Every night, I think about texting you again. But will you reply? Absquatulated. You absquatulated me. You left without saying goodbye.

I ruminated everything. Did I do something wrong? I'm waiting, but I shouldn't be.

Sometimes I think, "I'm glad you let me go, cause I wouldn't." But I realized how many times it happened to me. Those little times felt like a million times.

I wish to the heavens, "I hope he see something that reminds me of us, so that he will know how he broke my heart, so that he will know how it felt when he broke my heart."

I cried for the first time writing on my diary. When I wrote something there, it's just anger. But finally, there's another emotion. I cried when i wrote you in my diary, knowing that nothing ever lasts, and you're one of it.

Maybe at the start, you loved me, but little by little, you'll start to hate me. I still love you, but don't even think of me wanting to see you again. Because everything I loved will fade away.

It always crosses my mind, "Do people only love me cause they couldn't find someone to love?" I knew you would do the same thing, but I still chose you. Atleast you know how I love someone, right?
I feel like, I'm just someone's short happiness. When they get tired of it, they leave it and let it be abandoned.

Don't worry, I'll forget you like you forget me. But I feel like it would take a lot of time to forget everything about you.

I miss you, but I hate the fact that I miss you.

A feeling that I tried to escape lately,
With the surroundings going slowly.
My heart falls in love like crazy,
When I see you smile brightly.

"Just really wanna be your own love."
That lyrics was dedicated to you,
But you look at me I know you feel so true.

I've come to find the one for me,
But I didn't realize the 'one' was just right beside me.
Stop smiling cause it shows your dimples,
Cause it feels like you get me so simple.

Was I in your song list?
Cause you listen to me like I was a gift.

Were you the narrator of my life?
You get me so high just like the light.
Despite all of this,
You gave me the hope to be like 'this.'

Just smile to me and I'll be alright,
But you're so far and that makes me so fright.
Just one more night and I'll be like a kite,
Cause when I'm with you I am find.

"And after all, I was just a fallen angel."
Words that gets through me,
With a dream where I went through it.
Dying as I write this poem, feeling as being swollen.

Everything was all just a test,
When I just needed a rest.
"How can a beautiful soul become a fallen angel?"
I know too much, for I have sinned.

My body is destroyed, yet my soul is still standing.
Despite being considered perfect,
I was lucifer, the fallen angel, rebelled against my own blessed.


Why are so many are startled by my drastic shift?
They say I turned into a horrible monster,
When I was once called the most beautiful angel.
Don't be too shock,
The Devil has many faces.

Hold me like you know I deserve to be loved,
And make me realize im your best-loved.
Wrap me up inside your heart,
And we can light up this dark.

Kiss me, and make me feel like I'm your only,
Like no one in the world exists, and we can enjoy this time slowly.
Let our lips touch like stars,
And so it can heal our scars.

Love me, because our time now is timeless,
In a world that's just us, everything is priceless.
Make me wonder what part of you did I love the best,
And I'll answer: I loved them all the brightest.

Someone asked me if I ever thought of ending everything, what made me stay?

Of course, most people will say... because of him or her. But, will my answer be different if I say mine?

If I ever thought of ending everything, and what made me stay. My answer is the future.

I find it solace to answer the future, cause if I ever think of ending everything I'll just think of the future and forget everything. I'm not living for the present, but I'm living for the future. I mean, aren't we all?

When someone made a promise, aren't we waiting for the future? When we decide to do everything, aren't we going to the future?

Basically, everyday is the future. It's like a mystery gift we unbox everyday to find out what's inside.

The future make me want to stay. The future is a gift I love to unbox, yet it maybe happy, sad, or anger but we can always put it on the trash if we don't want it right?

Did you realize something? It's a metaphor that I love to say too. "Put it on the trash if you don't want it." Basically, forget about the past.

Sometimes we might feel like we don't want to continue, or sometimes the opposite. I feel like that too. But what always make me stay is the future, we don't know what the future holds and I still want to unbox it. I still want to hold on for the future.

Bawat gabi, buwan ay palaging sumisipot,
Puso ko'y sugatan, hindi makatulog.
Sa mga nakaraang nais kalimutan,
Hindi tumitigil, para bang walang katapusan.

Pero sa bawat paghinga, sino ba ang tinatanaw?
Napaisip ako, ikaw pala aking minamahal.
Makita lang kita, pait ng kahapon ay nawawala,
Pag ibig kong ito, lalong lumalala.

Boses mo ay tila mga awit,
Sa sakit kong ito, ikaw ang nagpapagaling.
Mga yakap mo lang ay maramdaman ko,
Tingnan mo sinta, mga sakit ko'y naglalaho.
Kahit malalim man ang sakit,
Ikaw lang sinta ang nagpapagaling.
Kaya sa puso kong ito,
Ikaw ang tunay na damdamin.

Kaya't sa pagdating ng gabi,
Asahan **** ako'y magmamaliw
Sa mga labi **** matatamis.

Kaya tandaan mo sinta,
ikaw ang lunas sa sakit na kirot,
Aking mahal, ikaw ay aking gamot.

May pangalan sa hangin na tila humahaplos,
Pangalan na gusto kong limutin tuwing sasapit ang hapon.
Sa bawat patak ng ulan,
Isang alaala ang siyang unti-unting nalilimutan.

Limot, sa mga sandaling ika'y nakasama,
Ay siyang unti-unting nalulumot.
Pero ang mga nalulumot na ito ay ayokong pakawalan,
Kaso nasasaktan ako, dahil ikaw mismo ang lumilisan.

Napakahirap na limutin ka,
Maalala ka lang, mata ko ay nagluluha.
Ako'y hinihila ng sakit,
Dahil bakit parang napakadali sa'yo na ito'y lagpasin?

Bakit hanggang ngayon nakabaon pa rin ang iyong magandang mukha?
Sa tuwing sisikat ang araw,
Ito'y nakapagpapakumbaba.

Kahit man ang oras ay magbago,
Ang pagmamahal ko sayo'y hindi maglalaho.
Na kahit man ika'y lumimot
Ang puso ko ay sayo lang titibok.

Ang buhay ay parang isang nobela,
May mga karakter na papasok sa kwento mo,
Meron silang layunin na gagampanan
Pero hindi magtatagal, sila'y lilisan rin.

Unang kabanata, nandyan na ba sila?
Anong klaseng karakter kaya ang isinulat ng manunulat?
Maisasama ko kaya sila sa kwento kong maulap?

Pangalawang kabanata, meron pa pala.
Anong klaseng aral kaya ang hatid nila?
Hanggang dulo na ba sila?

Pangatlong kabanata, ay dinagdagan pa pala niya.
Hindi ka ba nauubusan ng iisipin, aking manunulat?
Kailan ka kaya mapapagod?

Pang-apat na kabanata, may bago ng pahina.
Anong usapan kaya ang magbibigay kulay sa pahinang ito?
Ikaw at ako, siguro.

Pang-limang kabanata, dagdagan mo pa.
Anong suliranin naman kaya ang maisusulat mo manunulat?
Sana, wag mo akong pahirapan.

Pang-anim na kabanata, kamusta ka na kaya?
Maitutuloy mo pa kaya ang pahina?
Tinatamad ka na bang magsulat?
O naubusan ka na ng tinta?

Pang-pitong kabanata, ang saya.
Salamat manunulat sa pahinang ito,
Patuloy mo pa kaya akong bibigyan ng biyaya? Para matuloy ang ligaya?

Pang-walong kabanata, kay saya naman sa isang nobela
Ang manunulat na ang bahala,
Bahalang mag plano kung anong mangyayari sa kabanata.

Pang-siyam na kabanata, nasa gitna na ba?
Nasa simula pa ba tayo, manunulat?
Kailangan ka kaya mapapagod sa pag-uulat?

Pang-sampung kabanata, bakit naman ganon manunulat?
Ang dami mo namang binigay na problema,
Simple lang naman ang hiniling ko,
Na wag mo akong pahirapan.

Ikalabing-isang kabanata, may tutulong kaya?
"Sino kaya ang tutulong sakin?" Napaisip ang karakter
Manunulat, bibigyan mo pa ba siya ng ligaya?

Ikalabing-dalawang kabanata, saan pa ba patungo ang nobelang ito?
Lahat ng karakter ay lumilisan na,
At nag-iisa na ang pangunahing karakter
Maawa ka naman, aking manunulat.

Ikalabing-tatlong kabanata, may katapusan pa ba ang nobelang ito?
Napapagod na ako, aking manunulat
Bigyan mo naman ako ng pahinga.

Tama na, manunulat.
Nagsusulat pa ba tayo dito ng nobela?
Bakit lahat sila'y lumisan na?
Akala ko ba, hanggang dulo na sila?

Teka, nasa loob ba ako ng nobela?
O sinasalamin ko lang ang sarili ko sa isang nobelang nabasa ko
Tama nga ako, ang buhay ay parang isang nobela,
May sarili itong simula, gitna at wakas
Na akala natin ito'y patuloy na mag-uulat

Naalala ko nga pala,
Ako nga pala ang sarili kong manunulat
Ako ang mag-uulat sa buhay kong maulap
Naalala ko, tayo nga pala ang gumagawa sa sarili nating kahulugan.

Hindi mo naman makikita ang kahulugan mo,
Kung hindi mo bubuksan ang isip mo
At kung hindi mo dadamdamin ang puso mo.

Oh sige na aking manunulat,
Ituloy mo na ang iyong pag ulat
Sa karakter na nais **** bigyan ng kahulugan,
Sa karakter na nais **** maulat.
Sa iyong sariling nobela.