer

california

sun upon

my body,



and as

holy

as a

sermon

from my

sunday

church.



I kick

off my

shoes

and run

my feet

through

this park's

uncut grass,



I am

certain

some where

in Carolina

that you

must be

doing the

same,



then I

pause

look up

at the

clouds,



and I

wish upon

them to

myself.



please one

of you

take me

to where

you are.,



but only

silence

greets me

as they

pass from

view.



and I am

left behind

once again.



with this

day

and this

point of

view of

you.



that tastes

like



honey upon

my lips..

You love me? I love me, too.
We have something in common.
Let's be friends, until the end.

You hate you? I hate you, too.
We have yet more in common.
Let's be brothers, you and I.

faith
a spirit
that
dwells inside of me
that
breathe
the
heaven
light of glory
and
i
am still sure

oh
lord
faith
is
a different storm
inside of me
only
you
know how strong
that
pain would be
for
what it is worth
please
hear my call
no more hurt
dear lord
restore me
only
because
a different storm
inside of me